If you lead, I might follow, J2, AU, 9/19
Gorgeous header by the lovely smiledrawinglie
Title: If you lead, I might follow
Written by: ellydee27
Fandom/Pairing: CW RPS/J2. AU. Jared/Jensen, Mike/Jeffrey. Other characters: Tom, Chris and more
Rating: This chapter: R, story as a whole: NC17
Word count: ~3050/ 54,850
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything and I don’t mean any harm. Just having fun.
Beta: The oh,so hard-working jolinarmalkshur -you’re a hero for taking this on! Any remaining errors are mine.
Warnings: Homophobic parents, mentions of past abusive relationship (briefly).
Summary: Jared Padalecki, 19, dance student, recently moved from Texas to New York with his upperclass family. Struggling with the expectations from his family as well as with certain dance moves, he takes a Hip Hop class where he meets Jensen, 23, a stripper with all the confidence in the world. A not-so-classic tale of two worlds colliding, where Jared’s the shy one, Jensen has the coolest friends in the world and neither of them know what they’re doing.
A/N: Sorry about the wait guys, RL kicked my butt last week...hope you enjoy :)
~~*~~
Previous chapters:
"Chapter one"
"Chapter two"
"Chapter three"
"Chapter four"
"Chapter five"
"Chapter six"
"Chapter seven"
"Chapter eight"
Jensen
It’s a surprisingly good night after that; everyone’s relaxed, having fun and taking turns losing to Mike.
When Sharon knocks on the door and enters the room, Jensen checks his wristwatch quickly, his eyebrows raising when he sees that it’s already 11.30.
“Hey, boys. Are y’all enjoying yourself?” She asks, receiving four sets of affirmative replies.
“I know it might not be that late for you kids yet, but I think me and Gerry will be heading off to bed. Jared, can you make sure they take cabs when they leave, it’s really too late to be on the subway. There’s cab fare on the table in the hall.” She looks around the room and continues. “Thank you for visiting, I hope to see y’all again.” Sharon smiles sweetly, locking eyes with Jensen.
“Thank you for having us, ma’am.” Jensen says smoothly, all charm.
When she closes the door behind her, Tom and Mike has a questioning look on their faces.
“Laying it on pretty thick there, Jensen?”
“Can’t hurt to be nice, can it, Jared?” Jensen turns to Jared after a quick glare at the other boys.
“Um…no, I guess. I think you had her at the flowers though. She already said earlier that she hoped you‘d come back to ‘see us’.” Jared says the last two words with a wrinkled nose.
Jensen sniggers, but it’s Mike who gets the next word.
“Great work, Jensen, already making headway with the in-laws,” he jokes dryly.
Jensen scowls in response, which only makes Mike snicker, satisfied with getting a reaction.
“So, should we start heading home? I have to work in the afternoon tomorrow.” It’s Tom who changes the subject.
“Sure, man, let’s go.” Mike gets up, brushes chips from his slacks and looks at Jared. “Maybe we could call for a cab?”
Jared gets up, too. “Yeah, how many do you need?”
“We can share one, we’re all in the sort-of-same direction, right?”
Jared nods, goes to the inter-com on the wall and asks the doorman to catch a cab.
“Alright, thanks for coming, guys,” he says when he turns around, his friends getting up from their seats, preparing to leave.
“It was fun,” Tom says enthusiastically, “we should do it again. I’d offer that you could come to my place, but four siblings doesn’t really leave much room for any guests.”
“And I live in a room, basically, it’s got a bed and a TV and that’s it.” Mike states.
“Well, you can come to ours, Chris might be there, but he’s cool.” Jensen offers, as they’ve moved out in the hall and are putting on their coats.
They make plans to visit Jensen two weeks after, since Mike and Jensen have to work the next weekend. Soon, the boys are going out through the door, but Jensen hangs back.
“So…can you hang out after next week’s class then? Now that they’ve met us?”
“Yup,“ Jared nods, a grin forming on his face, portraying his excitement. “See you then? And thanks…for being so cool tonight.”
“It’s all good. It was fun. Sleep tight, Jay.” Jensen hesitates for a second, then peeks behind Jared to make sure they’re alone before leaning up for a quick kiss. The brief contact makes Jared smile even wider, and Jensen returns it heartily before turning to leave.
