Returning. [Open.]

[cmdr_renegade]

subject line [ open/closed ]
who ; The Normandy Crew et all return from Asphodel.
what ; They find the base...uh...out of sorts.
where ; Garrus's Apartment Base.
when ; After completing their tasks on Asphodel.
warning(s) ; None.

"I never thought I'd be glad to be back here," Shepard muttered darkly as she holstered her pistol and opened the door

Comments

[woobietrope]

[SOUNDS!]

[WALL-E rolls out from the hall where he'd been on standby, waving and bleeping enthusiastically. They're back! He knew they'd come back! See!]

[He's bringing the biggest frog along! It looks like this and is probably like five pounds!]

[Maybe it's related to Thane.]

[cmdr_renegade]

The little bot came flailing around the corner, his treads tossing muck on the walls as he did. The frog in his arms looked less than happy to be there. It's somber expression was far too familiar for Shepard's tastes. I looked a little like--no, there were more important things.

"Very...nice." Shepard offered and let out a short sigh. "So...this? You brought it all?"

[woobietrope]

[Nod nod nod!]

diii-rekkkk-tiv.

[Bring back things of note! PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING LIVING WAS A THING OF NOTE. But at least he had a sense to sort them out and bring back only the smallest, or the biggest, or the most colorful, or the most interesting, or the ones that looked most like Turians and Drells.]

[He puts the frog down and holds out a turtle. Maybe this one is related to Garrus.]

life

lots !

[cmdr_renegade]

"I can see that."

Shepard took the turtle from him and the turtle stared at her dispassionately. She returned the stare and absently tucked it under her arm. Its legs shuffled awkwardly in the air and she ignored it.

Wall-e looked very proud of himself. It was almost endearing. At any rate, it looked like yelling at him would be unproductive. Shepard let out a long sigh and shook her head.

"Next time, more video, less...lizards."

[woobietrope]

[She doesn't look too happy at the turtle...]

[Oh! Oh! More video, less lizards? Maybe she wanted VIDEO of the things of note rather than the actual things of note. Humans liked TV!]

[But he has video! Lots of video! He rolls over to the wall and pushes a button on his box and splays a screen on the wall, fast-forwarding through hours of swamp wandering, many of which are accompanied by WALL-E's voice humming showtunes.]

[Swamp, swamp, lizards, frogs, alligators, the inside of an alligator's mouth, a pissed-off looking alligator with a few new broken teeth...]

[cmdr_renegade]

The video was extensive, apparently he never turned it off. Shepard watched it roll, and listened to the high-speed singing and occasional screeching. Despite how haphazard it was, it was a decent chronicle of the area and included more than a couple water hazards.

She'd probably be able to construct a very accurate map.

Shepard's brows rose in tandem and she looked down at the little bot. "Good work, Wall-e," she said and shuffled the turtle under her other arm. It chewed on her armored finger with gradual fervor. Aside from the numerous...creatures, it was a fruitful assignment.

[woobietrope]

[Totally records everything.]

[There might be WALL-E coming up to the apartment at the end and putting Shepard's bra on his face.]

[Then him COMPACTING EVERYTHING IN SIGHT. The things too big for him to compact, he SHEARS INTO SMALLER PIECES WITH A LASER. Which would explain some things...]

[cmdr_renegade]

She watched as the high speed replay caught Wall-e dumping buckets full of animals and clearing out the place. That laser was something she hadn't been expecting, but not too unusual. She watched as he chopped apart the table and compacted it.

Was that the whole couch? And the bed?

"For a trash bot, you suck at keeping things clean," Shepard added dryly as the video log concluded.

[woobietrope]

o?

[But everything is clean! It's all stacked up nice and neat in a big pile in the center of the living room. Lots more room now! Isn't that the point?]

[Plays back his recorded directive. It reads something like, if it's there, CRUSH IT. If it's too big to crush, LASER IT and then CRUSH IT. Make lots of space!]

[cmdr_renegade]

His primary program was: cut and crush.

And she'd left him alone in the base.

The turtle was chewing on the kevlar, medium-weave beneath her arm and pushing on her with his little legs. Shepard put it down on the stack of trash-cubes and wiped off her hand on her thigh armor.

"I see," Shepard answered slowly and crossed her arms. "Try...not to do that indoors."

She looks around.

"It is roomier."

A toad next to her foot let out a deep croak and jumped at her leg. It failed to find purchase and fell against the ground with a wet slap.