Comments | shortfuseburnig: Life's A Beach.

shortfuseburnig

Life's A Beach.

Dec 11, 2008 16:01

A cold pressure sweeps over her cheeks ( Read more... )

Comments 15

troutsavedmylyf December 13 2008, 01:01:13 UTC

First, i just have to say that the period in your title irks me. A title doesn't need a period. In my opinion. It just seems...pointless. Point-less. Could that have been a pun? Maybe.

But, beyond that I thought it was interesting. You do some nice things with the sounds of the words in there. The sort of subtle compliments of sound that you can't really try to do, it just happens or it doesn't. And it does, so that's always nice.

I'm not a fan of the periods/extended ellipses at the end. I think I like it better if they were just spaces. Maybe. Maybe ellipses at the ends of the lines. Or dashes. I'm nit-picking. Sorry.

Gotta love the beach this time of year. It's so barren, yet so full of life. :)

anonymous March 22 2009, 20:55:40 UTC

this is fucking terrible. I really dont like this. At all. STOP.

shortfuseburnig March 22 2009, 21:19:02 UTC

go fuck yourself, thanks.

shortfuseburnig March 22 2009, 21:20:12 UTC

... whether it's tyler or corey.

ihatetylerbaird March 23 2009, 00:39:19 UTC

...That wasn't me. I don't care enough.

shortfuseburnig March 23 2009, 05:16:13 UTC

yeah that makes sense. since when are you guys even on livejournal and checking my page anyway? such a strange coincedence! as for the writing comment below, it's really not that bad. it's a draft, and i can put it up here no matter how rough it is. nobody's asking you to poke around my page and leave hurtful comments, so sorry for not taking the fake apology. i'd appreciate it if you'd just leave me alone from now on.

ihatetylerbaird March 23 2009, 06:08:42 UTC

My bad it was supposed to be constructive criticism.

starxsatellite March 23 2009, 13:18:40 UTC

I was poking around livejournal and saw that you accused them and that's why they went to your page and left comments. Not too strange.

Thread 8

anonymous March 23 2009, 00:43:09 UTC

This is going to hurt but I think you should practice more before you put your writing on the internet. Unless you don't mind being a joke. I'm sorry for how brutal it is to say that.

wakinginadream March 23 2009, 01:09:34 UTC

yyyyeaahhh not me either but since we're on the subject, I dont like it no.

shortfuseburnig March 23 2009, 05:35:47 UTC

holy crap what a surprise