No Other Choice, Chapter 3/6
Title: No Other Choice
Author: SimplyShanni
Beta: None. All mistakes are mine and mine alone.
Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction. It has been written solely for fun, not for profit. No disrespect is meant to the actual individuals represented here and I make no claims about their sexual orientation in real life.
Pairing: Orlibean
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Romance and a bit of Schmoop
Summary: Something is very wrong with Sean. He hasn't been himself since returning to New Zealand after Christmas break.
Warnings: Chapter 3 contains Minor Language and Adult Concepts.
Rating: Ranges between PG and Hard R. Please do not read this story if you are under the age of 18! This chapter will be PG-13.
Chapter 3/6
Sean Takes The Next Step
The closer Orlando got to his own beach house, the slower he walked, especially when he noticed the car sitting in his driveway. Even though it was now quite dark out, he could see that this wasn't just any car. It was an SUV. A black SUV. Sean's SUV, with Sean inside it, no less. Bloody hell, what was he supposed to do now? Yes, he'd told Viggo that they needed to talk, but he hadn't meant this soon, dammit! 'Ah well,' he sighed inwardly, and knowing there was nothing else for it, he shored up his lagging courage, took a deep, steadying breath, squared his shoulders resolutely and approached the driver's side of the vehicle. If he was going to do this, he'd best do it right. After only a second's hesitation, he forced his hand to knock determinedly on the window.
The unexpected knock against the glass startled the man inside. Sean had been busy staring off into space, lost in his own worrisome thoughts. Even though he knew that Orlando would be arriving at any moment, he'd still managed to lose track of the time. 'Stupid git!' he cursed himself. Bad enough that Viggo's phone call had sent him rushing over here like some sort of demented moth, eager to fling himself headlong into Orlando's flame, but to be caught wool-gathering somehow seemed the height of embarrassment. Mentally vowing to kill the interfering American if things turned out badly, Sean quickly opened the door and stepped out of the car.
The two friends stood facing one another silently as they slowly adjusted to the reality of each other's presence. 'Damn, Sean looks good in black!' Orlando thought randomly as he took in the close-fitting black jeans and the subtle vertical striping of the long-sleeved black and grey button down that the gorgeous blonde was wearing. Neither man spoke for what felt like an eternity as the tension continued to build between them. Before it could reach crisis point, Orli gave himself a firm mental kick and finally broke the uneasy stalemate. "Hello, Sean," he greeted neutrally, tamping down quite ruthlessly on the nervous excitement that made it difficult for him to even think. "I didn't expect to find you here. Would you like to come inside?" he invited politely. There, his Mum would be proud. When in doubt, fall back on good manners.
Following the younger man's lead, Sean cleared the giant boulder that was lodged in his throat and replied with equal politeness, "Yes, thank you, Orlando, I would. I have some rather important matters I'd like to discuss with you," he explained, then cringed internally at the stiff formality of his voice. 'Who are these two strangers, so awkward and uncomfortable with one another? What happened to the easygoing friends who delight in taking the piss with each other, who never hesitate to share a laugh or a hug?' he wondered almost desperately. 'Have I really allowed our relationship to degenerate into this?'
Orlando must have been thinking along the same lines because he suddenly advanced on the unsuspecting man almost angrily, growling, "This is ridiculous, Seanie, and I refuse to do it anymore! C'mere, ya big Northern bastard, and give me a proper greeting." And before he knew what was happening, Sean felt himself being enveloped in a hug. A hug as only Orli could hug. Not just with his arms, but with his whole body, with his heart and with his soul. A delicious shiver worked its way down Sean's spine as he felt the lad bury his nose into the sensitive curve of his neck, raising tingling little goosebumps as hot breath was huffed into the open collar of his shirt. Good lord, he had missed this, he admitted freely as he latched onto Orlando with equal ferocity and hugged him back with all his considerable strength.
He felt the lean, lithe body in his arms start to tremble and he could only assume that Orli had begun to cry. Knowing that his assinine behavior earlier today was the most likely cause, instantaneous remorse flooded through him. He was just about to apologize when he realized that the trembling was actually suppressed laughter. Pulling back just enough so that he had a clear view, he gazed in wonder at the beautiful, joyous face of Orlando Bloom, who could no longer hold back his whoops and giggles. Shaking his head, Sean could do nothing but join in. He defied anyone, man, woman or child, to listen to this young man giggle and not be drawn into the irresistible sound!
