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POST #1
Please read the rules if you're a first-time visitor, and request/fill away, Personanons! ♥
NEW: Updates will now be posted nightly-ish to the shirakawa_hotel comm, so feel free to track it or watch the comm. A fills list will be coming soon!
Please read the rules if you're a first-time visitor, and request/fill away, Personanons! ♥
NEW: Updates will now be posted nightly-ish to the shirakawa_hotel comm, so feel free to track it or watch the comm. A fills list will be coming soon!
I hope anon likes regardless!
"Hey, mister, are you okay?"
There's nothing wrong with little kids asking harmless little questions, but the voice that snaps Jin out of his thoughts makes him go tense anyway - he's been constantly on edge for over a month now, seeing Shadows around every corner, and today a shitty mood only makes things worse. He blinks at the boy standing in front of him and finally manages a shrug. "Could be better."
"Did you have a fight with your girlfriend?" The kid can't be older than six or seven, all wide-eyed innocence and scraped knees... but he's awfully perceptive for a little brat. If nothing else he's a distraction, and Jin could use one of those.
"Something like that," he admits.
Before his mind can get the better of his mouth and throw out superfluous details - 'cept he's not a girl, and right now I'm not sure he's much of a friend, either - a woman swoops down to snatch her son away, glowering at Jin as she passes, and the momentary distraction only leaves him feeling worse.
Maybe he didn't have a fight with his girlfriend, but fights with Takaya aren't exactly better, and this one was made all the worse by being the second this week. They've been arguing a lot more since SEES took Chidori. They've had a lot more to argue about; the respective merits of action and caution, whether they should or shouldn't fight without their healer and their scout... somehow it's hard to talk about these things without it escalating to swearing and yelling (at least on Jin's part) and demands that Jin leave until he can keep a civil tongue in his head (on Takaya's).
That was hours ago, and Jin's been hanging around Paulownia Mall ever since - not because he hasn't cooled off enough to control his temper, but because he doesn't want to face Takaya's. Takaya can be downright frightening when he's mad, and Jin's known him for so long that he doesn't need Chidori's abilities to tell when Hypnos' power and rage are humming just under the surface. (That's been happening a lot lately too, and Jin's never been more aware that Takaya doesn't need an Evoker to raise hell.)
But Jin's not quite sure where the line is between not being gone long enough and being gone too long, and it's one he doesn't want to cross. With a sigh he hauls himself to his feet and heads back towards the apartment Strega calls home, resigned to whatever might await him when he gets there.
Takaya's on the living room couch, staring at the blank TV screen, when Jin unlocks the door and steps inside. He lifts his head when Jin flips on the lights but doesn't otherwise react, and Jin stands just inside the door for a long moment, not quite sure what to do. Chidori's absence has thrown all his calculations off - he doesn't know, anymore, just how Takaya will react to anything.
"I'm sorry," he finally says, awkwardly, setting down his case and moving to sit on the arm of the couch. Takaya doesn't protest - doesn't do much of anything else, either, but it's a start. "That I doubted you. I should know better, I shouldn't question -"
"You shouldn't," Takaya interrupts, "but it is understandable. Losing Chidori has affected us both."
He stands, briefly patting Jin on the head, and Jin's too thankful to care how condescending the gesture is. If it means everything's okay he'll put up with anything. "You didn't need to worry me so much," he grumbles, but he can't hide a grin. "You were really pissed, y'know. You've hit Chidori for less."
"I would never do the same to you, Jin." Takaya sighs and stretches, arching his back with a crack that makes Jin cringe. "When Chidori loses herself, only pain will bring her to her senses. You have never been quite so... difficult.
"But," he continues, and something in his tone makes Jin wary, "if we are to succeed, I cannot have you questioning me. I would never beat you, but neither will I allow you to forget that. Undress for me, Jin."
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And with that he vanishes into the bedroom, leaving Jin drained of all relief he felt. It's really been a while since Takaya had reason to so much as scold him, let alone punish him, and he thinks he'd probably like it better if Takaya would just go ahead and hit him. Fighting is something he knows, whether it's with Shadows or stubborn targets or his own partners - but Takaya's brand of punishment is always different. (Which he knows is the point, but that doesn't make him dislike it any less.)
The living room seems cold, suddenly, and he shivers as he pulls off his clothes, leaving them in a messy pile on the couch. Goosebumps rise on his arms and refuse to be rubbed away, and he feels like dirt as he stands and waits - so miserable and pissed off at himself that this alone feels like punishment. Too bad that won't be enough for Takaya.
Takaya comes back with a small box he sets on the couch, and the first thing he does is take off Jin's glasses and set them aside. That just makes things even worse - they both know that Jin hates the way the word goes fuzzy and indistinct without his glasses. It's way too easy to be snuck up on when he can't see a damn thing, and he doesn't think any Shadows are going to be ambushing him in his own living room but that doesn't make him any more comfortable. He struggles to focus on Takaya, who's still standing in front of him.
