Just Another Day of Dieting and Trying To Entertain Myself
Yesterday I read a book called "The Prince of Tides" by Pat Conroy. It's like nearly 700 pages in the paperback version I have (physical copy of the book! GASP!), but I just read it from start to finish. I was feeling bizarrely tired and lethargic yesterday. Even though I had plenty of things I should have done, I ended up staying most of the day in bed (in my pajamas) reading or just laying in bed. I tried to nap, unsuccessfully. It took until Brian got home, and I finished the book, before I was able to sort of pulling myself together to do some of the things I needed.
One of those things was going out for two walks. It was warm and sunny most of the day (and I didn't go outside--that's how you know I wasn't feeling quite right), but I didn't go out until it was getting towards evening. Brian and I took a walk after dinner around 8:30pm. I'm not sure I managed a full hour, but at least I got around 40 minutes, which I suppose is a lot better than nothing at all. It's very important that I get more exercise to help my body use up the glucose in my blood, and also to help me get into better shape for birth and labor.
The other was setting up the rest of the Plan for the nutritionist. I should be hearing from them soon to better make an appointment. It's sort of like...sigh. Between this and the chiropractor, I feel as more and more money is just slipping away.
Today I weighed myself, and came in at 149lbs. This means I haven't gained any weight for a full 3 weeks. I would worry, but I'm not smaller anywhere that matters (like my stomach/belly). I think my thighs are returning to some sort of shape not resembling gelatinous ice cream cones (moving more towards the Leg Of Lamb look instead, perhaps?). I also think that between the diet and the exercise, I have cut back quite a bit on the amount of sugar that I get in a day (though, to be honest, I'm shocked that it's made such a difference with my weight, since it's not like I was gorging on sugar or not exercising at all). Plus, I know from experience that walking just one to two hours a day (and the occasional 40 minute session instead) doesn't really slim you down that fast. Especially post 18-years-old.
However, I think the combination has slowed my weight gain. If I hadn't made any changes and this happened, I'd probably be panicking and calling my Temporary Midwife right now. But, we have made quite a few changes. And, if I gain only one pound a week from here on out, I'd still be on schedule to gain 35lbs or so by my due date--which is the top end of the recommended weight gain for my previous size. So, if anything, it's probably helped slow my weight gain down to a better rate, and prevented me from getting too large (which, now, is going to help prevent C Monkey from getting too large as well). My diabetes also explains why I was suddenly gaining much more, much faster than before with the same diet.
I've also noticed that I've been able to walk better--longer and faster--already. It really just takes a few days to get into the swing of it. I'm rocking the 3.0-3.5 speed for at least 20 minutes at the gym (meaning walking around 3 miles per hour). I hang out mostly around 2.5-2.8 though. And since I progress up from 1.8 and then head back down to it in a curve, my average tends to be around 2.1 or so. But, I'm still covering 2+ miles each go, which is a good sign. Especially considering that I am not only less fit, but am carrying around a much larger amount of weight than I'm used to, with a being that is crushing my internal organs (my stomach is actually now right underneath my ribcage, squashed more horizontal than anything, which will only get worse and worse until the baby "drops" down into my pelvis). I still can hardly handle inclines though. I get amazingly out of breath, very fast, and I slow down incredibly.
Emotionally, I've been feeling like I've been growing closer and closer to C Monkey. She's not even out of the womb yet, and I'm already bonding. Part of it has been inspired by the fact that the fact that my body could be not nurturing her properly has made me fear for her safety, and I've felt more protective, and therefore more loving, about her. It's enough so that I know that I won't be able to survive as healthily as my mom managed if something went wrong with her. My mom lost her baby after carrying her full term when she was my age, and while it's always been something that's a part of her history, it's not something that has ever made her cry or sad. She felt, even then, that it was for the best; she felt she wasn't ready, and Elia wasn't either.
Me? I will not be feeling that way. I just don't understand how something could go wrong, because I love her and want her to be safe, happy, and healthy. Though, the realist in me knows that it's just possible. Of course, something could just as easily happen to me in the meantime that could hurt/kill us both. Heck, I'm still far more likely to get into a car accident between now and then than have anything life threatening happen to us during or before labor or birth. But, you better believe that I am getting as close to praying as I ever do these days that everything will just work out fine.
Also, since I decided at the beginning of this pregnancy to try to document what was going on as clearly as possible, I should mention some of the other smaller things going on that have hit as the third trimester rounds out. I've had some very minor swelling (seriously, I'm amazingly lucky that I've had literally the bare minimum so far, since GD makes pre-eclampsia more likely, and GD tends to make you swell more, and one of the first and best signs of pre-eclampsia is sudden swelling, which is harder to catch if you've already swollen from the diabetes), mostly in the expected places: my fingers, my legs, and possibly my face.