A sense of peace settled over both men, as if the world had once again shifted back on its proper axis, and they slowly calmed. Though a bit reluctant, their arms finally released the tight clasp they had on one another and Orlando stepped slightly away from the older man. Reaching out, he ran a slender finger down the bridge of Sean's bold nose, then laid his palm against a strongly defined cheek. "Sorry," he mumbled in chagrin. "Stress relief, I guess. I've missed you, Seanie," he added with simple honesty, the look in his melting chocolate eyes revealing just how much, before a mischievous glint entered the rich brown depths.
That playful light told Sean to beware. He knew that Orlando was about to push his buttons, big time, and he wasn't disappointed. "You should come with me now," the young man instructed in a tone of mock-exasperation as he grabbed Sean's hand and hauled him up to the porch. "I think we've given the neighbors enough of a show. Fat lot of good a display like that is gonna do your 'manly man' reputation, Bean," he continued to scold as he finally succeeded in getting the somewhat sticky lock to open. As he ushered Sean in after him, he decided to really push the edge of the envelope by adding, "Best get you inside, mate, before everyone and their Aunt Tillie knows what a big girl's blouse you can be."
Orlando was well aware that there was a set limit to the amount of taunting that Sean would take without retaliation. He was also very aware that said limit had likely been reached, if not breached, so he braced himself inwardly. Attempting to maintain a casual air, he closed and locked the front door, then removed his jacket and hung it neatly in the nearby coat closet. Once the closet door was firmly shut, he quickly found himself backed up against it as Sean leaned in and deliberately settled his powerful hands on either side of his head. This left him effectively trapped, but with a good half foot of space still between them. "Happy to see that you haven't changed, Orli," the man remarked with deceptive lightness, the wicked glint in those flashing emerald eyes pinning him to the cool wooden surface as surely as the muscular body only inches from his own. "Still the same relentless tease. Do you have anything else you wish to add, lad?" Sean asked archly, and now his voice had dropped to a low, thrilling growl, velvet-rough and deep enough to reverberate through Orlando like a shockwave.
It was far from the first time that he'd been this close to Sean during one of their playful confrontations. In fact he'd lost count of the many times they had tussled and tickled as they rolled around on the floor together. This, however, felt very different. Somehow, everything had changed. Dramatically. Never before had Orlando felt so hot and shaky, so weak in the knees that he wanted to sink into Sean, let the bigger man support him, absorb him, wrap him up in those brawny arms and hold him close, never let him go.
An irrepressible shudder shook his slender frame and Orli realized that, strategically, he had made an enormous mistake. In his eagerness to reestablish their former rapport, he had tried to get things back to their old teasing footing. Unfortunately, his newly discovered feelings for Sean were making that impossible. When his glance fell to Sean's pink mouth and he caught himself wondering how it would feel to press their lips together, what it might taste like to probe inside with his seeking tongue, he truly began to panic. He had to get away and he had to do it now, or he would make a total fool of himself!
The urge to freak out and shove the heavier man away from him by force was almost overwhelming, but he managed to suppress it. Instead, he marshaled every iota of skill he'd ever learned at Guildhall and proceeded to act his arse off. Boldly, he made eye contact with Sean and smiled. "You might want to let me go, Beanie," he suggested rather smugly. "Right now I really have to pee, and I won't be able to hold it much longer. As you're standing rather close, I'd hate for you to get caught in the crossfire, so to speak. Would give a whole new and highly unpleasant meaning to 'taking the piss' with a mate, yeah?
An amused smirk teased Sean's lips and his posture lost some of its playful menace, but he still refused to back off. As he continued to eye the younger man suspiciously, Orlando decided it was time to pull out the big guns. Not above using a little emotional blackmail to gain his release, he added, "Come on, Sean, pleeease! I really do need to go. Besides, you have to admit, after today, you kinda owe me.
