a piece of my death

[sleeze]

If I were a month, I'd be: October
If I were a day of the week, I'd be: Monday, everyone hates monday.
If I were a time of day, I'd be: 11:11
If I were a planet, I'd be: Uranus
If I were an animal, I'd be: Platypus
If I were a direction, I'd be: Southwest
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: a love seat
If I were a liquid, I'd be: piss
If I were a tree, I'd be: money tree
If I were a bird, I'd be: Seagul, just so i could shit on you.
If I were a tool, I'd be: a dick.
If I were a flower/plant, I'd be: Robert Plant
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: Hurricane
If I were a season, I'd be: Fall
If I were a mythical creature, I'd be: A Vampire
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be: a triangle
If I were a measurement, I'd be: a milimetre
If I were a street sign, I'd be: "SLIPPERY WHEN WET"
If I were a color, I'd be: brown
If I were an emotion, I'd be: deathness
If I were a [fruit], I'd be: gay
If I were a sound, I'd be: a burp
If I were a font, I'd be: Wingding
If I were an element, I'd be: Fire
If I were a song, I'd be: "Spade" - Marilyn Manson
If I were a picture, I'd be: still
If I were a movie, I'd be: Party Monster
If I were a place, I'd be: The Backseat
If I were a material, I'd be: Mesh
If I were a language, I'd be: Swedish
If I were a meal, I'd be: Halloween Cupcakes
If I were a utensil, I'd be: a spork
If I were a food I'd be: mashed potatoes
If I were a scent, I'd be: store-bought dirt
If I were a word, I'd be: muckluck
If I were a curse word, I'd be: cock
If I were an object, I'd be: tub stopper
If I were a body part, I'd be: The Big Toe
If I were a subject in school, I'd be: Lunch
If I were a shape, I'd be: Hexagon
If I were a symbol, I'd be: A Star
If I were punctuation, I'd be: !
If I were a letter, I'd be: X
If I were a number, I'd be : 666
If I were an article of clothing, I'd be: Undies