Rehabilitation Centers Medications & Beyond
Sigh... Where Do I begin?
I guess this is more a note to self than to any one at all. First and foremost I am a recovering Alcoholic (7 Years Sober Now) and I seem to think of things a bit differently now than I did when I was trying to come clean rather than I was first going through the first stages of my Treatment program for my mental illness. I was on a manic the other night. This after being on a horrible depression that lasted a total of 3 days of a dark, feel sorry for myself blah, blah, blah.
During which I managed to blow $100 that I didn't have on just anything that I needed at that time which didnt amount to anything at all. If you are even remotely Depressed, Bi-Polar, suffer from Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Schizoeffective Disorder and the lot then you will understand what I mean when I talk about the days of staying up for 24-36-48 hours trying to get things out of your head that you think are there but the truth of it is... they are not really there... to the lay person that is. It is debilitating sometimes but can leave you at different ones with such a wonderful feeling of "I Can Get Everything Done!" syndrome that is totally impossible to do, so then we are depressed once again.
So, we seek out the help of Specialists... Analysts, Psychiatrists, all the sort that are suppose to have all the answers but when you go into see them all they say is here, I got this new lot of samples that one of my drug companies says is suppose to be the latest, greatest thing since the invention of the Microwave.
This isn't fair to us. People in recovery do not need to be treated like laboratory rats just to see if there is a reaction to what was given to the specialist for their "Medical Trial", all we actually need is to be understood... to be looked at first in the face as another person that a nurse has to look as not just another file that is lost in the caseload of an overloaded staff in any public or private treatment center across the nation.
Private hospitals are a joke, all they want is your money and if you run out then you are cured. Then there are the public ones. The only difference between them and the first is that if they feel truthfully that you may be a harm to you or someone else, they will take the time to go over your files to ensure your safety. I have been to more public and private centers than
I can count on all of my fingers and it seems that all you learn from them is sit in the class, go and smoke, breakfast, sit in the class, go and smoke, eat lunch, go and smoke, sit in the class, have a bit of quiet time, take your meds and then bed by 10:00 each evening except on weekends when they would let you stay up till 12:00.
Tell me if I am wrong but doesn't it seem that they are trying to stick a pill down your throat every chance they get or if you do not comply they will give to you in suppository form? Not to mention if you are a "Bad Boy or Girl" they give you an Adavan Cocktail, stick you in the padded room till you are ready to place all nicety again. The lucky ones get the chance to be in a coed dorm. Sorry Kiddies, if you do not have money, you go into segregated wings in State Hospital. Isn't life just swell?
Of course, if you as are many that have been in many different places, you have learned to work the system and can work the body language and facial tones of the psychiatrists to beat the system. By beating the system it may be only for the purpose of getting back to an addiction that they are not ready to give up or simply because that they cannot can stand the thought of being locked up in a treatment facility.
I guess the real reason for starting this is that I am getting lots of psychobable bullshit. Everyone has a theory and the only persons that are getting truly help are the drug companies and the Doctors that are in on the experiments. It seems funny that every day that they come up with a new medication that is suppose to be more helpful than the last when all the time all they are doing is finding medications to fix the side effects from the medications that they have already manufactured.
Please tell me if I am "Mind Fucking" this a bit too much but I think I may have a point here, then again, maybe I am blowing smoke up even my own ass.
SIKOLTO
I guess this is more a note to self than to any one at all. First and foremost I am a recovering Alcoholic (7 Years Sober Now) and I seem to think of things a bit differently now than I did when I was trying to come clean rather than I was first going through the first stages of my Treatment program for my mental illness. I was on a manic the other night. This after being on a horrible depression that lasted a total of 3 days of a dark, feel sorry for myself blah, blah, blah.
During which I managed to blow $100 that I didn't have on just anything that I needed at that time which didnt amount to anything at all. If you are even remotely Depressed, Bi-Polar, suffer from Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Schizoeffective Disorder and the lot then you will understand what I mean when I talk about the days of staying up for 24-36-48 hours trying to get things out of your head that you think are there but the truth of it is... they are not really there... to the lay person that is. It is debilitating sometimes but can leave you at different ones with such a wonderful feeling of "I Can Get Everything Done!" syndrome that is totally impossible to do, so then we are depressed once again.
So, we seek out the help of Specialists... Analysts, Psychiatrists, all the sort that are suppose to have all the answers but when you go into see them all they say is here, I got this new lot of samples that one of my drug companies says is suppose to be the latest, greatest thing since the invention of the Microwave.
This isn't fair to us. People in recovery do not need to be treated like laboratory rats just to see if there is a reaction to what was given to the specialist for their "Medical Trial", all we actually need is to be understood... to be looked at first in the face as another person that a nurse has to look as not just another file that is lost in the caseload of an overloaded staff in any public or private treatment center across the nation.
Private hospitals are a joke, all they want is your money and if you run out then you are cured. Then there are the public ones. The only difference between them and the first is that if they feel truthfully that you may be a harm to you or someone else, they will take the time to go over your files to ensure your safety. I have been to more public and private centers than
I can count on all of my fingers and it seems that all you learn from them is sit in the class, go and smoke, breakfast, sit in the class, go and smoke, eat lunch, go and smoke, sit in the class, have a bit of quiet time, take your meds and then bed by 10:00 each evening except on weekends when they would let you stay up till 12:00.
Tell me if I am wrong but doesn't it seem that they are trying to stick a pill down your throat every chance they get or if you do not comply they will give to you in suppository form? Not to mention if you are a "Bad Boy or Girl" they give you an Adavan Cocktail, stick you in the padded room till you are ready to place all nicety again. The lucky ones get the chance to be in a coed dorm. Sorry Kiddies, if you do not have money, you go into segregated wings in State Hospital. Isn't life just swell?
Of course, if you as are many that have been in many different places, you have learned to work the system and can work the body language and facial tones of the psychiatrists to beat the system. By beating the system it may be only for the purpose of getting back to an addiction that they are not ready to give up or simply because that they cannot can stand the thought of being locked up in a treatment facility.
I guess the real reason for starting this is that I am getting lots of psychobable bullshit. Everyone has a theory and the only persons that are getting truly help are the drug companies and the Doctors that are in on the experiments. It seems funny that every day that they come up with a new medication that is suppose to be more helpful than the last when all the time all they are doing is finding medications to fix the side effects from the medications that they have already manufactured.
Please tell me if I am "Mind Fucking" this a bit too much but I think I may have a point here, then again, maybe I am blowing smoke up even my own ass.
SIKOLTO