heavenly stabbed
The pain has yet to subside. This hurts so much. I never would have thought I would be this upset so early. You told me you loved me. Right now I can’t imagine a day where I am not crying over you. My heart doesn’t feel broken that’s the thing. It feels like its been stabbed. And part of me thinks that’s worse. Everything reminds me of you and we don’t even see each other daily. Which I suppose will help me get over you. I let myself get hurt. I let you walk all over my heart and this is now the price I must pay. I don’t want to lose you but I am afraid of holding on to you. I’m afraid all I will be doing is crying because that is all I want to do. The fact of whether or not I actually loved you i am pretty sure is unture, which to me is good. But still every minute I now think of what I could have done different. How I could have changed things. I'm not that strong of a person though. Now I wonder did my friends really push you away and think you weren't good enough for me because the truth is I am not good enough for you. Obviously I could not live up to par. Now the question of how soon can i go numb to the world? How soon till I can block this feeling out? When can I escape this pain?