"It'll be ok, I'll be ok, He'll be ok, We'll be ok, It'll be ok,I'll be ok,He'll be ok, We'll be ok"
of course i have only been updating this when im really upset, and this time should come of no surprise... i'm real upset again. I have people to talk to this time, thats not a problem. The problem is my confusion. i feel i have no sense of logic left in me. im trying to figure out just what to do but i feel like the answer is that key in the pile of syringes in saw 2. Theres a lot of pointy shit i gutta go through before i find it. will i find it in time to open the door and get the antidote, or will i meet another dead end? well not that extreme, i guess, but i like metaphors. i like gettin really carried away with them. i like finding logic in other situations and applying them to my own. logic, ha theres something i feel is a blurry gray area to me. i got an A in AP Calculus! i found that out yesterday. but i can't figure out my own problems. math is so logical... theres rules and limits and thats that. break a rule and your answer is undefined. break a limit and the answer does not exist. why can't life be that simple? theres a domain and range for every function, the domain is what can go in and the range is what comes out. i always found that the domian is always the easiest to find. but now i dont know what to put in my equation of life. i don't know what to do to make things turn out the way i want, to make my range equal happiness.
time... time... time heels everything. what if theres nothing to be heeled? what if i need something changed? i hope time changes things too. but just a little bit. i need to change, you need to change. the function will never change but our domain can... what we put in our function (lets label it function "relationship", f(r)) has to change than what we've put in in the past. in math, you can restrict the domain (the stuff you put in) in order to get a range (thats what comes out, i hope everyone's following) that you desire. so lets put the following restriction on our domain:
(remember r is what we put in the function)
If,
r can not = lying,
r can not = cheating, and
r must = [compassion, affection], [trust, respect]
Then f(r)= happiness.
i will call this theorm 0903 (september 3rd, oh im so clever!)
wow i definatly intended to write something different than this, but i'll setlle for this right now. i will update soon because im still extremely sad and i chose this journal over celexa. again, sorry for any confusion, like i said... i like metaphors. i like math too.
bye bye,
-chrystal
oh, i forgot to state in my new therom that the limit equals "i will always love you no matter what"
time... time... time heels everything. what if theres nothing to be heeled? what if i need something changed? i hope time changes things too. but just a little bit. i need to change, you need to change. the function will never change but our domain can... what we put in our function (lets label it function "relationship", f(r)) has to change than what we've put in in the past. in math, you can restrict the domain (the stuff you put in) in order to get a range (thats what comes out, i hope everyone's following) that you desire. so lets put the following restriction on our domain:
(remember r is what we put in the function)
If,
r can not = lying,
r can not = cheating, and
r must = [compassion, affection], [trust, respect]
Then f(r)= happiness.
i will call this theorm 0903 (september 3rd, oh im so clever!)
wow i definatly intended to write something different than this, but i'll setlle for this right now. i will update soon because im still extremely sad and i chose this journal over celexa. again, sorry for any confusion, like i said... i like metaphors. i like math too.
bye bye,
-chrystal
oh, i forgot to state in my new therom that the limit equals "i will always love you no matter what"