Ah, mission accomplished! Sean stepped back as if he'd been burned, instantly allowing Orlando his freedom as a look of guilt suffused his handsome features. As he took note of that hang-dog expression, Orli almost wished he had kept his blasted mouth shut, but desperate times had definitely called for desperate measures. Or so he tried to convince himself, even as he offered a hurried, "Thanks!" to Sean, and headed for the bathroom. Once there, he quickly took care of business, arguing with himself all the while. As he was washing up, he came to the reluctant conclusion that the only proper thing to do was apologize and tell his friend the truth. Well, not the whole truth, but enough to satisfy his own nagging conscience, anyway. He only hoped the man wouldn't hold a grudge.
He walked out to find that Sean had made himself at home on the couch, but that he still appeared troubled and ill at ease. Orlando couldn't stand it for another second. He rushed over and immediately knelt down in front of him, reaching out to take the larger hands into his own. "I'm sorry, Seanie," he offered regretfully, looking directly at him so that Sean would know that his apology was genuine. "I shouldn't have made you feel guilty like that, especially since I did it mostly to get away. It was mean of me. Do you forgive me?"
Sean's green eyes widened in amazement. He removed one hand from Orlando's comforting grasp in order to cup his cheek, shaking his head in a bemused fashion as he ran his thumb repeatedly over the high, prominent curve. "Sometimes I wonder if you're for real, lad. I've been avoiding you, treating you like shite for weeks now, not to mention going off on you like some half-arsed maniac at lunch this afternoon, and here you are, apologizing to me! Please, don't. You honestly have nothing to be sorry for. The real question should be, can you forgive me?"
Orlando blinked in surprise, not expecting such praise after the rather dirty trick he'd just pulled, but he wanted the man to know that there truly were no hard feelings. Nuzzling into the caress of Sean's palm, much like a kitten would, he smiled softly, reassuringly. "I'm so relieved and happy to have you here with me again that I think I can forgive you almost anything, Seanie," he admitted. The smile slowly faded, though, when he reached up to remove Sean's hand from his cheek, giving it a squeeze as if to emphasize the severity of his next admonition. "But I hope you realize that doesn't mean that I'm giving you a free ride with no explanations required. It's way past time we talked, and I do expect you to tell me what the hell has been going on with you. I'm talking the whole shebang here, Sean. No more holding back, so be warned!"
The moment Orlando was finished speaking, his dark, apprehensive eyes sought the cool green gaze of the older man, as if afraid he might be asking for too much. He needn't have worried. As far as Sean was concerned, Orli had every right to demand full disclosure. That's exactly what he had come here tonight to offer. He was going to lay it all on the line, no more games and no more hiding. Despite the nervous tension cramping sharply in his stomach, Sean met the anxious eyes with a somber, consenting nod. "Fair enough, lad," he acknowledged, and the tone of his voice was utterly serious. "The time has come to talk. I just don't quite know where to begin."
Now that he knew he was going to get his way, that Sean was done hiding from him, Orlando could finally relax. He felt a soul-deep sense of satisfaction, an odd, indefinable inner shift, as if some previously unknown but vital part of himself had clicked into place at last. A brilliant smile spread across his face as he regained his feet and reached out to run his fingers through the dark gold silk of Sean's hair before turning on his heel and heading for the kitchen. "I'm going to make us some tea," he called over his shoulder. "That'll give you time to organize your thoughts and when I get back, we can get down to business."
Stunned, breathless, unable to muster so much as a nod of agreement, Sean could do nothing but stare helplessly at the gracefully retreating back. He was quite positive that Orlando's smile should be registered as a lethal weapon! 'Get a grip, Bean!' he admonished himself sternly. 'Sitting here mooning over the gorgeous lad will not help your cause!' Releasing a snort of self-disgust, he ran his hands roughly through his hair, noting as he did so that it did little to ease the tingling left behind by long, elegant fingers. Orli would be back soon and he needed to know what he was going to say. Now that he was finally ready to act on the feelings he'd been suppressing since the beginning of the shoot, the last thing he wanted to do was scare the young man off.
