You Know You're From Hawaii When...
You can understand and speak PIDGIN english.
You go to dinner and "make one plate" with all the extra food leftover.
You automatically take off your shoes in people's homes.
You wear rubber slippers to the beach.
You eat rice every single day.
It's "shave ice" not"snow cones".
When you know NEVER to turn your back facing the ocean.
You know what ukus are and have had them at least once before when you was one little keiki.
You've been to almost all of the other islands.
You get impatient with all of those bikers on the road that came from Haleakala.
When someone says to "dress up" it means one nice aloha shirt and jeans.
You eat coconuts straight from the shell - and drink the juice.
You went to the War Memorial Stadium parking lot to learn how to drive.
You've worked in the pineapple fields.
You know where all the creepy places (like burial sites) are in the island
You know you aren't supposed to whistle at night time, cross your chopsticks, or stick your fork straight out of your rice.
You have highlighted hair.
You eat Arare.
You know what "tutu" means.
You learned to play the ukulele in elementary school.
It's SHOYU, not soy sauce.
To you, sushi means sushi, not RAW FISH!
You eat malasadas
You have a billion pairs of slippers in front your door when your family gets together
Your house has residue from the salty ocean air.
You eat portuguese sausage, eggs, and rice for breakfast.
You buy large quantities of toilet paper in case there’s a longshoreman strike.
You don't understand why anyone would buy less than a 20 lb bag of rice...
You would serve spam as a meat for dinner...
You can taste the difference between teriyaki and kal-bi
You know why there are alphabets on trees on graduation day
You know what lei day is.
You know what the "stink eye" is; and how to give it.
You can correctly pronouce kalanianaole, kalakaua and aiea
You know what a "Huli Huli Chicken" is.
You can name 3 varieties of mangos.
You know the difference between being hapa and being hapai
You give directions using mauka and makai.
You know what it takes to get into kamehameha school.
You say, "Nori" not seaweed paper.
You say "Brah" not "Bro".
You know why Sharks Cove is called Sharks Cove.
Your jokes are about Portugese not Polish.
You know what "Morgan's Corner " is ... (And it still scares you!)
You think 70 degrees is freezing cold
You call it "saimin" not "Top Ramen"
The surf report is on your speed dial...
Rainbow Drive-Inn is a special date.
You know pineapples don't grow in trees.
When you hear the words "fund raiser", you know it means Zippy's Chili
You have said "wat, owe you money?", "karang your alas", or "dakine"
You call public transportation "da BUS"
You go to Neiman Marcus "jus fo look"
The mainland people no can understand your language.
You eat mango with shoyu, vinegar, and pepper
You like ume, daikon, and kim chee better than pickles.
You never understood why adding pineapple and ham to a pizza made it Hawaiian to the rest of the world
You have a separate circuit breaker for your rice cooker
You measure the water for the rice by the knuckle of your index finger
The condiments at the dinner table are shoyu, ketchup, chili peppah watah, kimchee, takuwan, Hawaiian salt and pickled onion
You go to Maui and your luggage home includes potato chips, manju, cream puffs, guri-guri and fresh saimin from Sam Sato's
A balanced meal has three starches: rice, macaroni and bread
You call everyone older than you "Aunty" or "Uncle" even though they aren't related to you
Your philosophy is "Bumbai"
You are barefoot in most of you elementary school pictures.
Your only suit is a bathing suit.
You drive barefoot.
You feel guilt leaving a get-together without helping clean up.
The idea of taking something from a heiau is unthinkable.
You'd rather drag out the compressor and fill that leaking tire every single morning than have it fixed.
The only time you honk your horn is once a year during the safety check.
You can live and let live with a smile in your heart.
Nobody is sure exactly where "north" is.
Your cousin is Japanese-Chinese-French-Filipino-Korean-Scottish-Portuguese-Hawaiian, plus some stuff too manini to mention
You watch your favorite shows "on top the TV"
The best cooks all use lots of mayonnaise
An approaching hurricane means only one thing - surf's up, brah!
"You like beef" has nothing to do with what's for dinner
Beans are the perfect condiment for ice cream
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Hawaii.
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