Just before Jensen reaches the elevator, he turns and runs back, grabbing the door and holding it open before Jared has time to close it.
“Hey…can I have your number?”
Jared shakes his head in amusement. “We’re still doing the backwards-thing?”
“Well, yeah.” Jensen grins.
Jared grabs a pen from the table and writes his number in Jensen’s palm. Jensen watches as he does, the touch tickling him and putting a smile on his face. Jared lets go of his hand, squeezing it one more time before Jensen winks and runs down the hall to catch up with the others.
~~*~~
Jared
“Good work, people, excellent duets, you’ve really been working hard today. Are you starting to feel like hip-hoppers yet?” Shane asks his students, looking around the room for response.
The class shares a laugh, making various gestures and grimaces at each other.
“Well, you might not feel it completely, but you’ve all made a great progress, that’s for sure. Jared, you‘re staying behind tonight, so remember to shut off the lights, okay?” Jared nods from the back of the room, signaling that he got the message. “Alright, see you all next week.”
After a round of applause, the room clears pretty quickly, Tom and Mike competing over making the most suggestive grimaces at Jensen and Jared.
Jensen scowls at them until the door’s shut behind them, leaving him and Jared alone.
“Jeez, could they be more obvious and stupid about this?” Jared sighs and abandons his task of stretching, leaning against the mirrored wall instead.
Jensen shakes his head as he finds a seat next to him, close, but not touching. “Nope, they’re really enjoying our misery.”
“You think it’s that bad?” Jared avoids Jensen’s eyes as he asks, a tinge of hurt in his soft voice.
Jensen shakes his head again. “No…not like I’m suffering. I’m sort of freaked out, and I’m definitely over- analyzing things, but I think this is worse for you.”
Jared frowns. “Why do you say that? Aren’t we in this together?”
“No, no, I don’t mean it like that,” Jensen soothes, reaching out to pat Jared’s knee reassuringly. “Actually, I’m pretty sure I feel more for you than you do for me, or whatever, but I mean like…you have more to deal with. At least I know that I’m gay for sure, so there’s no surprise there. And I don’t have parents to worry about. And then there’s the fact that you couldn’t hurt a fly if you tried.”
Jared is momentarily amused and flattered by the last statement, before the previous point sinks in. His parents finding out…that would be bad.
“See what I mean?” Jensen asks, though it’s obvious on Jared’s serious grimace that he does. “You have thought about these things, right?”
“Eh…I think I’ve thought more about just…you. And if you felt the same as me.”
“Didn’t I say I did already, last week?” Jensen sounds surprised, his eyebrows pinched together in confusion.
Jared blushes. “I guess…I think it’s sorta hard to believe,” he mumbles, Jensen squinting in concentration as he tries to catch the words.
When Jensen’s sure that he heard the younger man clearly, he lets out a self-deprecating scoff.
“Yeah,” he snorts, “‘cause I’m such a catch.”
“Come on, you know you could get anyone. Why would you want me?” Jared asks, doubt and frustration underlining his quiet voice.
Jensen’s nothing but serious when he replies, wanting to make sure Jared understands.
“Look, I know that what I do…and what I’m like, it makes people see me a certain way. I mean, a stripper? We’re only good for one thing, and that’s a quick fuck. And that’s been fine by me until now, I’m not going for sympathy or anything here. But you see my point, right?”
“Not really.” Jared shakes his head, disbelievingly. “Or well, yeah, I see the point about people’s conception in general, but not how it applies to me? You must know I don‘t see you as…that?”
“You can’t even say the word, Jared, of course I don’t think you want me for a fuck.” Jensen accentuates the last word, a wicked glint in his eyes. “It’s just…you’re from such a different world, and your family would never accept…well, me. And I don’t even know if you’ve gotten over the whole being-gay thing.”
“I’m not over it, I haven’t even told anyone except you and Tom. But I’ve accepted it?” The questioning tone betrays his doubts on the matter. “Okay, maybe I’m still freaking out, and I have no idea what to do with it…I always thought I’d just follow in my brother’s footsteps and get engaged to some girl, and up until six weeks ago that was my plan. And I don’t think it’s a possibility anymore.” Jared looks down to the floor, picks invisible lint from his sweats nervously.