He was still trying to figure it all out when Orlando returned, carrying a tray that held not only the accoutrements for tea, but some delicious looking biscuits as well. "In case you're feeling peckish," he remarked with a nod at the small platter of shortbread as he carefully set the tray down on the coffee table. "I, myself, am still quite stuffed. Viggo puts on a very nice spread, I must say. It's too bad you decided not to join us." He finally met Sean's eyes as he sat down on the couch. "Did he call you?" he asked perceptively.
At the rather reluctant nod he received, Orlando smiled. Fortunately, for the sake of Sean's sanity, it wasn't one of those deadly, all-out beaming smiles. Just a quick upwards tilt of the lips, but even that small quirk managed to raise his heart rate. And for Sean, it was a defining moment, a lightening bolt to the brain, so to speak. For the last several weeks he had forced himself to stay away from the lad, but being with him once again, here, now, tonight, he felt the last ounce of his resistance crumble into dust. If he had only suspected it before, now he knew it as an absolute fact of life. Sean Bean was in love with Orlando Bloom. Purely. Simply. Deeply. Irrevocably. The pertinent question now was, could Orlando love him back?
Completely unaware that Sean had just reached one of the most important conclusions of his life, Orli occupied himself with filling teacups, automatically adding the correct amount of cream and sugar to Sean's. When he tried to hand over the cup, however, and found that the man was too distracted to even notice, he couldn't help but wonder what was going on in Sean's mind. Setting the tea back down, he reached over to lay an inquiring hand on the strong arm, pulling back swiftly when Sean practically jumped off the couch in response.
"Sorry, Beanie," he apologized, "didn't mean to scare you like that. Tea's ready, if you'd like some," he reminded with a nod to the cup he'd already prepared for him. "You were miles away, mate," he observed as he placed the cup and saucer into Sean's now-extended hands. "You're not worrying that Vig'll be mad that you told me about his phone call, are you? 'Cause I pretty much had that figured out for myself. It was a bit too much of a coincidence to come home and find you waiting for me in my driveway," he added with a cheeky smirk.
Sean reached for a piece of buttery-sweet shortbread, savoring it slowly before taking a cautious sip of the piping hot tea. 'Ahh, perfectly prepared!' he noted with a deep sigh of satisfaction. Say what you will about Orlando's hit and miss cooking skills, but he did know how to make an excellent cup of tea. A good cuppa always had a soothing effect on Sean's nerves and he was grateful to have his emotions back on a slightly more even keel now. He was also relieved to find that the impish grin currently gracing Orli's exquisite face didn't immediately overwhelm him with the desire to lay the lad out and ravish him on the spot. Well, at least not too much, anyway. Considering the way he'd been feeling only moments ago, he'd been a tad concerned that any type of smile from Orlando would provoke just such a reaction.
Shaking his head at the daft nature of these thoughts, Sean's lips curved into a little smile of his own. He paused to pop the final bite of shortbread into his mouth, chewing and swallowing the delectable morsel before answering the young man's question. "No, Elfling, I'm not worried about Viggo. I was just thinking very deeply about something and sort of lost track of where I was," he admitted sheepishly. "So, are you ready to talk? I'm still not sure where to begin, lad, but this has been put off for far too long."
Sensing Sean's nervous uncertainty, Orlando gave him a firm, encouraging pat on the shoulder before taking hold of his hand. "Begin wherever you're most comfortable, Seanie. You can take as long as you need. No matter what you're about to tell me, I'll still be here when you're done. I'll also try my best not to interrupt," he promised sincerely, then couldn't help but add, "Unless it's really, really important."
Sean nearly choked on his last sip of Earl Grey. As he carefully replaced the now empty cup and saucer back on the tea tray, he began to laugh. He honestly couldn't help himself. 'Unless it's really, really important.' It was such a typical Orli-style disclaimer that he simply lost it. It took quite a while for his helpless chuckles to die down, and when they finally did, the only thing he could think to say was, "God love you, lad, please don't ever change!" Despite the acknowledging humor that gleamed in his dark chocolate eyes, Orlando was sitting there with his arms folded across his chest, shaking his head at Sean's antics like the stern parent of a wayward child. "Nice try, Beanie, but you're not getting out of this so easily. Now quit stalling and start talking!" he ordered in a brisk, no-nonsense voice.
