black?
[29 Nov 2007 | Thursday] reposted from myspace [why do i have 2 blogs?]
Most of the time people assume I'm black. But I've noticed that if people are oriented in POC groups with other backgrounds, they may assume I'm from the group they're more familiar with [ranging from Puerto Rican to Indian].
I enjoy this.
why? I dunno. I like to see people try to figure out what I am. And I like to not tell them. maybe cuz I pretty much grew up with the 'colorblind' thing, that was all the rage with progressives in the '80s.
sure, the concept is a lie and it doesn't really work - don't think/talk about or "notice" race, and it won't be there. or at least, it won't matter. even now, if someone asks me to describe someone, [sometimes] i'll try doing it without mentioning their race. i always wonder if they'll assume that the person is white if i don't mention the race. or if they'll assume they're black because I appear black.
i think about race all the time. especially when i see patterns or discrepancies.
every once in a while, when i was little, we might be going somewhere, and daddy would be driving and mom'd be in the back seat. [you know, maybe one of us wanted to ride in the front, or we wanted mom to ride with us - whatever] as soon as i was old enough to know that there were such things as chauffeurs i would wonder if people that saw us might think that daddy was mom's driver. especially during those times that we had mercedes'.
yeah - i was conscious of status/money when i was little, too. it was much more vague than color, though. mostly, i thought we were poor, cuz i couldn't have the things that i wanted - like sugar cereals, and popular toys/branded merchandise. i knew we weren't destitute...but...i couldn't figure why we couldn't ever get the cereal that i saw advertised on tv. [the only sugar cereal we ever had was honeycomb, otherwise it was corn flakes and chex. until i went away to school, and i tasted captain crunch for the first time. of course, when i came back home, it was back to chex.]
so the question of the year is - who's gonna get the nomination? the black guy or the woman? sub-part a: is the black guy really black? sub-part b: is the woman really a liberal?
well..my answer to both subparts is - i dunno. does Obama qualify as black? it's quite close to asking if *I* qualify as black. close, but not the same. cuz the question is referring to his heritage - and lack of American blackness. the Black American experience is never just *one* generation's worth. Black immigrants can get the one-generation version, and get the false impression that things are all better now. Then they can teach it to their kids, having dealt with [presumably] less obstacles, than those with longer histories here.
This is why transplanted black islanders don't get the American black experience either.
sure, when it all comes down, we all look black - and if a crime has been committed, no one's going to say hey - are your parents from here or are they immigrants? they're just gonna call you a suspect. but on the positive side, when benefits are being doled out, it seems that those questions do get asked and answered - in subtext.
it's a wild and crazy world we're living in, and the nuances of being black or mixed/biracial are still as sticky as ever.
but i can't continue. i hafta sleep.
peace.
----------------
Now playing: Emmylou Harris, Alison Krauss & Gillian Welch - Didn't Leave Nobody But The Baby
via FoxyTunes
Most of the time people assume I'm black. But I've noticed that if people are oriented in POC groups with other backgrounds, they may assume I'm from the group they're more familiar with [ranging from Puerto Rican to Indian].
I enjoy this.
why? I dunno. I like to see people try to figure out what I am. And I like to not tell them. maybe cuz I pretty much grew up with the 'colorblind' thing, that was all the rage with progressives in the '80s.
sure, the concept is a lie and it doesn't really work - don't think/talk about or "notice" race, and it won't be there. or at least, it won't matter. even now, if someone asks me to describe someone, [sometimes] i'll try doing it without mentioning their race. i always wonder if they'll assume that the person is white if i don't mention the race. or if they'll assume they're black because I appear black.
i think about race all the time. especially when i see patterns or discrepancies.
every once in a while, when i was little, we might be going somewhere, and daddy would be driving and mom'd be in the back seat. [you know, maybe one of us wanted to ride in the front, or we wanted mom to ride with us - whatever] as soon as i was old enough to know that there were such things as chauffeurs i would wonder if people that saw us might think that daddy was mom's driver. especially during those times that we had mercedes'.
yeah - i was conscious of status/money when i was little, too. it was much more vague than color, though. mostly, i thought we were poor, cuz i couldn't have the things that i wanted - like sugar cereals, and popular toys/branded merchandise. i knew we weren't destitute...but...i couldn't figure why we couldn't ever get the cereal that i saw advertised on tv. [the only sugar cereal we ever had was honeycomb, otherwise it was corn flakes and chex. until i went away to school, and i tasted captain crunch for the first time. of course, when i came back home, it was back to chex.]
so the question of the year is - who's gonna get the nomination? the black guy or the woman? sub-part a: is the black guy really black? sub-part b: is the woman really a liberal?
well..my answer to both subparts is - i dunno. does Obama qualify as black? it's quite close to asking if *I* qualify as black. close, but not the same. cuz the question is referring to his heritage - and lack of American blackness. the Black American experience is never just *one* generation's worth. Black immigrants can get the one-generation version, and get the false impression that things are all better now. Then they can teach it to their kids, having dealt with [presumably] less obstacles, than those with longer histories here.
This is why transplanted black islanders don't get the American black experience either.
sure, when it all comes down, we all look black - and if a crime has been committed, no one's going to say hey - are your parents from here or are they immigrants? they're just gonna call you a suspect. but on the positive side, when benefits are being doled out, it seems that those questions do get asked and answered - in subtext.
it's a wild and crazy world we're living in, and the nuances of being black or mixed/biracial are still as sticky as ever.
but i can't continue. i hafta sleep.
peace.
----------------
Now playing: Emmylou Harris, Alison Krauss & Gillian Welch - Didn't Leave Nobody But The Baby
via FoxyTunes