Portocarrero Chronicle 2.3 - 400 BABIES !!!!111!!1!!
Welcome to Part 5 of the Portocarrero Chronicle
WARNING: This post can take a long time to load for slow computers/internet connections, it has over 60 large images in it. Dial up may take a LONG time. Also.. might contain some nudity, cussing, gross humor, body-emissions and a wacky commentary. Enter at your own risk.
Previously on the Portocarrero Chronicle
Gen 1 - 1.0
Gen 2 - 2.0 2.1 2.2
Last time, on the Portocarrero Chronicle:
Ossy the Ghost hung out. A lot. Meg was crazy AND a good mom. Sometimes simultaneously.
Jay was STILL a Zombie. Momo was Dr. House, and a mad scientist. We got to see a lot of Mad Science in action.
Aislin grew up and was kicked out of the house for being .. um.. herself. AND to make enough room for Kevin, Conner and Liam.
Who all showed up in a picnic basket, from the hospital. We also got to see SG2's posterior. Bry got a makeover. And the triplets were evil.
Let's see what they're up to now!
We start this week's adventure with... Ponfarr on the High-Seas. Meg is the new
Money-Making Writer in the family. But she's no Cy. This is her first Romance title.
(She's a Hopeless Romantic, remember?)
SG2: Yeah, that's right people. I made the Star Trek reference.
Good zombie girls, do their homework. Isn't that right Jay?
Jay: Rrrrrrrr Braiiii... Hoooomeworrrrrrrk!
SG *Pats jay* Good girl.
SG2: Who's a pretty zombie? You are! Yes! Yes you are!
And here we see Momo helping.. Kevin... use his blocks...
*looks at Momo in Mad Scientist outfit*... oh no.. oh this is not going to end well.
Momo: That's right Son. Put the square peg in the square hole. And if it doesn't fit, use
Hydrochloric acid. That will make it fit.
Kevin: Hee hahah hehehe! Bwue...!
SG: *face palms* ... that could have been worse. Close one, though.
THAT'S RIGHT MEG! CHOP THAT CABBAGE WITH A VENGEAGE!
As always, Meg is uber fashionable in her sexy pajamas! The Underwear gene runs strong in this family!
J.. jay.. i... is that.. a... a smile!?
NOPE! That's her OMG GRANDPA'S GHOST! Don't sneak up on me like THAT face...
false alarm.
This has to be the funniest animation in game. Its called Gaze Into Eyes
Meg does it all the time. It's special to Hopeless Romantics. The kicked up heel always makes me laugh.
Useless.. Freaking.. Babysitter. If this kid (Dedric Barney) ever comes over to your house baby sit...
Password lock ALL your computers. Maybe ACTUAL baby sitting will happen!
My kids were desperate for food and potty at this point. He was too busy playing games :\
Ass.
WOOHOOO IT'S MOMO's BIRTHDAY!
Momo No.. wait! Simgoddess.. Don't!! I'm not ready to be an Adult yet!!
Momo I... I think I have to pee! Yes.. that's it!
SG: Shut up Momo.. Just do it! Look! SPARKLES!
Ok.. Warning:
This is about to become FanGirl land. You've been warned.
SG EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DIMPLEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!
And Sexy face.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
.. SG2 is a pile of goo right now :) Momo sure knows how to turn on the charm.
We love him. He's a Keeper.
He's a full grown adult. AND a Doctor. A WORLD RENOWNED DOCTOR
He gets a grown up make over. Hoooooot!
Obligatory Momo booty shot for SG2
I.. is that a tattoo? I hear you asking
Why, yes! Yes it is! More on that later.
Momo Cuteness Spam:
.... or as I like to call it ADORABLE DIMPLE TIME!
.. No he's not retarded...
He's Serenading his lady ^^
She seems.. uh.. distacted?
.. wait for it... wait for it...
*meg looks elsewhere, Momo looks down*
ATTACK!!!!
Meg: *Monster FACE* >8}{
Apparently.. Meg is a Brain Eating Monster. (I bet that's where Jay gets it >.>)
Momo on the other hand is complete oblivious to the >8}{ staring at him from above O.O;
ASIDE: Meg and Fiona have the same haircut... and I just realized.. both parents are red heads.
Cy had red hair too.. this explains the bright red brood these two are breeding. How.. that.. anyway
SO.. Meg got a haircut. You can see it below.
Meg Oh.. no! MY BREASTs!! WHAT'S HAPPENING!
Meg Teehee that TICKLES!
TADA! Adult Meg!
Meg is a full blown adult AND the mother of 9 kids! TIME FOR A SEXY MOMMY MAKE OVER!
Business in the front...
PARTAY IN THE BACK!
Yes.. I know I just compared her clothes to a mullet.. but hey! Sexy booty alert!
SG2 has been complaining about her weight. Fine.. work out time.
I.. inadvertently... looked away for too long.
She.. got too skinny >.< SG NO LIKEY!
WAUGH!!! MEG!!! YOU'RE LIKE JACK SKELLINGTON! HOLY SHIT!
Watch out.. this face has sharp cheek bones >.<
... Sleeping ^^
They both snore. It's like a ZzzZzzZz symphony!
... Jay. You're undead. Undead don't have babies.
WHY ARE YOU READING A BABY-PARENTING BOOK?! Bad Jay! BAD!
This is the THIRD time I've caught her reading it >.> WHAT GIVES?!
Momo would play guitar very day. Practice makes perfect.
Ghost-Daddy Cy loves coming out of his grave to have a listen. Yes. It's creepy.