“You really planned on marrying a girl?”
Jared nods, not meeting Jensen’s questioning glance.
“Even though you were pretty sure you were gay. God, we’re a messed up pair, Jay.” A snort accompanies the sentiment. “How was that supposed to work then?”
Jared shrugs, and seemingly tries to crawl into himself.
“I don’t know. I just figured it would be easiest.”
“But now you’ve changed your mind? Because of me.”
Another nod.
“Wow, I don’t know what to say, Jared. I’m sorry?”
“I don’t blame you.”
Jensen sighs in relief at the determined reply, before he tries to make sense of the situation once again.
“Okay. So we’re agreeing that we both still feel this…between us, and that we want more than just sex, and that neither of us knows what the hell we’re doing. Well, that’s just awesome.”
Jared turns his head then, resting it on his bent knees as he finally locks eyes with Jensen.
“I know it’s not ideal, but it could be worse, too, right?”
Jensen just raises an eyebrow in reply, silently asking ’how‘, waiting for his reasoning.
“I could be sixteen?”
Jensen fakes a shocked expression.
“Jared, is that an attempt at a joke?” He gets out before he succumbs to the laughter Jared’s surprising joke triggered. Jared joins him with a chuckle of his own. When the laughter quiets down, their eyes lock, and the force pulling them towards each other may be invisible, but it’s definitely real.
Five seconds later Jared’s on his back on the floor, stretched out with his arms above his head, the image of surrender. Jensen’s on all fours above him, brushing the bangs out of his face before leaning down for a kiss. Jared’s taken aback by the sudden rush of desire running through him, by the fluid movements with which Jensen pushed him down on the floor. Looking into green eyes filled with fire, a spark shoots straight through Jared and makes him hard in seconds.
Jensen kisses him intently, Jared welcoming the wanting mouth, opening up for him eagerly. Their tongues battle for dominance, a fight Jared quickly loses. His mind is racing with incoherent thoughts of want, need, desperation and intense admiration for the man he simply can‘t get enough of.
Both men are breathing heavily a minute later, and Jared can’t help but letting out a groan when Jensen shifts, realigning himself on top of Jared’s longer frame. Suddenly there’s perfect friction on his groin, a matching erection grinding against his. He opens eyes he didn’t realize he’s kept closed, wanting to see the gorgeous man who‘s causing his pleasure. The sight of Jensen with his lips parted, watching him intensely is too much for Jared to handle and he shuts them again, trying to maintain a modicum of control.
“Hey. Look at me, Jared.” Jensen stops his undulating movement, and Jared forces himself to obey, gazing dazedly at the source of the softly spoken words.
“Hey.” Jensen says, hoarse voice and searching gaze. “This is okay, right?”
Jared simply nods, eagerly, not in a position to form coherent word. His eyes are glued to pink, swollen lips, and Jensen seems to understand what he wants, as he leans down to continue the passionate kiss. Matching groans are heard as the grinding of hips fills them with a need for release, bringing them closer to their climaxes with every thrust.
Jared gives in to the feeling, almost delirious with the overwhelming desire to get even closer to his lover. His hands reach around to explore, trailing up and down a muscled back, lifting the soft t-shirt to gain access to naked skin. Jensen’s skin is impossibly smooth, like silk, even with the hard muscles underneath, but slick with a thin layer of perspiration. Being allowed to touch makes his fingers tingle, and his head is dizzy with the knowledge that his touch is wanted. That Jensen wants Jared’s inexperienced hands on him, maybe even as much as he wants Jensen…The thought that it’s too good to be true is Jared’s last coherent one before the pleasure is too much, and he loses control completely, coming with Jensen’s lips against his.
~~*~~
Jensen
The sounds Jared makes when he comes are indescribable, his moans and whimpers like a symphony as he gets lost in the ecstasy in a way experienced partners never do. The thought that no one else has done this to Jared before, that he’s the first, the only, is what triggers Jensen’s own orgasm. Looking at Jared’s beautiful, flushed face twisted in pleasure takes him over the edge, and he pushes against lean hips one last time as he shudders through his climax.
