All I wanna do is Talk Talk Talk To You <3
So life definitely is full of surprises. So many things have happened this month. My biology teacher from BCC passed away, my car got egged by the snot nosed brats next door, my aunt's step dad died, and I have issues with other people(or a person?) in my life. But it's true..all good things must come to an end. I just never thought this would happen. I think I'm starting to come to terms with things, but I'm still confused about how someone I really trusted could treat me like this? I think that part has really hurt me. I guess everyone I talked to was right...the whole situation isn't worth the time or the tears I've shed. I don't think things will ever be the same after this.
On another note, I think I'm really in love with someone again. It has been a while, but I've finally fallen for my pen pal. It just sucks cuz it's like high school all over again. I fall so hardcore for people but they never return the feelings. I'm pretty sure he doesn't share the same feelings and I'm terrified to confess but I'm just as equally terrified that he will be taken from me .____. It's quite a conundrum. But I bet if I confess, things will never be the same with our relationship. But when I was journaling about my feelings for him last night, I actually started crying. It has been a while since I've been that moved by my feelings for a guy. I guess I'm in the pathetic, sappy feelings stage! But I do think about him all the time. I hope one day we can meet. And I think I'm really going to print all of his e-mails and put them into a cute scrap book^^ It would mean a lot to me. I don't know if he's the one for me, but I definitely have feelings for him! It doesn't help that I had two dreams in a row about him being my boyfriend (and I actually got to meet his mom~ she didn't approve of us since she was super traditional~ haha) I dunno, I just feel like I'm sooo not his type that he could never like me as I am. I've been feeling really down about my body image, it actually cheered me up some when all these old women told me I was a beautiful girl today at my aunt's step dad's funeral^^ I needed to hear that! (now I'm getting teary eyed .___.) I should go! Oyasumi!!! ^___~