Supernatural Fic: Abandoned

[sirenprincess]

I swear I'm working on some other more dramatic hurt/comfort Supernatural stories. One in particular I'm working on is Dean helping Sam with his demon blood withdrawal. But those get intense, and sometimes I need a break. A friend asked for a gift fic, and sometimes those just write themselves. Here's what my fever-induced brain wrote now.

Comments

Abandoned

[catsintheattic]

What moved me most about this story was how John called Caleb "son". Like he knew exactly what was going on with Caleb and how much he was suffering.

And of course Caleb's own story was the perfect trauma to be triggered by the events of the hunt, with his fear of Sam and Dean losing their dad just like he has lost his dad.

I don't want to imagine the impact this might have had on Sam and Dean. Especially Sam must have been terrified. And Dean, poor Dean ...

... I just read your answer to reapertownusa about how John's threat to leave Caleb must have played into Dean's abandonment issues. That's so harsh, but it comes across as very true to all the characters.

Being beaten meant John hadn't given up on him, wasn't going to abandon him yet. There's so much room for so many twisted things to go on in Dean's head here.

Damn ... now you have my mind reeling with possibilities. *swallows hard*

Re: Abandoned

[sirenprincess]

Aww, thank you so much for reading, dear. I think John didn't really understand Caleb before this point. He was just a really young hunter that seemed to want to hang around John. But once Caleb finally broke down and let some of his story out, John understood a lot more. I'm glad you appreciated the comfort John was trying to provide for Caleb

Re: Abandoned

[catsintheattic]

I think I'm going to write a coda from Dean's point of view. I know what's going on in his head, I just need to write it out.SQUEEEEEE

Re: Abandoned

[sirenprincess]

I have the impression that a lot of things he did to the boys weren't exactly planned. AND He is such a physical man and tends to overlook emotions.
THIS! That's totally how I see John. It's not that he's cruel and uncaring; it's just that he doesn't realize what emotional impact his actions will have on the boys. I see that in his actions in the first season, when he just disappears on Dean for logistics reasons with safety and the demon, but doesn't even think about what doing it that way is going to do emotionally to Dean.

I can imagine Dean feeling already guilty when he gets punished
I think Dean punishes himself so severely internally that honestly John never even needs to do anything besides mention that he's displeased with Dean, and Dean is punished. I try to make that come across in my stories. Particularly Scorch Marks.

And on top of the guilt, I can see him being so damn thankful for the whipping, simply because it means that his dad still hasn't given up on him. THIS is exactly what I'm going for with Abandoned.

Re: Abandoned

[catsintheattic]

Dean's guilty feeling clearly comes across in Scorch Marks. His self-punishment is so high that I really wish John would see what is going on in Dean's head. And part of the drama of the story is exactly about knowing that John will never realise the amount of Dean's internal suffering, or his fear of being abandoned.

And I fully second what you said about John being too obsessed with other things to notice. He is not a cruel dad, only, apart from keeping the boys physically safe, his mind simply isn't very firmly on the job of being a dad.

THIS is exactly what I'm going for with Abandoned. I hope I can bring it across more in the sequels.

That's awesome. I'm really looking forward to the sequels, because this is exactly what I would love to see explored in great detail.