(no subject)

[sincerelymee]

I was told something tonight (in quite graphic detail) that I can tell will be the cause of numerous sleepless nights. I hate the world, I really do. I hate this war and I hate hearing these terrible things and I hate that there are people in the world who actually justify them--not to mention those who commit them. I don't know why I'm clinging to this one though (perhaps the intricate step-by-step description of it) but I suppose it could have something to do with this annoying emotional rollercoaster I've been on recently.. however, I'm not betting on that. I think I've just had enough. this is too much. and as for Rose, who saw the video, well she's handling it a hell of a lot better than I would have. that's something that would scar me for life. everything already has with just the information itself. this is just sick. life has become so scary that I feel like eventually it won't be worth living anymore. there are certain places people like going that they shouldn't have to wonder whether it's going to be bombed that day.. certain forms of transportation that they shouldn't have to worry whether it's still safe.. certain strangers they shouldn't have to look at and be suspicious of.. and I'm talking worldwide. there's nothing really safe anymore.. no "security blanket" so to speak. technically, nothing is completely safe, but it becomes a whole nother issue when it's about being safe from other people. people who want nothing more in their life but to destroy yours.

bad feeling's back. I'm sure it just has to do with tonight, but that doesn't change the fact that it's there. I think I'm gonna go listen to Les Miserables (which I did earlier today). we're watching the movie in euro and I got the urge to start listening to the show again.. I almost forgot how much I loved it.

I can't wait till Bryan comes home. a week from tomorrow. goodnight.