My fingers have swelled enough that my rings make small imprints on my fingers, though not enough to worry me or make me take them off (yet). My legs have swollen only visibly to me because I've practically been obsessively staring at them every night, and there has been the tiniest amount of thickening around my ankle, enough so that after walking, if my socks are "tight" then they leave imprints (I've avoided all tight socks for most of the pregnancy to avoid this). My face is hard to call--it could be some minor swelling from water retention, or it could just be a few extra fat storages. I tend to gain weight first in my face, and I've definitely gained at least SOME extra fat by now.
I'm also not sleeping as easily as I was before, and it's getting more and more difficult to find a good position to sleep. I finally have been unable to rest comfortably on my back, after going weeks longer than most other people find it comfortable. Most of the problem is that C Monkey apparently HATES it when I go onto my back--it's a guaranteed way to get her to kick or punch. She'll seriously just hit me until I roll over, and then immediately stop and go back to sleeping or whatever once I do. But, the other thing is that it's just no longer as comfortable, partly because I can feel the pressure of her pressing into me. So, I'm stuck on my two sides, and on my side I run the risk of sleeping too deeply and leaning too far onto my belly, which wakes C Monkey up, which in turn wakes ME up, and we repeat with the other side.
To make this even more difficult is that even though I'm getting the right amount of hours of sleep according to the clock by how long I've been in bed, I'm obviously not sleeping as deeply or soundly, because I'm still often a little sleepy/tired throughout the day, even when I'm feeling pretty good. I recognize this fatigue from the first trimester as well, though this is a pale comparison to the crippling sensation of those earlier months. This is more of a nagging feeling that I should be resting, almost like what I went through for most of my entire college career. The first trimester was much more like high school, where the feeling of exhaustion was just the regular feeling.
To the good, because I feel I should mention these more often in what I'm NOT experiencing, is that I still haven't had any of the bowel troubles that plague most women during this time: no constipation, no hemorrhoids, no diarrhea. I have been managing to avoid acid reflux 6 out of 7 days a week. Brian's been working hard on massaging me often so I've experienced much less backpain than I would have without his help. Still no stretch marks, anywhere. No itching, either, probably for the same reason, as I've been careful to oil my stretching skin often. I also use all natural products, remember, so I may already just be doing a better job at keeping my skin from getting too dry in the first place.
Other than that, I suppose everything else is going normally. I have a few phone calls I need to make, and a few chores to get done.
One of those things was going out for two walks. It was warm and sunny most of the day (and I didn't go outside--that's how you know I wasn't feeling quite right), but I didn't go out until it was getting towards evening. Brian and I took a walk after dinner around 8:30pm. I'm not sure I managed a full hour, but at least I got around 40 minutes, which I suppose is a lot better than nothing at all. It's very important that I get more exercise to help my body use up the glucose in my blood, and also to help me get into better shape for birth and labor.
The other was setting up the rest of the Plan for the nutritionist. I should be hearing from them soon to better make an appointment. It's sort of like...sigh. Between this and the chiropractor, I feel as more and more money is just slipping away.
Today I weighed myself, and came in at 149lbs. This means I haven't gained any weight for a full 3 weeks. I would worry, but I'm not smaller anywhere that matters (like my stomach/belly). I think my thighs are returning to some sort of shape not resembling gelatinous ice cream cones (moving more towards the Leg Of Lamb look instead, perhaps?). I also think that between the diet and the exercise, I have cut back quite a bit on the amount of sugar that I get in a day (though, to be honest, I'm shocked that it's made such a difference with my weight, since it's not like I was gorging on sugar or not exercising at all). Plus, I know from experience that walking just one to two hours a day (and the occasional 40 minute session instead) doesn't really slim you down that fast. Especially post 18-years-old.
However, I think the combination has slowed my weight gain. If I hadn't made any changes and this happened, I'd probably be panicking and calling my Temporary Midwife right now. But, we have made quite a few changes. And, if I gain only one pound a week from here on out, I'd still be on schedule to gain 35lbs or so by my due date--which is the top end of the recommended weight gain for my previous size. So, if anything, it's probably helped slow my weight gain down to a better rate, and prevented me from getting too large (which, now, is going to help prevent C Monkey from getting too large as well). My diabetes also explains why I was suddenly gaining much more, much faster than before with the same diet.
