Why do...........
I ever just think he'll actually do what he says he will?
Well here it is 3 days later after he offlines me and tells me, with my new hours I'll be able to call more often. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, still no phone call. Maybe he screwed up and told it to me by mistake *LOL* which could be likely...REAL LIKELY.!
It just bothers me...his way of thinking. Who does he think he's fooling? While you call me "babe" and tell me how afraid you are of losing your marriage, your family and telling me I WANT TO HAVE WITH YOU WHAT I KEEP DREAMING OF ABOUT US......you're telling whoever else how much you want the samething with them. :rolls eyes:
You know, I am not STUPID where it comes to you. Remember, I've been playing your game a lot longer than anyone else in your life. You say your, "I'm sorries *which I have YET TO EVER RECEIVE from you* and say all the right things, just to have who ever you feel will melt like butter in your words.
And tho I am past the denial part of you...which is telling myself that i know that he means everything that he says or the finally he's going to make that change for me. Here I've been with him for 6 years and he hasn't changed. Not after all the threats for leaving, not after even packing up lil mama as a baby and leaving *only to return after i had cooled off*, not after he's oldest son was born & surely not even after double trouble #2's heart surgery. So at this point what would make anyone think that he would change for them....when he can't even do it to save the marriage with me he says he's so afraid of loosing or when he continues to play his game on "her".
For her I feel so horrible. Tho these days we aren't friends *even tho I miss her and her friendship terribly* I feel awful that she was sucked in by him & his game just as I have been all these years. I'm just glad tho that there isn't anything holding her in a relationship to him other than a hurt heart that wishes he could/would be a better man. As I know who she is...I know she has more to offer a person and that she deserves to be treated with more respect & more love & care than she has been given by any other person in her life. For the exception of one person that comes to mind and to see them together in the past......they made a "perfect" fit. And should you come across this entry Em's I know if you think about it you know who I am talking about.
Tho I can admit there are days that for the sake of me & the kiddlets I WANT TO BELIEVE HIS WORDS. But that's the deal...they are only words. :SIGHS: :/
i have so many icons below b/c i couldn't figure which one fit perfect..so these all fit perfect to me.
Well here it is 3 days later after he offlines me and tells me, with my new hours I'll be able to call more often. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, still no phone call. Maybe he screwed up and told it to me by mistake *LOL* which could be likely...REAL LIKELY.!
It just bothers me...his way of thinking. Who does he think he's fooling? While you call me "babe" and tell me how afraid you are of losing your marriage, your family and telling me I WANT TO HAVE WITH YOU WHAT I KEEP DREAMING OF ABOUT US......you're telling whoever else how much you want the samething with them. :rolls eyes:
You know, I am not STUPID where it comes to you. Remember, I've been playing your game a lot longer than anyone else in your life. You say your, "I'm sorries *which I have YET TO EVER RECEIVE from you* and say all the right things, just to have who ever you feel will melt like butter in your words.
And tho I am past the denial part of you...which is telling myself that i know that he means everything that he says or the finally he's going to make that change for me. Here I've been with him for 6 years and he hasn't changed. Not after all the threats for leaving, not after even packing up lil mama as a baby and leaving *only to return after i had cooled off*, not after he's oldest son was born & surely not even after double trouble #2's heart surgery. So at this point what would make anyone think that he would change for them....when he can't even do it to save the marriage with me he says he's so afraid of loosing or when he continues to play his game on "her".
For her I feel so horrible. Tho these days we aren't friends *even tho I miss her and her friendship terribly* I feel awful that she was sucked in by him & his game just as I have been all these years. I'm just glad tho that there isn't anything holding her in a relationship to him other than a hurt heart that wishes he could/would be a better man. As I know who she is...I know she has more to offer a person and that she deserves to be treated with more respect & more love & care than she has been given by any other person in her life. For the exception of one person that comes to mind and to see them together in the past......they made a "perfect" fit. And should you come across this entry Em's I know if you think about it you know who I am talking about.
Tho I can admit there are days that for the sake of me & the kiddlets I WANT TO BELIEVE HIS WORDS. But that's the deal...they are only words. :SIGHS: :/
i have so many icons below b/c i couldn't figure which one fit perfect..so these all fit perfect to me.