Today is a beautiful day
Humans are social creatures - I read about those sentiments in one of my textbooks yesterday. While this isn’t a newsflash, this point has never been illustrated so vividly to me until the past few days. I don’t think I really, fully grasped this point until now.
I was the resident advisor (R.A.) on duty at my dormitory from Wed. 1 p.m. to Fri. 10 p.m. - that’s 57 hours, I believe. Basically, for 57 hours, I had to be inside of the building (though I could take breaks here and there) and be available and on-call for residents during that period of spring break. What made it very challenging were a few factors, which were all interrelated:
*I hadn’t seen my boyfriend since Friday the 20th (You can read more about it at this previous entry), and, through no fault of his own, the only time I heard from him was on Sunday through an e-mail and a couple of other quick messages that day. He and I see, or at least communicate with, each other regularly, so it was hard to suddenly go “cold turkey.”
*The dorm was probably about 1/6 full because a lot of people had gone on vacation or went back home, so it was pretty empty. On one hand, it was nice to have some peace and quiet (which made my job as a R.A. a lot easier), as well as more privacy (no competition for the showers, for instance). On the other hand, sometimes it was too quiet, and it would have been nice to have more interaction with people, more liveliness in the building.
*To occupy my time and mind (and to free up my weekend a little bit), I spent a majority of my shift working on stuff for my dorm or doing homework (which I had a lot of - and still do). Out of all of the rooms on the first floor that I could do my work, I chose the office because of its convenience - and definitely not for its comfort.
*Often, when I am alone (and I am an introverted person and like to have some “alone time”) and/or when I need a break, I go outside and get some fresh air. A change in scenery usually helps relieve some stress. Plus, I receive some degree of human contact, even if it’s just from people watching. I attend a university in an urban environment, but it is nice to walk around in it. Plus, the weather is usually very sunny, and it definitely was beautiful this week. During my 57-hour shift, altogether, I think I only went out of the house for about 5 hours altogether with huge gaps in between those breaks.
I don’t think I’ve ever had a personal experience quite like this before, and to say that I felt stressed during the past few days would be an understatement. By Thursday night (if not earlier), I could feel my body and mind wearing down.
It’s hard enough for me to relax in general as it is, and if given the situation, I could be a workaholic, and that was the mode I was in - and it definitely wasn’t fun. Some of my muscles were tensed and ached from being in the same seated position for so long. I probably should have taken more breaks, even just to stretch and walk around the house, but I felt like I had to keep myself busy and get stuff done - even if that involved getting a few hours of sleep on Wednesday night, for example. While I didn’t exactly have headaches, I would sometimes experience these rushes of pressure to my head and have what felt like anxiety attacks (I can’t imagine what my blood pressure has been like recently). I had so much trouble sleeping Thursday night that I even vented a little by leaving a crazy voice message on my boyfriend’s cell phone at 1 a.m.
All in all, I ultimate ended up yearning for human interaction, mostly from my boyfriend but it eventually became just any kind of extended interaction, even if it was just instant messaging different people (Hey, I was in front of my laptop constantly). I would find happiness in such things, and any bright spots during the past few days would seem even brighter. It was refreshing to eat a meal with a few people while someone else covered for me at the dorm for a couple hours. Pleasant one-on-one conversations with different people were appreciated. While those situations may have seemed insignificant to the others involved, those moments meant so much to me in my situation. Besides human interaction, actions like reading a newspaper or sitting on the patio for half hour were so wonderful.
As my shift waned down last night, my mind became clearer: A sense of calm set in, partially because I finally did communicate with my boyfriend briefly and also because I spent my last couple of hours just relaxing on a couch and chatting with one of the residents of the dorm. It was like I was gradually being release.
I was free.
From this experience, I learned that I have taken some things for granted. While I don’t think I’ve taken my boyfriend for granted, I learned to appreciate even more the time that we do spend together - and we’ll finally see each other in person in a matter of hours!
I learned the importance of taking a break and balancing work with relaxation. I learned the importance of sunlight, fresh air, and just being outside.
Ultimately, I learned that humans are social creatures.