the end is the beginning in the end
So, I put an end to it today; tomorrow I quit sixflags.
I'm so happy I can enjoy life again, or for the first time possibly. A few years ago I thought that nothing could ever work the way I wanted, or at least that in my case the pursuit of happiness was well more than pointless. I've made my own luck, always have, it's only now however that I'm willing to accepted that I've made my own losses as well. From that time in ninth grade, to the first time I bombed a term paper and blamed it on my ideals being far to radical. I started holding myself accountable for my actions I think four years ago, but still never accepted the true level of control I hold over my world. I'm ready now... I can deal with the responsibility of dropping all the cop-outs and just dealing with my problems; Or simply not creating them. I don't think I've ever been ungrateful, but at times I have been a coward, or at least hid myself in my own ignorance.
I've never understood that about people, the desire to just hide from things, profound or insignificant; Why ignore something when everything is at your accord? God/ the Flying Spaghetti Monster, is everywhere and in everything we do, why forsake the greatest gift we as humans were all granted? The simple ability to make a choice or a stand one way or another. The fact that we can war, hate, or love the very essence of what keeps us apart all the while still bringing us together in our magnificence. Sadness and sorrow, loss, the pain of longing for something, the twenty minuets that feels like a decade on a Tuesday afternoon while a beautiful piece of music plays in the background and the way you break down completely just because you can breath and love; because you have felt all that you have so far in your life. I've been blessed with so much, and have taken it all for granted for far to long.
To everyone aforementioned, and everyone who's not been thank you for loving me.
If you're reading this for no reason, thanks for sharing this with me, whether or not either of us ever knows it is of no consequence.
Live life and be beautiful, you always have been, so start accepting it.
I'm so happy I can enjoy life again, or for the first time possibly. A few years ago I thought that nothing could ever work the way I wanted, or at least that in my case the pursuit of happiness was well more than pointless. I've made my own luck, always have, it's only now however that I'm willing to accepted that I've made my own losses as well. From that time in ninth grade, to the first time I bombed a term paper and blamed it on my ideals being far to radical. I started holding myself accountable for my actions I think four years ago, but still never accepted the true level of control I hold over my world. I'm ready now... I can deal with the responsibility of dropping all the cop-outs and just dealing with my problems; Or simply not creating them. I don't think I've ever been ungrateful, but at times I have been a coward, or at least hid myself in my own ignorance.
I've never understood that about people, the desire to just hide from things, profound or insignificant; Why ignore something when everything is at your accord? God/ the Flying Spaghetti Monster, is everywhere and in everything we do, why forsake the greatest gift we as humans were all granted? The simple ability to make a choice or a stand one way or another. The fact that we can war, hate, or love the very essence of what keeps us apart all the while still bringing us together in our magnificence. Sadness and sorrow, loss, the pain of longing for something, the twenty minuets that feels like a decade on a Tuesday afternoon while a beautiful piece of music plays in the background and the way you break down completely just because you can breath and love; because you have felt all that you have so far in your life. I've been blessed with so much, and have taken it all for granted for far to long.
To everyone aforementioned, and everyone who's not been thank you for loving me.
If you're reading this for no reason, thanks for sharing this with me, whether or not either of us ever knows it is of no consequence.
Live life and be beautiful, you always have been, so start accepting it.