Jensen flops down straight after, exhausted and spent, draping himself across Jared’s strong body. He scoots down to find a more comfortable position for them both and ends up resting his head on Jared’s wide chest, listening to the sound of his rapidly beating heart. His hand is placed on Jared’s muscled arm, stroking gently. Jared’s still panting heavily, and Jensen unconsciously taps the beat of his thumping heart with his fingers.
They lay in silence while their breathing slows down, their climaxes making them both feel relaxed, drowsy.
“You’re way too good at that.” Jared says, voice close to a whisper.
Jensen smiles into the soft t-shirt, smelling the musky blend of cologne, sweat, and underlining it - something uniquely Jared.
“Well…”
“No cocky comments, thanks.” Jared’s voice comes out sounding tired, spent as he is after his intense orgasm.
Jensen swallows down his original reply about having a lot of practice, and considers his response.
“I don’t know what to say then, cocky is pretty much the name of my game.” He settles for honesty. “I’m sorry?”
“Stop apologizing. I might not have your experience, but I’m an adult, and I wanted it. You are sort of distracting though,” he finishes with a small chuckle.
Jensen takes a second to wonder where this confident man came from, and where the innocent, shy boy went.
“I know, I’m corrupting you.” Jensen joins in on the chuckling. “So, that’s what you want, then, that we keep doing…this?”
“Yeah, I think so. I’d like more, but I don‘t know how it could work, seems kinda impossible… don’t you think?”
Jensen sighs, nodding against the warm body underneath his chin.
“It’s really your choice Jared. I’m not the one who stands to lose from this. I don’t have a family to be concerned about.”
“But you’d like more too, right, not just more…of this?”
“Jared, you can’t even say it, I don’t really expect you to be ready to fuck any time soon.” Jensen sniggers, enjoying making his lover uncomfortable.
“I can say fuck.” Jared mutters, trying uselessly to shift away.
“Oh, you can? Just not when it’s the actual sense of the word?” Jensen’s continues, making Jared groan and wiggle a little more. Jensen moves again, putting his weight on his elbow and getting up, now able to look Jared in the eyes. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop. But yeah, I think I’d like more, even though we would probably suck at it.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe we would be extremely good at it?” Jared smiles carefully, looking out through his bangs.
“Sure, let’s go for optimism, always a good choice.” Jensen responds dryly.
“Come on, Jensen, where’s that happy-go-lucky guy I fell for?” Jared teases, biting his lower lip and bringing out his dimples.
“He got turned down by a skinny teenager.” Jensen mock-pouts.
“I am not skinny. I’m lean,.” Jared replies determinedly.
“Sure, Twig, whatever you say.” Jared sticks his tongue out at Jensen, letting him know what he thinks of his attempt at a joke.
“But seriously. We just keep doing this? That’s the plan? Won’t that be like…Mike and Jeff?” Jared asks, uncertainty audible in the last words.
“Yeah, I guess it will be.” Jensen sighs, dejectedly. “But I don’t see any other options. At least we can hang out now, as friends, right?”
Jared sighs. “I’m sorry, Jensen. I’m the one who makes this difficult, I know that. You have to tell me though, when it’s not…worth it anymore. I know it’s a lot to ask.”
“I wouldn’t agree to it if I didn’t want to, Jared. But…you’re thinking it’s a monogamous thing, right? Just you and me?”
Jared nods. “If it’s okay with you.”
“Does that make you my boyfriend?”
Instead of replying, Jared plants a kiss on Jensen’s head, and then clutches his lover tight, giving him a hug that leaves him breathless.
“Yes. Definitely. As long as you‘ll have me.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, kid.” Jensen warns, but his voice is warm, filled with emotion. Feelings of contentment and excitement spreads throughout his sated body and he sighs heavily against Jared‘s frame. The idea of having a boyfriend had never been something he’d wanted and here he is, unable to wipe the smile of his face because Jared had said yes.
“I’m feeling pretty sure about it.” Jared replies, smile shining through his words.
“Good. ‘Cause I’ll hold you to it.”
They lay there together, enjoying the comfortable silence until the clock on the wall indicates that Jensen needs to leave for work. Still linked together, hands roaming across the other’s body, they share a heated kiss, exchanging happy smiles before reluctantly saying goodnight.
~~*~~
"Chapter ten"