May 16th, 2006 --> 2:35pm
Last night I had a moment of clarity. A realization of something totally true for me, although in this sense it was completely applicable to someone else too. I realized last night as i was talking to my friend about how much she feels like she's changed and grown this year and how scared she is that when she goes back to her hometown she's going to drift back into her "old habits" of being overly quiet and reserved. Out of nowhere I realized how much i've been thinking about this lately. i figured that everywhere you go there are things that affect you. things that affect your personality, but not your personality really so much as the way you present yourself, the way your personality is reflected to the people around you. it's not you changing really, it's just a reflection of how your surroundings make you feel and how you react to them. like around my mom and sister, i am a totally different way than i am around just my friends. and mixed company is where it gets funny. i have changed a lot to be sure since i moved here and did all this, but really i'm the same person. and yes, i'm growing and changing on a daily basis but it's cool to think that when i go down to Asheville for school i have a chance to start over from scratch with people and if i want people to perceive me and treat me in a different way there will be no bad habits formed and everything will be fresh. this all gives me joy in knowing i will have a new chance to create who i am. if, when i go there, the people around meare really interested in a certain type of music, then chances are i will eventually find myself attracted to it too. yay for if, then scientific statements. *dork*!