Gay pubs, Gentleman's clubs, suicide bombers and a classic email
Right where did I leave off? Ah yes my hectic all over the place current lifestyle. Last Friday was a good diverse night. Me and James (the guy Loulou thinks is homophobic) arranged to go out for a few beers after work. He suggested a place in Charing Cross called the Retro Bar. We had a few drinks and a natter and he said ‘there seems to be a lot of gay people in here, I wonder why?’
This confused us for some time until I went to the toilet and in there was a sign that said that Eurovision was being televised in there - sponsored by Stonewall. Underneath this it said ‘The Retro bar, the only gay alternative!’ I found all this very amusing and the irony is not lost on me (btw I do not think he is a homophobe).
After a few drinks I went to meet Loulou and we walked to Whitehall to go The Savage Club. http://www.savageclub.com Fetjames had invited us as he is a member somehow, he was very blasé about it but we realized he must be secretly very posh - it is apparently one of London’s leading Bohemian Gentleman’s clubs. I was very excited it sounded just my thing (I am going to try and get accepted as a member, if I can wangle it!) We met up with him there along with Doulos and a couple of his posh work colleagues. It was good fun but I was disappointed to see no one with a handlebar moustaches or people who are like the Major from Faulty Towers. The place was empty. We left at 9 - got drunk in Covent Garden and ended up in a Chinese restaurant in China Town.
Saturday after we finally managed to drag ourselves away from sensual deviancy we went to view a flat in Upper Clapton. I sank into a depression as soon as I saw it - it was beautiful and I can’t see us getting it. I’m not enjoying this flat searching at all, everything seems an anti climax once you have seen one place you really like and you just end up feeling like your going to settle for something you will never be happy with.
After that we went to Broadway Market. God I hate that place and my depression funneled quite neatly into intense hatred and anger at all the people there. It is just full of media nodes and poncey twats swanning about and just being generally irritating (you know the ones - the Nathan Barley Shoreditch trendy people). I was surly for the rest of the day until we got in later on and opened a bottle of champagne.
With the weather being so glorious on Sunday we decided to walk into town to catch the sun and just relax. Surreal moment of the day came when we were on the south bank and saw http://www.budgieman.co.uk/ a traditional British eccentric performing with budgies.
It gave me a headache, but thankfully at this point Fetjames called to say he was meeting Doulos in Camden town if we fancied it. After much debate over what pub to settle in we had a great debate about most subjects (with Fetjames this is usually based on the arts or left wing politics v right wing politics). Not sure how the everyday subject of suicide bombers came about but Fetjames advanced the interesting, unique and I suspect controversial theory that terrorism is best defeated by…terrorism. Arguing that suicide bombings are a shock tactic but if random people just started doing them all the time, then the terrorist would not be able to use them as a shock tactic and it would completely demean their objectives - who cares what their cause or ethos is when it has no more of an effect than Graham from Dunny-on-the-Wold detonates himself in a garden centre. They would lose all impact; I have to say I could see where he was going with this.
Quote of the day was by me when someone pointed out that the French had several warehouses full of Francs just in case the Euro failed, at which point I quipped ‘I thought you were going to say they had warehouses stockpiled with white flags in case a war broke out’; sometimes the French are too easy.
Last night was fun, got wrecked on cocktails in happy hour in Fitzrovia - happy hour starting at 4pm till the disconcertingly vague time of ‘late’ but I will update that another time, I’m shattered and need to retire for the evening. Yep I still haven't got round to plauging your journals with my comments, I may even take a day off work just to do it so be warned! anyway I will leave you with this gem below.
A lad at work used to work at Central London Authority and one of his mates who still works there forwarded him this email that the Chief Executive that was sent to all staff. I thought I would end with this because it is so funny.
“I have been informed that there is a possibility the building will run out of soap and toilet tissue by the end of the week.
I am aware that soap has already run out in the gents by Spur G, but I have been promised that supplies will arrive tomorrow.
If it doesn't arrive, I will be calling in Environmental Health, so please rest assured that action is being taken to resolve the issue.
Regards
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