failed sun salutation
i just got off the mat and crept back into bed. told myself it was too cold in the room, that i was too depressed that even the thing that has sustained me so many times has now been mired by the dominiance of his prescence in my life. Made myself the victim, pretended that the decisions i've made haven't been highly influencial in where i find myself. Tell myself that i need family and people that i know will love me unconditionally. Then i remember, some 3 years ago didn't i have an emotional breakdown about how all love is conditional? That's right.
what a mess.
what a mess.