So it goes
Derby for Kimmy and I is coming to an end. It's been an overwhelming positive experience, but also a very time consuming experience. We've built the team up from nothing with some old friends and some new friends. We've had some of the most fun I've ever had and it is by far one of the things I'm proudest of having done. The downside has been dealing with fucktards and people I wouldn't walk across the street to piss on if they were on fire. But, the plus side is that I got to do something and build something with my wife, my sister and several of my closest friends. I got to see a side of my wife I'd never have gotten to see otherwise. I'm going to miss seeing her play, she was unbelievable. I'm going to miss yelling at girls in short skirts and fishnets too. They don't allow you to do that at strip clubs. I've tried.
We're leaving because, as I said, it's simply too time consuming. We've been doing it for three years and in that time, we've not focused enough on other things such as writing and music. I'm starting one of those old-guys-playing-sloppy-drunk-rock'n'roll type bands. I've also been writing some alt-country songs for Kim to sing. We're totally stuck up each others' asses like that.
I've also begun to map out a new novel. But, my writing is rusty and looking back at older things I've written, I think my style of writing or at least thinking has changed significantly. Right now, I feel my writing has no voice.
Whoever I was when I was 25 is some character floating around in stories people tell and this journal. I'm older now, calmer. I would say less misanthropic and argumentative. But, it may just be that I learned to be content so I don't need to fight everything any longer. Perhaps it is that and a bit of laziness as well.
Aldous Huxley said he wanted to change the world but in the end learned he could only change himself. Perhaps the same is true about destroying the world and learning in the end you can only destroy yourself.
We're leaving because, as I said, it's simply too time consuming. We've been doing it for three years and in that time, we've not focused enough on other things such as writing and music. I'm starting one of those old-guys-playing-sloppy-drunk-rock'n'roll type bands. I've also been writing some alt-country songs for Kim to sing. We're totally stuck up each others' asses like that.
I've also begun to map out a new novel. But, my writing is rusty and looking back at older things I've written, I think my style of writing or at least thinking has changed significantly. Right now, I feel my writing has no voice.
Whoever I was when I was 25 is some character floating around in stories people tell and this journal. I'm older now, calmer. I would say less misanthropic and argumentative. But, it may just be that I learned to be content so I don't need to fight everything any longer. Perhaps it is that and a bit of laziness as well.
Aldous Huxley said he wanted to change the world but in the end learned he could only change himself. Perhaps the same is true about destroying the world and learning in the end you can only destroy yourself.