Bry is a book worm. He reads constantly. He's read up to my current game spot.. 40 some books.
He needs to read 60 for a wish/short-term-goal. he's read EVERY BOOK EVER WRITTEN in game.
AND every book Cy ever wrote. And all the books Meg's cranked out...
So.. I made him write too. (He wanted to. I didn't force him) this is his first title...
but.. that's why the title is that. HE reads too much. And doesn't believe me when I tell him that!
Mew mew mew mew mew ^^ Yum.
More guitar.. here's a better picture of the sleeve tattoo.
Me and SG2 had this big conversation about none of her kids getting tattooed without a good reason/meaning.
She's jewish. She married a GENTILE. So its OK for him to be tattooed xD but since then she's come
up saying her babies need tattoos.. without good reasons. Hard teasing ensues!
Liam.. you are so gross... The trips are all this bad
Constantly flicking their boogers all over the house.
They laugh maniacally while they do it too.
Meg: Liam.. did you just flick your boogers on the carpet?
Liam: ... No mommy.. (they lie so well at that age)
this scene is SO MUPPET BABIES!
Well she must have believed him. She picked him up and he wiped his finger all over her nightie >.<
Notice the concealed hand and the sneaky face he's pulling >.>
Everyone in this family is OBLIVIOUS!
.. No. She's not smiling.
This is the obligatory YAY I'M GROWING UP MY TROUBLES ARE OVER FACE.
Notice her eyes are still pretty undead.
Spin Spin Spin spin SPARKLE!!!
Jay: *Gags*.. WHY IS IT IN MY MOUTH?!
SG Sorry Jay. I don't control the Sparkles.
Quick daddy grow up face!! Don't worry people, it passes!
See? Zombie Jay is back :P Phew!
We had a Make Jay A Goth request.
Never forget: Sim God Delivers! I think she turned out pretty cute. The stockings are a CC I got off MTS2.
She looks so... cute ^^ I love her make over. MOOODY ZOMBIE!
I did a few final tweaks. Darkening her eyebrows and giving her a new hairstyle with dyed tips.
Even MORE awesome!
Bry's second book.
Oh hey.. an annoying baby sitter who keeps coming over while She's watching the Cooking Channel
and interrupts by turning on video games...
PREPARE... ZOMBIE STARE
Jay *ZOMBIE STARES at Babysitter, like she wants to eat his brains*
*baby sitter gets scared and wanders off*
Jay PHEW! I'm so glad that worked! *turns the TV back to the Cooking Channel*
SG Jay... *sniff, rubs at tear* I'm so proud.. good girl.
JAY ZAFTIG MEG IS BACK! Right'on!
Momo notices, because he pounces that sexy wife of his right fast! :D She's happy. He's happy.
Win - Win.
Since Fiona wants to max art/guitar.. and she's maxed Art already.. she needs to crack down on her guitar.
EVERY sim in my house who gets a Play/Max guitar wish gets their own personal guitar.
Fiona gets a very pretty but worn blue one :) I like it. Third personalized guitar in the house atm.
A family that levels together is a family that stays together!
Besides.. Being Heir and Heir-Spare.. these two need to get cracking on their lifetime wishes.
Meg FINALLY finishes Ponfarr on the High Seas and takes a moment to roll her eyes at SG for making
her work on such a long book. She sags back and relaxes for a moment.
SG lets her. I'm a good SG. Notice, again, sexy jammies.
After she's had a breather she joins Liam in his playing house.
Liam Bam Bam.. Teheheheheh!
Meg Uh.. Liam, sweetie.. stop beating daddy's head against the floor...
Meg See, honey? Play like this.... *shows him*
Liam *mimics*
Meg: That's right honey. Much better :)
Meg enjoys playing house way more than Liam does... xD Can you tell?
Further proof sim babies will stick anything in their mouth.
SORRY all these pics are Liam.. but the other babies are BORING.
Kevin's BIRTHDAY TIME!... He's gonna be a mad scientist.. look at that pose!
I can just tell these things >.> as much as SG2 refuses to agree with me.
Oh look.. the Ally McBeal dancing baby we misplaced.
So THAT's where it went... :\
Kevin... I.. don't even know what to say.
yes I do.. GET A HAIRCUT.
Liam is too preoccupied by his blue booties to have a birthday party.
That and picking his nose >.< LIAM, REALLY NOW!
He grows up in a simian pose.. with a Paul monkey shirt. Appropriate.
Mommy with Daddy's hair...
Conner YAY.. I'm so FREAKING TIRED but its my birthday WHO CARES!
Conner.. I hate brillo head.. Daddy eyes, mommy face...
Conner *grabs the back of his neck* Man.. growing up is sure exhausting YAWWWN
SG2 will respond to this with there super gay Conner impersonation later xD
Liam grew up with the DARE DEVIL TRAIT
.. everything he does is EXTREME. xD He drinks POWERTHIRST!
Notice his EXTREME SHOWER UNTIL EXTREMELY CLEAN and EXTREME BUBBLE BATH options.
Momo rolls the Have a Baby want... Uh momo.. You have 9 kids AND a full house
Fuck you (deletes want)
.. Fiona comes home from school with a friend.
This friend is a horrible influence.. LOOK! SHE HAS FIONA MAKING THAT FUCKED UP FACE!
*sends the friend home right away* stay away >.> don't fuck up our kids with your drugs and faces!
That's the Fiona I love ^^ who's my pretty heir :D *pinches cheek*
And that's it for now!
Expect a new update in a couple of days.