(no subject)
so Kara got me thinking. she was saying how shes jealous of everyone having a significant other and how she wished she found someone to love unconditionally and i totally agree with her. its tough seeing a lot of people in school and around in general with their boyfriend or girlfriend and then me not having anyone. it's like, as much as i try to find someone out there, i just find no interest. either that, or the guy isnt interested. but thats besides the point. i just want to find someone out there ya know. i know theres someone out there waiting for me but idk i just want to find them now. i mean some people find guys right and left. they date them and then they break up and then not very long after, they find someone else. theyre lucky. i look around in school and i see people who i never expected to have a girlfriend or boyfriend and im like wow how did they find someone and not me? idk i just feel left out thats all. im the 3rd wheel now. my best friend has a boyfriend and im the 3rd wheel. im the only girl in the group pretty much that doesnt have someone. it sucks. i like someone but he doesnt have time. its just another excuse to me. jon makes time for becky.. A LOT of time, even if she doesnt realize it (which i dont know if she does or not...just saying) and hes going through the same things as drew but he just cant make up his mind. i tell myself that im not gonna care anymore but it just makes me think when i see jon and becky together it makes me feel sad. dont get me wrong, im happy for them...seriously i am, but its not fair because ive been so patient and he just doesnt make his mind up and it hurts to realize that im not worth his time and that i wasnt given the chance to show him. you learn from your mistakes right? well if something did happen between me and him and it didnt work out, at least we would know but instead i have think "what if."