017 | Video

[ebony_mask]

[Black Mask is sitting in a leather office chair, petting a kitten: a pink Siamese with gold eyes, a gray-white blotch of fur on its face, and black ears and tail. The animal curled up in his lap looks quite pleased to be there--the obvious mutual affection may be unnerving.]I lost custody of my goddamn sea monkeys, and my elf is a sex slave, so I

Comments

[video]

[whoisjohnsmith]

What the...?

Why do things like this never happen to me?! A skull-faced guy selling a pink cat?!

permavideo

[ebony_mask]

It could happen to you, little girl.

For the right price.

[whoisjohnsmith]

What, you can make me into a skull-faced person too? ...I think it might be fun, but only for a couple of days. Unless you've got some other kind of powers beneath that!

What's the right price right now, anyway?

[ebony_mask]

...I can make that happen.

[Totally ignoring the rest.]

[whoisjohnsmith]

Well, you didn't even answer if it came with any cool powers! It looks kind of like it's hard to talk...

[ebony_mask]

If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

[A pause.]

We talkin' about the cat or me?

[whoisjohnsmith]

...Wow, well, that was certainly the correct response!

I was talking about you, but same questions apply to the cat. Though I've already hung out with a talking orange cat...

[ebony_mask]

Oh, well, then, the same answer applies.

As for the cat, hell if I know. Let's go with loves to take baths and understands English and is clearly a mutant.

[whoisjohnsmith]

Hmm... I think you're going to have a hard time getting five hundred dollars for that.

[ebony_mask]

Go big or go home, little girl.

[whoisjohnsmith]

That's exactly what I'm saying! How is this pink cat big?

[ebony_mask]

[As much of a frown as he can muster.]

You gonna buy this cat or not?

[whoisjohnsmith]

You just haven't given me a reason to! I can spray-paint a cat pink if I want to, you know.