I've also noticed that I've been able to walk better--longer and faster--already. It really just takes a few days to get into the swing of it. I'm rocking the 3.0-3.5 speed for at least 20 minutes at the gym (meaning walking around 3 miles per hour). I hang out mostly around 2.5-2.8 though. And since I progress up from 1.8 and then head back down to it in a curve, my average tends to be around 2.1 or so. But, I'm still covering 2+ miles each go, which is a good sign. Especially considering that I am not only less fit, but am carrying around a much larger amount of weight than I'm used to, with a being that is crushing my internal organs (my stomach is actually now right underneath my ribcage, squashed more horizontal than anything, which will only get worse and worse until the baby "drops" down into my pelvis). I still can hardly handle inclines though. I get amazingly out of breath, very fast, and I slow down incredibly.
Emotionally, I've been feeling like I've been growing closer and closer to C Monkey. She's not even out of the womb yet, and I'm already bonding. Part of it has been inspired by the fact that the fact that my body could be not nurturing her properly has made me fear for her safety, and I've felt more protective, and therefore more loving, about her. It's enough so that I know that I won't be able to survive as healthily as my mom managed if something went wrong with her. My mom lost her baby after carrying her full term when she was my age, and while it's always been something that's a part of her history, it's not something that has ever made her cry or sad. She felt, even then, that it was for the best; she felt she wasn't ready, and Elia wasn't either.
Me? I will not be feeling that way. I just don't understand how something could go wrong, because I love her and want her to be safe, happy, and healthy. Though, the realist in me knows that it's just possible. Of course, something could just as easily happen to me in the meantime that could hurt/kill us both. Heck, I'm still far more likely to get into a car accident between now and then than have anything life threatening happen to us during or before labor or birth. But, you better believe that I am getting as close to praying as I ever do these days that everything will just work out fine.
Also, since I decided at the beginning of this pregnancy to try to document what was going on as clearly as possible, I should mention some of the other smaller things going on that have hit as the third trimester rounds out. I've had some very minor swelling (seriously, I'm amazingly lucky that I've had literally the bare minimum so far, since GD makes pre-eclampsia more likely, and GD tends to make you swell more, and one of the first and best signs of pre-eclampsia is sudden swelling, which is harder to catch if you've already swollen from the diabetes), mostly in the expected places: my fingers, my legs, and possibly my face.
My fingers have swelled enough that my rings make small imprints on my fingers, though not enough to worry me or make me take them off (yet). My legs have swollen only visibly to me because I've practically been obsessively staring at them every night, and there has been the tiniest amount of thickening around my ankle, enough so that after walking, if my socks are "tight" then they leave imprints (I've avoided all tight socks for most of the pregnancy to avoid this). My face is hard to call--it could be some minor swelling from water retention, or it could just be a few extra fat storages. I tend to gain weight first in my face, and I've definitely gained at least SOME extra fat by now.
I'm also not sleeping as easily as I was before, and it's getting more and more difficult to find a good position to sleep. I finally have been unable to rest comfortably on my back, after going weeks longer than most other people find it comfortable. Most of the problem is that C Monkey apparently HATES it when I go onto my back--it's a guaranteed way to get her to kick or punch. She'll seriously just hit me until I roll over, and then immediately stop and go back to sleeping or whatever once I do. But, the other thing is that it's just no longer as comfortable, partly because I can feel the pressure of her pressing into me. So, I'm stuck on my two sides, and on my side I run the risk of sleeping too deeply and leaning too far onto my belly, which wakes C Monkey up, which in turn wakes ME up, and we repeat with the other side.
To make this even more difficult is that even though I'm getting the right amount of hours of sleep according to the clock by how long I've been in bed, I'm obviously not sleeping as deeply or soundly, because I'm still often a little sleepy/tired throughout the day, even when I'm feeling pretty good. I recognize this fatigue from the first trimester as well, though this is a pale comparison to the crippling sensation of those earlier months. This is more of a nagging feeling that I should be resting, almost like what I went through for most of my entire college career. The first trimester was much more like high school, where the feeling of exhaustion was just the regular feeling.
To the good, because I feel I should mention these more often in what I'm NOT experiencing, is that I still haven't had any of the bowel troubles that plague most women during this time: no constipation, no hemorrhoids, no diarrhea. I have been managing to avoid acid reflux 6 out of 7 days a week. Brian's been working hard on massaging me often so I've experienced much less backpain than I would have without his help. Still no stretch marks, anywhere. No itching, either, probably for the same reason, as I've been careful to oil my stretching skin often. I also use all natural products, remember, so I may already just be doing a better job at keeping my skin from getting too dry in the first place.
Other than that, I suppose everything else is going normally. I have a few phone calls I need to make, and a few chores to get done.