Slice of Life
Do you believe that love is natural? That it's a spontaneous emotion that connects us deeply with another human being? That makes us happy when that person is happy? That it's uncontrollable, inexplicable, feral and free?
Or are we confusing love with what is simply the freshness and sexual desire of a new romance?
Long after the butterflies have flown, the mark of Cupid's arrow has faded, and the purple prose of Byron has lost its music, what truly keeps a couple together?
What truly makes us want to continue loving someone?
We often talk about falling in love, as if it's something we can't help. But love is a decision, a choice we consciously make and one that we constantly need to make.
In the initial phase of a relationship, we choose to appreciate and understand the unfamiliar, focus on the good and overlook the bad. We forgive readily and constantly seek to pamper the other.
But as the passion and romance begin to fade, we start to do the opposite. We react negatively to what we deem negative. Where previously, we mitigated and even drowned the bad feelings with oceans of good vibrations, we now keep denying the desert the one thing it needs to grow lush and green again.
We would like to believe that love is unconditional. But most of us are not able to attain that kind of love. Even if we all are capable of unconditional love, it will take a myriad of illuminating experiences, time and effort to achieve.
How then can we realistically keep our relationships alive?
The key is in revisiting what made it so great in the first place. What clicked? What was the greater "good" that made us ignore the minor grievances?
We'll find that the formula for "love" remains the same. The more we choose to give, the more we receive. The more we forgive, the more peace we feel. The more importance we place on the relationship, the more joy it produces. The more we kiss and laugh, the more time we want to spend together.
When we choose to be the better man, we become the better couple.
An image of panike
Yes
Or are we confusing love with what is simply the freshness and sexual desire of a new romance?
Long after the butterflies have flown, the mark of Cupid's arrow has faded, and the purple prose of Byron has lost its music, what truly keeps a couple together?
What truly makes us want to continue loving someone?
We often talk about falling in love, as if it's something we can't help. But love is a decision, a choice we consciously make and one that we constantly need to make.
In the initial phase of a relationship, we choose to appreciate and understand the unfamiliar, focus on the good and overlook the bad. We forgive readily and constantly seek to pamper the other.
But as the passion and romance begin to fade, we start to do the opposite. We react negatively to what we deem negative. Where previously, we mitigated and even drowned the bad feelings with oceans of good vibrations, we now keep denying the desert the one thing it needs to grow lush and green again.
We would like to believe that love is unconditional. But most of us are not able to attain that kind of love. Even if we all are capable of unconditional love, it will take a myriad of illuminating experiences, time and effort to achieve.
How then can we realistically keep our relationships alive?
The key is in revisiting what made it so great in the first place. What clicked? What was the greater "good" that made us ignore the minor grievances?
We'll find that the formula for "love" remains the same. The more we choose to give, the more we receive. The more we forgive, the more peace we feel. The more importance we place on the relationship, the more joy it produces. The more we kiss and laugh, the more time we want to spend together.
When we choose to be the better man, we become the better couple.
An image of panike
Yes