today i feel gross.
i woke up this morning, and thought, "ugh, i feel like shit." and for a minute, i thought, maybe i'm hungover. but seriously, i had two beers, what the fuck. and then i realized, no, i have a headache and my stomach hurts, and this is because god is stripping the inside of my uterus with a rusty paint-scraper.
haaaaate.
i started vaguely planning my gender outlaw piece. i have a poem i need to do some work on, too. slacker, slacker. i'm not gonna get much done today, i feel like shit.
in other real life news, apparently fixing things is not working. i don't know -- i'm past the really upset stage, i'm just... disappointed, i guess. do i really seem that horribly unhappy? despite everything, i've been keeping my head up. the monster in my skull's been quiet the past few months, just a whisper as long as i remember to take my meds. i went through a rough period a while ago because i wasn't taking my meds, couldn't seem to remember, but now that i'm keeping my dose where it should be, i'm in a really good place. june is just a rough time for me, always is, probably always will be, but as it gets further away, i get better.
i don't know. dwelling on it is probably not healthy, and i do have other stuff to do today besides feeling sorry for myself. time to concentrate on the here and now in life, instead of the stuff i can't fix or change.
grant me the serenity, etc., blah blah.
haaaaate.
i started vaguely planning my gender outlaw piece. i have a poem i need to do some work on, too. slacker, slacker. i'm not gonna get much done today, i feel like shit.
in other real life news, apparently fixing things is not working. i don't know -- i'm past the really upset stage, i'm just... disappointed, i guess. do i really seem that horribly unhappy? despite everything, i've been keeping my head up. the monster in my skull's been quiet the past few months, just a whisper as long as i remember to take my meds. i went through a rough period a while ago because i wasn't taking my meds, couldn't seem to remember, but now that i'm keeping my dose where it should be, i'm in a really good place. june is just a rough time for me, always is, probably always will be, but as it gets further away, i get better.
i don't know. dwelling on it is probably not healthy, and i do have other stuff to do today besides feeling sorry for myself. time to concentrate on the here and now in life, instead of the stuff i can't fix or change.
grant me the serenity, etc., blah blah.