It's the adventures of THE GIRL WITH TOO MUCH TIME ON HER HANDS!
Yes, that's right, every Tuesday evening after 5:30, to 1:00 on Wednesday afternoon, this girl has TOO MUCH FREE TIME! She can spend it HOWEVER SHE WANTS! It's AMAZING!
This week she decided to spend her evening WALKING TO PETSMART! And after that, she decides to WALK TO TARGET! This means that she's walking a total of THREE MILES which is good because she doesn't get enough exercise.
But then! One hundred yards from Target she suddenly twists her right hip. What are our commentor's thoughts?
Three-Year-Old Commentor: It's the right hip because it's connected to the right leg.
That logic is UNREFUTABLE!
But it's too late now! There's nothing she can do but walk it off! And so she does! Limping! Horribly! To! The! Cereal! Aisle! Then she limps! Even! Worse! To the cash register.
Then, just when someone might think she has a hold on the situation, HER LEFT MIDDLE TOE'S TENDON FALLS INTO ITS JOINT. This is an actual thing that happens to her, ladies and gentlemen, because of a repaired birth defect that means that her feet are actually a little bit smaller than they should be, but the tendons grew to be the correct size. Kinda weird, I know.
SO OUR HERO SITS BY THE SIDE OF THE ROAD UNTIL HER LEG AND HER FOOT FEEL BETTER.
Ladies and gentlemen! Epic!
Other things:
1) Target is using her first name (Kelsey) in its advertisements as a Generic Name For A Graduate. That means that her name is TOO COMMON NOW. From now on, one must call her BERWICK. THE CAPS LOCK IS REQUIRED. WAIT NO IT'S NOT.
2) Very sad:
We probably won't hear from the Mars Rover Spirit again.3) I forget how much I love Faramir and Eowyn. I haven't looked at them in years.
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