Why...
Why can't I listen to people when what they say makes sense... or why do I listen to them when my gut says not to? I'm sitting here at McDonald's because we'd made plans for him to come out here today and this morning he called and said that he didn't feel well and that he was going to sleep for a while before coming out here... it's now almost 5 and I felt the need to check on him, so I drove out here, paid for a 2 hour sitting and got online specifically to check on him. Can we say "lack of trust?!" *sigh* Sunday he asked me to be his girlfriend, then Wednesday he took it back claiming that his dad was still on his case about staying single until he got his grades up (which is technically true 'cause I've heard his dad say stuff to him about it). I understood before that that was a hurdle for this, but HE was the one who took the step, if I had said, "But you don't want anything serious right now." He would have taken that as me not wanting to be with him... *rolls eyes* Wednesday he also conveniently made plans to hang out with the ex and CONVENIENTLY saw her as turning back into the person she was when they first met so now he wants to "see how things go" with that, but of course it's not going to be anything serious "not like us"... Gag me. Bah! Is it sad that I'm holding on for selfish reasons? I miss having someone there and if I let go then it's back to just me. *sigh* But if I continue to hold on I keep pushing other people away and potential other opportunities. Alright, I should go.
Enough for now.
Enough for now.