4 years, darts, and getting dumped
It's right around 4 years to the day that I've been in Japan. I say "around" because according to my journal, I left North America on the morning of the 11th. You could call it either the 12th or the 13th as far as when I arrived. I suppose technically I should use the time zone I landed in, which would be the 13th. Time zones are fun. When I travel to the US from Japan (well, the one time I went back since I got here), it's about a 12 to 15 hour flight, yet it's possible to land before I left according to the time and date.
So what's changed in 4 years? Chitose has changed quite a bit for the better. When I got here, there was nothing. It was a almost a ghost town. There were a lot of closed shops, abandoned buildings, no places to go but snack bars in the evening. There was an old shopping mall sort of thing in the middle of town that was empty with boarded up windows and broken concrete out front. There are still a lot of closed stores, but a lot have opened up in those empty locations. The mall sort of thing is filled with stores again, including a bookstore (and DVDs and music) in the basement. There are still a lot of snack bars, maybe even more than there were, but I understand them a bit better now- I've even work in one on occasion. They were a very strange concept to my western mind, and they're probably good material for a journal entry all on their own which I might get around to someday. There are also some other places that have opened up, like the darts bars.
I was never much of a drinker in the States. I still don't drink that much or that often (though students at parties claim I'm a strong drinker because I'm still able to walk when they can hardly move), but I do go to the darts bar quite often. Before I got Nana, I'd been going at least twice a week, sometimes 3 or 4 times. For one thing, it was the first place I really got a chance to try speaking Japanese, and it's where I get a lot of my speaking practice. The staff was friendly and patient with my language skills, and would actually try to converse with me. Also, the food is really good. D-Planet has the best pizza I've had in Japan (which isn't saying much) and ranks among the top pizzas I've had anywhere (which is saying something; I've been to Italy). Nowadays I go once a week with the Wednesday night regulars, and sometimes pop in on a weekend. I never acquired a taste for beer, I generally drink Smirnoff Ice, some of the rum or gin drinks, or sake. Since I moved 6 km out of town, however, the mainstay has been mango juice. Japan has a zero tolerance on drinking and driving; it's not something I would do anyway. During the summer when I sometimes took my mountain bike to work, I would have a couple of drinks and then bike home. Japan also has a zero tolerance law on drinking and biking, but in this case I figure behind the wheel of a car I would end up killing someone else; on a bike, it's pretty much just my own stupid neck at risk.
What else has changed? I'm... calmer about some things now. Like when I get dumped by a girlfriend. There have been times when the depression (if you want to use that word) lasted longer than the relationship did. Now, yeah, it still sucks, but I deal with it better. I rebound faster, I get over it, I move on. Maybe I write a song, like I did after Hitomi. Now, I'm not musically inclined. I don't play any instruments; I can play "Oh Susanna" on the harmonica, and pluck out the beginning of the Star Wars theme on the guitar, but that's about it. And I do want to say that the day she broke up with me, I'd had a headache all day which turned out to be the beginning symptoms of a nasty thing that took me out of work for a week: headache, stomach ache, coughing, sore throat, runny nose, inability to sleep, and the feeling like I was going to puke. I didn't, but kept a bucket by my bed for 3 days just in case. Doctors in Japan suck, he said I had a cold and diarrhea- the only symptoms I didn't have were the runs. So I was legitimately sick at the time. Although getting dumped probably didn't help my recovery time, I don't usually manifest such physical symptoms from heartache. And with those disclaimers, here's the song I wrote:
I looked at my life since you left me
I changed all the art on my walls
I threw out the jacket that you didn't like
and the shirt that smelled worst of all.
But the first things to go
were my heart and my soul;
Without you, they'd no place in my life.
'Cuz you see, my dear, that without you here
Like my plants, they just withered and died.
I cleaned up the back of my fish tank.
I scraped the green scum off the sides.
I put down the lid on the toilet for you,
And then I sat down, and I cried.
Cuz the first things to go
were my heart and my soul.
They went down my freshly cleaned drain.
I just want you to know that I cleaned out the mold.
Here, in my house of pain.
I washed all of my dirty dishes.
I defrosted my freezer, it's true.
I took out the garbage, I ironed my socks;
But I still can't stop thinking of you. (Alternate line: I wish I could defrost you, too)
Yeah the first things to go
were my heart and my soul.
Now there's just a vacuum where you were.
Don't take that the wrong way,
I'm just trying to say...
That it sucks.
I think what bugs me the most now about having been dumped in Japan is that I got the same breakup line, proving that it is a universal female thing to use the "F" word when breaking up with a guy. Yes, regardless of language, you will be told you are liked "as a friend." And that she "really really likes you, but doesn't love you." Somewhere out there, the descendants of the first woman to use those lines and get a copyright on it are living quite comfortably on the worldwide royalties and licensing fees. Who was she? I think the breakup speech is older than dirt. It was probably Lucy the Australopithecus. (Note to self: my language skills can't be degrading that badly. I spelled "Australopithecus" correctly without having to look it up.) The most recent ex-girlfriend didn't even speak English, and the "F" word came out. Dating her did wonders for my Japanese, I was sad to see her go for that reason alone, though there were quite a few other reasons, too.
Well, enough for now. I think I'm going to go to the darts bar for a celebratory pizza.