"I'm not angry with you." Takaya touches his cheek, tipping his head up so their eyes meet. Somehow that bright gold manages to cut through the fuzziness. Jin doesn't look away, clinging to what he can see. "You understand that, do you not?"
"Yeah." The silence that stretches out after Jin speaks needs to be broken, and he swallows hard and scrambles to think. "You hate when I get stubborn with you, and you want to make sure I remember that. Doesn't mean you hate me."
"Good." Takaya's hand closes around his and pulls, not to comfort him but to lead him to the couch. Takaya sits, and his hands move to Jin's waist to guide him into kneeling, his knees on either side of Takaya's legs. Jin bows his head and squints at the rips in Takaya's jeans, uncomfortable and uncertain. "This isn't punishment, Jin. Merely... a reminder."
A reminder of what, exactly, Takaya doesn't specify, but Jin can guess. Anyone else would have to force him into this, and probably wouldn't be able to do so without getting a broken nose for their trouble; Takaya's power over him is so great that he can command him with just words, and he's earned it. Maybe that's the point of this little exercise - to remind him that he trusts Takaya's judgment, even when it goes against his own.
Even when it leads him against Shadows without a Spring of Life waiting to heal his wounds.
He rests his head on Takaya's shoulder and waits. And remembers.
There's not enough trust in the world to keep him from flinching when Takaya strokes up the back of his thigh, not when he's this keyed up - so keyed up that his legs tremble, and he rests his arms on the back of the couch, tries to keep steady - but at least he manages to stay put instead of bolting across the room. Apparently that's enough for Takaya, who doesn't complain one way or the other.
For a while they're both quiet, or at least Takaya is; Jin's sure his heart is beating loud enough to be audible in the silence, the way it's practically beating out of his chest. The touch against his leg stays steady, consistent, and it almost falls into soothing by the time it abruptly stops. The sudden sound of a cap flipping open rings like a gunshot and Jin flinches again.
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The slick fingers fall still for almost long enough for Jin to adjust, but then they push deep in one long thrust that makes him suck in a breath at the feeling. It's been so long - the suppressants rob him of the desire for sex if not the ability, and Takaya probably never had the desire to begin with, and nobody else is worth his time - and it's just shy of familiar, and as Takaya slides his fingers out and pushes them still deeper he presses the back of his hand to his mouth to keep quiet. His other hand clutches the back of the couch, fingers digging in hard to the worn and stained upholstery.
Takaya's having too much fun with this.
He takes his time, too, and Jin's faintly aware of a hand petting his hair, comforting him just enough to keep him quiet through the maddening rhythm of being finger-fucked into submission. A third finger makes him groan through his teeth into his hand, trying to relax but acutely aware of the stretch and fullness - and the heat in his belly, the ache in his dick (and there's no way Takaya doesn't notice that with Jin pressed right up against him, but he doesn't say anything, just keeps up his infuriatingly slow pace). So much for lacking desire.
When Takaya finally pulls his fingers out for good Jin's almost disappointed, until he realizes that while Takaya might be done for the moment he's certainly not letting him go anywhere. More to come, then, though Jin can't imagine what, not with Takaya still dressed -
The press of something against him, slick with lube and wider than the fingers that so recently left, answers his question. A hand pressing against his shoulder urges him back and down to take it, and he lowers himself on shaking legs to push back against the dildo.
It's definitely wider than anything he's had inside himself in recent memory, maybe ever, wide enough that there's something almost like pain as Jin pushes down to take the head of it inside - that makes him hesitate, but Takaya's still pressing down on his shoulder and the unspoken order is clear. Slowly but surely Jin lowers himself more, feeling every last inch and the agonizing, slow friction as his ass grips the dildo and refuses to let go.
Finally (after a handful of minutes, no more, but it feels like forever) the base and Takaya's hand hit his ass, and the hand on his shoulder tightens its grip, just a little, in something that could be possession or maybe approval. He sits back against Takaya's knees, pressing the dildo in a last bit further, and finally dares to open his eyes and catch his breath.
Takaya's eyes burn into his, catlike in the smug satisfaction there. "Very good," he purrs, and his hand moves from Jin's shoulder to his stomach to press against it as though he can feel the dildo through Jin's skin. (Maybe he can. Not like Jin ain't skinny enough, and the dildo feels impossibly huge inside him, stretching him so wide he feels like it'll split him apart.) Then that hand moves lower, cool fingers closing around Jin's dick and stroking once, twice -
Jin tips back his head and breathes out a "fuck!" as he comes, for the first time in weeks or maybe months, and he knows this is a reminder that'll be burned into his brain for the few months left of eternity.
***
Uh. There's a line in post 1 in tinyfont that should've been in italics; let's pretend I meant to do that. Sleep-deprived anon is sleep-deprived.
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Mod enjoyed your fill very much, write!anon :)
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