Cabin In The Woods
All right. There is no way (and I mean this--NO. WAY.) to review this movie without spoiling it for anyone who wants to go see it. I'm talking spoilers BEFORE THE TITLE of the movie type of spoilers, things I cannot even mention except to say that I love the way Joss Whedon writes dialogue (and Drew Goddard, who also wrote the film, and directed it).
I can say the following:
1. Every teen/college horror film stereotype you have ever seen will appear in this movie.
2. Every frightening monster you have ever thought, or thought about someone else thinking, will appear in this movie.*
3. Upwards of 3 actors who have previously worked with Joss Whedon will appear in this movie.
4. You will laugh at something after a major carnage (because the writers are simply THAT GOOD).
5. There will be a moment where someone says the line, "We should split up." And another character will reply, ".....REALLY? D=" Something I have been waiting for since the second horror film I ever saw.
That's about it. Literally anything else will be a terrible spoiler. I suppose I should add that I really enjoyed the film (and so did Brian), and so did a lot of people in the theater. There were more than a few screams and laughs (I contributed my fair share of both; Brian stoically held my hand through the scary parts). It's definitely worth seeing, even if you hate horror films. In fact, I would probably recommend it more if you usually hate horror films. And if you've ever, ever, EVER spoken to the characters in a horror movie (aloud or loudly in your head) saying NO DON'T DO THAT!!!
We had a really good time, especially since not only were our tickets free (been hoarding those things for more than a year now--we really don't do movies in theaters), but we also got a free "small" popcorn (since when is small so big that even though I ate until near bursting in the theater we still had to take home more than half?). I got Nerds and we got a "large" soda to share (since when is large almost the size of my TORSO?!), and felt a little over-sugared by the end. Also, if you're pregnant and watching this film, limit your drink intake. There were several times I leaked a little pee (once from fear, twice from laughter).
Afterwards, we sat in the car while I talked with my mom about random things. Then, we went to Hoyt Arboretum in hopes that the Cherry path would have lots of blooming cherry trees (I'm sure that 3 do not constitute the need to name the path "Cherry Trail" but that's MY opinion), which were disappointed. We did have a good walk, except for the part where we had to walk up a semi-steep incline and I thought I was going to die. I am so out of shape, in all the meanings of that word (also, amusing side note: at both the time when I was huffing and puffing from the "exercise" and at the most frightening parts of the movie, C Monkey was punching up a storm in my belly).
I end this post with another recommendation that if you are able, to go and see this movie while it's in theaters. I'd love to see more stuff by Joss Whedon get out there, and a great way to encourage that is to GO AND SEE THE MOVIE.
And if you're like me, and things can scare you in your brain even more than on the screen, I recommend seeing it in daylight. It's been enough hours that I should be able to go to sleep now. You know, while clinging onto Brian and huddling under the blankets. These will keep me safe.
*I looked, but neither of us saw at any point, a vampire. I think this is on purpose and a statement from the writers. It was the only one missing.
I can say the following:
1. Every teen/college horror film stereotype you have ever seen will appear in this movie.
2. Every frightening monster you have ever thought, or thought about someone else thinking, will appear in this movie.*
3. Upwards of 3 actors who have previously worked with Joss Whedon will appear in this movie.
4. You will laugh at something after a major carnage (because the writers are simply THAT GOOD).
5. There will be a moment where someone says the line, "We should split up." And another character will reply, ".....REALLY? D=" Something I have been waiting for since the second horror film I ever saw.
That's about it. Literally anything else will be a terrible spoiler. I suppose I should add that I really enjoyed the film (and so did Brian), and so did a lot of people in the theater. There were more than a few screams and laughs (I contributed my fair share of both; Brian stoically held my hand through the scary parts). It's definitely worth seeing, even if you hate horror films. In fact, I would probably recommend it more if you usually hate horror films. And if you've ever, ever, EVER spoken to the characters in a horror movie (aloud or loudly in your head) saying NO DON'T DO THAT!!!
We had a really good time, especially since not only were our tickets free (been hoarding those things for more than a year now--we really don't do movies in theaters), but we also got a free "small" popcorn (since when is small so big that even though I ate until near bursting in the theater we still had to take home more than half?). I got Nerds and we got a "large" soda to share (since when is large almost the size of my TORSO?!), and felt a little over-sugared by the end. Also, if you're pregnant and watching this film, limit your drink intake. There were several times I leaked a little pee (once from fear, twice from laughter).
Afterwards, we sat in the car while I talked with my mom about random things. Then, we went to Hoyt Arboretum in hopes that the Cherry path would have lots of blooming cherry trees (I'm sure that 3 do not constitute the need to name the path "Cherry Trail" but that's MY opinion), which were disappointed. We did have a good walk, except for the part where we had to walk up a semi-steep incline and I thought I was going to die. I am so out of shape, in all the meanings of that word (also, amusing side note: at both the time when I was huffing and puffing from the "exercise" and at the most frightening parts of the movie, C Monkey was punching up a storm in my belly).
I end this post with another recommendation that if you are able, to go and see this movie while it's in theaters. I'd love to see more stuff by Joss Whedon get out there, and a great way to encourage that is to GO AND SEE THE MOVIE.
And if you're like me, and things can scare you in your brain even more than on the screen, I recommend seeing it in daylight. It's been enough hours that I should be able to go to sleep now. You know, while clinging onto Brian and huddling under the blankets. These will keep me safe.
*I looked, but neither of us saw at any point, a vampire. I think this is on purpose and a statement from the writers. It was the only one missing.