(no subject)
I was watching the end of 'Mrs. Doubtfire,' and to be honest, it put me in a real sentimental mood, so I was planning on giving a heartfelt post about life and what it means to little old me, but I think there are more pressing issues at hand.
As per usual, I got up this morning and fired up the dial up to read over all my past journal entries, because I am an egotistical bastard, and I noticed that some of you more conservatives types might label me as, 'crazy,' for what I write.
Instead of accepting this label, like I did for the first twenty years of my life when I lived in that hospital, I decided to prove that I am in fact massivly sane by adding examples of my writing outside of the live journal here on my live journal, there by making them writing in my live journal.
The first is from an e-mail I wrote to a friend. Feel the sanity!
Shoeless Joe Jackson,
Sorry I haven't been "up on my e-mail" lately. I saw you had sent me a few,
but I was too afraid too look at them after reading in my horoscope that I
would "have problems." Oddly, the horoscope ended there, leaving it uncharacteristically vague. Since I was unsure what problems I would encounter, I locked myself in my closet and lived off fingernail clippings and old sweaters for a couple of days. Man, was my horoscope right, cause that caused A LOT of problems.
Have you found your bank card? I still don't have it, if that's what you're wondering, but if you're wondering what it would be like to see elves riding down volcanoes on Abercrombie catalogs, then we have our selves a real coincidence, because so am I.
Did you know that Capri Sun spelled backwards is Nusirpac? It could mean
nothing, but if it means something, then we should find out what that
'something' is. I suggest you learn ancienct sandscript and see if it
translates into some demi-god like name, and I will check the names of the cast for the 'West Wing' for a match.
Have a good weekend.
Joe Jackson's shoe
Here are a few daily affirmations I had while sitting under an oak tree.
Isn't life weird. One day you're king of the tech support mountain, wearing a headset of gold and sitting on a swivel chair of Charmin, and the next your bumping knees with some young college co-ed named Dean, writing on a stained two year old
notebook in some unventilated classroom instructed by Mr. Prickly Sourpuss. Life's weird like that I tell ya...WEIRD!
It has been brought to my attention that if you salute a man while in
military duty, it is a sign of respect, but if you salute a man in jeans and
a sweatshirt on your way to class, it is a smartass gesture. Forgive me for
trying to be dignified.
If you like classic movies, and you're a guy, it means you're gay. No heterosexual man can like any movie made before the year he was born; however, there are a few notable exceptions, such as, 'The Godfather I and II, Rocky, any movie about war, or any movie that has Clint Eastwood. While many people think Citizen Kane is part of the list, it is actually in the category where you can watch it, but you can't enjoy it.
Good sanity abounds. What more can I say? Now if you'll all excuse me, I have to go dress up like Cindy Lauper and steal kids from a day care center.
As per usual, I got up this morning and fired up the dial up to read over all my past journal entries, because I am an egotistical bastard, and I noticed that some of you more conservatives types might label me as, 'crazy,' for what I write.
Instead of accepting this label, like I did for the first twenty years of my life when I lived in that hospital, I decided to prove that I am in fact massivly sane by adding examples of my writing outside of the live journal here on my live journal, there by making them writing in my live journal.
The first is from an e-mail I wrote to a friend. Feel the sanity!
Shoeless Joe Jackson,
Sorry I haven't been "up on my e-mail" lately. I saw you had sent me a few,
but I was too afraid too look at them after reading in my horoscope that I
would "have problems." Oddly, the horoscope ended there, leaving it uncharacteristically vague. Since I was unsure what problems I would encounter, I locked myself in my closet and lived off fingernail clippings and old sweaters for a couple of days. Man, was my horoscope right, cause that caused A LOT of problems.
Have you found your bank card? I still don't have it, if that's what you're wondering, but if you're wondering what it would be like to see elves riding down volcanoes on Abercrombie catalogs, then we have our selves a real coincidence, because so am I.
Did you know that Capri Sun spelled backwards is Nusirpac? It could mean
nothing, but if it means something, then we should find out what that
'something' is. I suggest you learn ancienct sandscript and see if it
translates into some demi-god like name, and I will check the names of the cast for the 'West Wing' for a match.
Have a good weekend.
Joe Jackson's shoe
Here are a few daily affirmations I had while sitting under an oak tree.
Isn't life weird. One day you're king of the tech support mountain, wearing a headset of gold and sitting on a swivel chair of Charmin, and the next your bumping knees with some young college co-ed named Dean, writing on a stained two year old
notebook in some unventilated classroom instructed by Mr. Prickly Sourpuss. Life's weird like that I tell ya...WEIRD!
It has been brought to my attention that if you salute a man while in
military duty, it is a sign of respect, but if you salute a man in jeans and
a sweatshirt on your way to class, it is a smartass gesture. Forgive me for
trying to be dignified.
If you like classic movies, and you're a guy, it means you're gay. No heterosexual man can like any movie made before the year he was born; however, there are a few notable exceptions, such as, 'The Godfather I and II, Rocky, any movie about war, or any movie that has Clint Eastwood. While many people think Citizen Kane is part of the list, it is actually in the category where you can watch it, but you can't enjoy it.
Good sanity abounds. What more can I say? Now if you'll all excuse me, I have to go dress up like Cindy Lauper and steal kids from a day care center.