floating thoughts..
a little bitty. i think. i am tired. my contacts hurt my head. and i had a long day at work. i fell asleep before. but shawn.. nicely awoke me. mmm. havent in a while. it was nice to be alone. i enjoyed it. my neck and back and feet hurts oh so. i am watching ed, edd, and eddy. funnnie. idk. its almost midnight. i am talking to the lovely lauren. awwe. she's a doll. love to you. i feel sleepy.
work was tired. a fast paced day. alot of people buying shrek 2. people were going nuts. haha. and like some people are so mean, and walmart cashes checks. gay. idk. sillyness.
i dont know what to write. i seen my aunt dawn today. i havent seen really any of my family. not that it bothers me, but i miss everyone. specially my mom. i know. and like idk. i just dont like to be home. i love it with shawn. even though we dont see each other as much.. but i need the money. i am going to try and work alot. so i can get my mom and shawn something really good. and other peoples that mean lots to me. <3
like i love shawn to death, but sometime he makes me feel so horrible. cause i didnt want to stay at his dads while he left when we both could of went. but he didnt want me to go.. well thats what it seemed. then he blamed it on me. idk. i love him so much. and he calls me a bitch all the time. and like i could be dead tired and almost sleeping having to wake up at 6am. and he'll be on his laptop and he'll ask me to go all the way downstairs and get him a drink. and i will cause i love him. and not cause i am a slave but i would like it if someone got me something to drink when i was feeling lazy and thirsty. idk. and like i still feel weird going downstairs and going through the coboards and stuff. idk. i just do and shawn's like blah blah blah and i'm not playing games with you. he doesnt know it, but he made me cry the other night.. idk. i love him so much thou. more than he'll ever know. and i just needed to get somethings out. and like he makes me feel so bad, like he doesnt want me here sometimes. but i dont want to leave. i dont want to go home. i want to be with him. is there somthing wrong with me.. can i let go.. i can. but not at night/sleep time. idk. i cant help but need to feel the warmth of his body next to mine. idk. i love him. so much. Shawn.. be with me always? .. cause i love you.
well i am tired, i need a drink, to brush my teeth, and cuddle under the covers.. so.. good night all.
idk. its werid. i have thoughts but i dont know what they are.. they are kind of just floating around in my head. its tough. idk. float. float..
weird.. =/