time to get things off my chest...
i get home from work tonight, and one of the first things my grandma says to me is something about how we don't have most of the channels anymore.
totally perplexed i asked "what?" and she rambled something that confused me even more. so i ignored her and asked my aunt what she meant.
my aunt tells me that she got home from work, and my grandma tells her that she decided to cancel the cable because "she doesn't use it."
what???
i cannot figure out my grandma anymore. she is the one person who i thought had the biggest heart in the world... and lately she has been throwing me curve balls left and right.
now the issue here isn't just that she cancelled the cabled and that we're only left with the boring channels. (although my aunt and i are pretty annoyed by that... but my aunt called and she's getting it back on thursday) but what's driving me crazy is that my grandma wouldn't say anything before hand, and supposedly said that it's because "she doesn't need it." i dont understand when she became so selfish.
AND it's not just the cable.
i haven't really told many people yet... but basically my grandma has informed some of us that she is selling the house.
she isn't even "thinking" about it. it IS going to happen.
my aunt and uncle (the ones that are pregnant) are moving from salt lake city down to carlsbad (near san diego) in a couple of weeks. and they told me grandma that she could move in with them and they would take care of her. ummmmmm.....
this whole fucking situation is SO annoying! I was supposed to move down there (just part time) and help take care of my baby cousin when he's born this summer. I wanted to do it! and now they've invited my grandma to live with them! and now my grandma has made up her mind to sell this house and help them buy a house down in carlsbad by the time the year is over.
i dont want to sound selfish... i'm happy my grandma will be happy... only i'm SO incredibly annoyed by all of this! WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO!?! i do not plan on moving down there with them.... not if my grandma is moving in too. i would be useless... i wouldn't be able to take care of my cousin if she's there.
my aunt is also annoyed... most of us are... but basically my aunt and i are left needing to find a place to move. maybe this is good... this way maybe i can get a place of my own now. i want a place of my own so bad. i miss what i had in italy. but shit....
and what also hurts is knowing that this house won't be in the family anymore. this house is SO important to me! this house is where i spent my last 3 1/2 months with my mom. i took care of her. we cried together. i gave her her meds and so so so much more. it's ridiculous. this is the house she died in! fuck! i don't want some strange family moving in here! it makes me cry just thinking about it. this is our house! this is where we sat and watched ellen and dr.phil on the couch together in the afternoons. this is the backyard were i would take her out in her wheelchair to sit in the sun and get some fresh air and help her work on her walking sticks she loved so much. leaving this house is going to crush what little i have remaining of my heart.
i think one of the most annoying things is that my grandma didn't even ask our opinions about this all. she just told us this is what's happening. and she said it like it's no big deal. like it won't even effect us at all. WRONG.
totally perplexed i asked "what?" and she rambled something that confused me even more. so i ignored her and asked my aunt what she meant.
my aunt tells me that she got home from work, and my grandma tells her that she decided to cancel the cable because "she doesn't use it."
what???
i cannot figure out my grandma anymore. she is the one person who i thought had the biggest heart in the world... and lately she has been throwing me curve balls left and right.
now the issue here isn't just that she cancelled the cabled and that we're only left with the boring channels. (although my aunt and i are pretty annoyed by that... but my aunt called and she's getting it back on thursday) but what's driving me crazy is that my grandma wouldn't say anything before hand, and supposedly said that it's because "she doesn't need it." i dont understand when she became so selfish.
AND it's not just the cable.
i haven't really told many people yet... but basically my grandma has informed some of us that she is selling the house.
she isn't even "thinking" about it. it IS going to happen.
my aunt and uncle (the ones that are pregnant) are moving from salt lake city down to carlsbad (near san diego) in a couple of weeks. and they told me grandma that she could move in with them and they would take care of her. ummmmmm.....
this whole fucking situation is SO annoying! I was supposed to move down there (just part time) and help take care of my baby cousin when he's born this summer. I wanted to do it! and now they've invited my grandma to live with them! and now my grandma has made up her mind to sell this house and help them buy a house down in carlsbad by the time the year is over.
i dont want to sound selfish... i'm happy my grandma will be happy... only i'm SO incredibly annoyed by all of this! WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO!?! i do not plan on moving down there with them.... not if my grandma is moving in too. i would be useless... i wouldn't be able to take care of my cousin if she's there.
my aunt is also annoyed... most of us are... but basically my aunt and i are left needing to find a place to move. maybe this is good... this way maybe i can get a place of my own now. i want a place of my own so bad. i miss what i had in italy. but shit....
and what also hurts is knowing that this house won't be in the family anymore. this house is SO important to me! this house is where i spent my last 3 1/2 months with my mom. i took care of her. we cried together. i gave her her meds and so so so much more. it's ridiculous. this is the house she died in! fuck! i don't want some strange family moving in here! it makes me cry just thinking about it. this is our house! this is where we sat and watched ellen and dr.phil on the couch together in the afternoons. this is the backyard were i would take her out in her wheelchair to sit in the sun and get some fresh air and help her work on her walking sticks she loved so much. leaving this house is going to crush what little i have remaining of my heart.
i think one of the most annoying things is that my grandma didn't even ask our opinions about this all. she just told us this is what's happening. and she said it like it's no big deal. like it won't even effect us at all. WRONG.