So, this was it. The moment of truth was here at last, and even though he didn't quite know what would come out of his own mouth, Sean took a deep breath and let his instincts guide him. "First of all, lad, I owe you an apology for the appalling way I behaved earlier. I am so sorry that I hurt you...embarrassed you. I had no right to do that. I was talking to Vig and you interrupted at the worst possible moment, but I'll explain more about that later. For now, suffice it to say that my overreaction had very little to do with being mad at you, and everything to do with all the...crap that I've been dealing with recently. Can you truly forgive me? I know you implied that you already have, but I've a need to hear the actual words."
The sincerity and honest regret in Sean's beautiful green eyes caused the breath to catch in Orlando's throat and he felt his already soft heart melt even further. "Of course I forgive you, Seanie," he rushed to assure his remorseful friend. "You know me, I can never hold a grudge. Especially not against someone I lo...uh, look upon as a true friend," he stuttered out, blanching apprehensively at what he'd almost revealed. 'Oh, that was too close!' he mentally berated as he just barely managed to choke back his admission of love. And to Sean himself, of all people! Momentary dread held him nearly paralyzed as he tried to discern if his secret was still safe. Fortunately, the man appeared to be too relieved by Orlando's forgiveness to have caught the foolish blunder.
'Appeared' being the operative word. Sean Bean was not an actor for nothing. He had picked up on the lad's uncharacteristic stumble over his words. He'd also noticed the sudden pallor of his complexion under the smooth olive tan, as if he was panicked by the small slip. 'Now what was that all about?' he wondered, highly intrigued but careful to keep his curiosity hidden. He didn't want to add to the young man's discomfort right now, but it was definitely something he planned on getting to the bottom of, after he finished making his own confession, of course.
Which he'd better get moving on. He'd already taken the first step by apologizing, and he was genuinely thankful that Orlando possessed such a compassionate and understanding nature. Placing his hand on the young man's leanly muscled shoulder, he gave it an appreciative squeeze. "Thank you, Orli, I really did need to hear that. I never would have forgiven myself if my damnable stupidity had damaged our friendship. And I do consider us to be close friends, lad. I...care about you very much, even if I don't always show it. Especially lately. I know I've been treating you unfairly for the last several weeks and I'm sorry about that, too. There is a reason. Not...not a very...good reason, but a...a reason nonetheless," and Sean's words tapered to a confused halt. Unsure of where to go from here, his hand fell from Orlando's shoulder and back into his own lap as he looked away in shame.
It nearly tore Orlando's heart out to see this vibrant, forceful man looking almost...broken. With a tender finger, he tilted Sean's chin up to lock gazes with the older man, hoping he could sense the unconditional support being offered to him so freely. "You're doing just fine, Seanie," he assured softly. "The only thing you need to remember is that I am here for you and I always will be. I'm not going to judge you or criticize you, and I'm willing to help in any way I can, even if it's only to listen. You've come to mean...so much to me, Sean. I've never felt so close to anyone as I do to you, which I guess is why I've been so upset by the distance that's grown between us lately. I need you to...to stop shutting me out, Seanie. I promise, there is nothing you can say that will ever make me stop...stop loving you...as...as my friend," he concluded in a choked tone that obviously bespoke of suppressed tears.
When the sweet, caring words finally registered in his mind, Sean was inundated by such an intense flood of feeling, he wasn't sure how to react. The glistening dark eyes and the depth of heartfelt emotion conveyed so clearly on Orlando's expressive face brought a corresponding sting of tears to his own eyes and he found himself reaching out to pull the lad into a tight embrace. Oh, yes! This was so good, so right, and only one thing could make it better! Without stopping to think about the consequences of his actions, Sean searched out Orlando's lips and began devouring them in a series of probing, heated kisses. So caught up was he in the delicious fulfillment of one of his most ardent fantasies that it took him more than a full minute to realize that the still form in his arms was neither responding to nor rejecting his passionate advances. When that fact eventually clicked, Sean slowly, reluctantly released Orli and hesitantly met the bemused eyes that gazed back at him in mute shock.
TBC