part ii - the "what's wrong with kids/parents today?" part.
If you read my post from the other night, you would've heard a reiteration of my "bars suck" policy. it's a policy i stand behing 100%. bars/clubs suck, and if you make a habit of going to them on a regular (pathetic) basis, odds are pretty good that you suck too.
in that post, i meditated on what reason a young lady might have for dancing on a counter at said bar covered only in a towel, like she just got out of the shower - a pretty sad excuse for a halloween costume, if not a glaring example of low self-respect/esteem. but that's just my interpretation.
That leads me into a new thought: why does Halloween, arguably the most fun of all non-holidays, also become the best holiday representation of how much people suck ass?
Evdence:
While Regina itself was moderately calm (calm being six candy-thefts being reported to the police) on All-Hallow's Eve, the rest of the province was smothered underneath a blanket of pure evil. Moose Jaw police answered 44 calls. The most serious incident was when a parent reportedly found razor blades inside their child's candy bag. Another incident of note saw police dealing with a knife wielding, 20 year old suicidal man who ended up being taken into custody without incident and sent to the psych ward at Moose Jaw Union hospital. Three vehicles, a garage and a couch were set on fire as the already troublesome hoodlums of "the Jaw" became possessed by the unadulterated spirit of evil that only appears on this most evil of days.
Meanwhile, in Saskatoon, an unprecedented level of chaos came to pass. There were the standard candy robbers, with seven being reported so far. Two of those robberies, it's worth noting, weredone at knifepoint. One of the knife-wielding suspects was apprehended; he's eleven. After a stern talking to, he went to his cell without supper and the officers confiscated his candy.
At one home, a drunk-ass man decided he would really treat the kids, and started handing outunopened cans of beer. He'll no doubt be charged with something, although i hear the kids of his neighbourhood will be starting a petition to get him exonerated and named "coolest neighbour ever.".
And, finally, my personal favourites: in one Saskatoon neighbourhood, a resident sees an ambulance pull over at the side of the road. It doesn't seem to be all that noteworthy...until a 16 year old girl gets out of the passenger-side door. That person called the police, and the girl was nabbed. One can only assume she stopped by the beer-givers house and couldn't handle her can. Tied for the first place spot was a young fellow who stopped at a house, only to be told that they've run out of candy. So the genius decided to force his way into the house, attempts to choke the owner, and demands that they give him candy.
That's your evidence. I can only imagine that on a hemisphere-wide census, incidents like this would turn up even more frequently than any of us would dare to imagine possible. Of course, we could blame the usual suspects: bad parenting, violence in movies/tv/video games, and fast food-induced gassiness. I for one feel much more comfortable in solely blaming the spirits of long-dead native Canadians/buffalo that were murdered in order to make way for European settlers. I feel more comfortable doing this because if i had any less faith in the goodness that's supposed to be inherent in people i just might lose it completely.