The Great Divide
This is where I stand.
On the edge of a canyon whose mouth seems to stretch out for eternity.
There is no going back.
There is nothing but a barren wasteland behind me.
-Me
I don't know where I stand. I'm beginning to wonder what I stand for. Maybe I should just sit down already.
I'm tired. I'm tired of monotony, and tired of being afraid. Afraid of taking risks, of putting myself out there, even of speaking my mind. My voice has gotten more and more silent this past year. But fear is debilitating; it exhausts me as much as repetitive boredom. Everyone says take risks. It's so easy to see that that's my only real choice in life, lest I amount to nothing.
Easy to see it, yes, but not easy to do something about it.
This feeling of an abyss in front of me began when I graduated college. I thought, "Shit. Now I have to make decisions that will affect me for the rest of my life. I have to be in the real world, find a job that I enjoy, and am qualified for" (which is about as easy as fitting a grapefruit into a gerbil's mouth. Yes, I made that up just now).
I no longer look forward to the future. I dwell on happy memories, and fantasies. That's it. The idea of planning my future makes me almost nauseous. I know I'm gonna have to wake up and do something about it eventually.
Listen as the wind blows
From across the great divide.
Voices trapped in yearning,
Memories trapped in time.
The night is my companion
And solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here
And not be satisfied?....
Into this night I wander
Its morning that I dread
Another day of knowing of
The path I fear to tread.
Into this sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride....
Yeah, I know, I'm leaving out the last line. But that line reeks of passion and self-determination.
Cause nothing stands between us here
And I won’t be denied.
-Sarah McLachlan
On the edge of a canyon whose mouth seems to stretch out for eternity.
There is no going back.
There is nothing but a barren wasteland behind me.
-Me
I don't know where I stand. I'm beginning to wonder what I stand for. Maybe I should just sit down already.
I'm tired. I'm tired of monotony, and tired of being afraid. Afraid of taking risks, of putting myself out there, even of speaking my mind. My voice has gotten more and more silent this past year. But fear is debilitating; it exhausts me as much as repetitive boredom. Everyone says take risks. It's so easy to see that that's my only real choice in life, lest I amount to nothing.
Easy to see it, yes, but not easy to do something about it.
This feeling of an abyss in front of me began when I graduated college. I thought, "Shit. Now I have to make decisions that will affect me for the rest of my life. I have to be in the real world, find a job that I enjoy, and am qualified for" (which is about as easy as fitting a grapefruit into a gerbil's mouth. Yes, I made that up just now).
I no longer look forward to the future. I dwell on happy memories, and fantasies. That's it. The idea of planning my future makes me almost nauseous. I know I'm gonna have to wake up and do something about it eventually.
Listen as the wind blows
From across the great divide.
Voices trapped in yearning,
Memories trapped in time.
The night is my companion
And solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here
And not be satisfied?....
Into this night I wander
Its morning that I dread
Another day of knowing of
The path I fear to tread.
Into this sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride....
Yeah, I know, I'm leaving out the last line. But that line reeks of passion and self-determination.
Cause nothing stands between us here
And I won’t be denied.
-Sarah McLachlan