(no subject)
So here is my new random thought. How many rumors are there that are circulating about me. I started thinking about this today, when every where I turned I heard different stories abut a certian individual. Some of the things I heard were absoultly rediculous and from a very unreliable source. But then I started to think about it and if I was not aware of the entire story (which I still may not know all of it) I would think that this person was abosultly horrible. Knowing what I do though, I know that it isn't true, but at the same there are some elements of the things that this individual was saying that seems as though they could be true, and it wasn't the first time that I had heard them. So that is the question, what should you believe. It also has me thinking of my first question. With all of the ways that I have fucked up my life lately, what is being said about me when I am not around.
I have dif. changed a lot,or at least I am attempting to, but not enough that I think that I should be getting comments like "you sound like your in a better place tonight". What in the hell is that. UGGG. If that is what is being said to me though, what is being said at other times. Why is it also that when I am really trying hard to forget, everything that I do and everyone that I talk to seems to be determined to keep the thoughts in the forefront. Every time that it seems as though I may be moving along, there is something new to remind me and to seemingly stab the wound back open. Why I even care most of the time I do not know, anyways that is enough of that. On a happy note, I went to the gym tonight for the first time in forever and I feel like death now, but I am also really excited about it. It feels good, and is dif. something that I need to do much more often cuz I am so out of shape.
I have dif. changed a lot,or at least I am attempting to, but not enough that I think that I should be getting comments like "you sound like your in a better place tonight". What in the hell is that. UGGG. If that is what is being said to me though, what is being said at other times. Why is it also that when I am really trying hard to forget, everything that I do and everyone that I talk to seems to be determined to keep the thoughts in the forefront. Every time that it seems as though I may be moving along, there is something new to remind me and to seemingly stab the wound back open. Why I even care most of the time I do not know, anyways that is enough of that. On a happy note, I went to the gym tonight for the first time in forever and I feel like death now, but I am also really excited about it. It feels good, and is dif. something that I need to do much more often cuz I am so out of shape.