My epiphany explained~
OK- this may take a while. But because I was up early and helped with the Jogakuin Open Campus for most of the day, I'm tired and will make this short...
Recently I've been doing a lot of thinking about a lot of different things; but the one thing i've been thinking the most about is my future. I have been jumping around and considering a lot of options over the past few months (for example: why not go to other countries to teach english too? Like Hong Kong, Taiwan, Korea...), and then there were the options of becoming a japanese language teacher here in the US. But I just didn't know... nothing really fit in and stuck with me. With every option that I thought about, I was always left with this uneasy, unsure feeling.
Well, over the past few weeks I've been looking at a bunch of dating sites (in Japan or Asia in general. dont judge me), and I realized that there are SOO many gay people in these countries! But when you look at their cultures and countries (even when you LIVE in them), they are invisible and never talked about. Like, with my last girlfriend, she could never tell anyone because if anyone found out or knew, she could lose her job. Thats the same with a lot of these people... they live these secret lives and most end up getting married because its whats expected from them. These people, unless you really know them and know the right places to see them, are invisible in the most literal of senses. It made me a little sad..
Then I went back to thinking about what I want to do... like "I still want to use Japanese in my career, I dont want to work for a company or in a cubicle, I want to teach, I want to actually educate people and have an actually affect and help change things for the better.... *DING* OMG!!" That's when it hit me; I want to get my Master's degree in East Asian Studies with a focus on Japan/Women's History, then get my doctorate specializing in Homosexuality in Asia in a both historical and current events sense. I want to be a professor!
I visited the websites to the 4 largest university's in America, and not ONE of them offers ANYTHING concerning homosexuality in Asia. What did I find? I found language, literature, and business classes. There is more to these countries than what we see on the surface, and I want to help people understand that! I want to make these people more visible and want to help bring a greater sense of understanding of their underground culture. There is no one doing this... and I want to be the first :)
The amount of school this will require will be rediculous... but thats okay. :) I feel really good about this. I was explaining this idea to my friend Hiromi last night and she told me "Megan, I've never seen you so happy and excited about something before!".
On that note... Happy Father's Day, Dad!! haha, promise you and mom still love me even though I'm now pursuing a really gay career? Love you...
XOXO