Blog
I keep thinking of all these things I need to blog about and a hugeass blog has been piling up at the back of my head. But now that I'm here to post it, it's just not coming out. Maybe if I just start typing, it'll come out. But I don't know... It's always like "Oh I want to blog this" but once I see the blog, I lose all interest. I need to have a portable blog or something. That would really help.
I need to form some sort of awareness of my eating habits because it's getting me in a lot of trouble without me noticing. I always eat a lot, or I think I do, and I can't tell when I'm hungry. Sometimes I just say I feel like eating, but maybe I actually am hungry when I say this. Today I probably didn't notice that I was hungry. I came home around 2 pm from college and ate a decent meal, though it was probably less than a meal. (Also I think coffee is really bad for me right now, but I keep forgetting that too.) Anyway, I left around 5 for rehearsal (and a library run which took much longer than I planned and made me late). The thing about the library run was that the location was less convenient than I'd thought. (I actually thought I had to go to the one on 7th ave and 53rd but then realized it was rather the one on 5th ave and 40th, which is a big difference, and now that I think about it, didn't the 7th ave branch close down for a while or something? What's wrong with me?) So anyway it was a bit chaotic getting to the Grand Central station from there. I should've just swallowed my laziness and taken the F train rather than chasing after the 6 which was all the way down wherever. I dislike Grand Central. Never did me any justice. Well, hello unfelt hunger? I got to rehearsal and almost fainted because everything just spun all of a sudden. And I was just like wtf I can't control this and I wasn't able to really focus and get myself back together for a while. I'm guessing I was hungry but didn't know it. I overestimate the amount that I eat, I guess. Also, I looked at myself in the mirror and I look like a stick. When did that happen? Yesterday, when I was going to class, rehearsal, or wherever it was I was going, I noticed that the width of my waistline has gotten really, really thin. I mean, I always kind of had a thin waist but it looks like there's literally nothing there right now. I was always rather thin from the sideview but more normal from the front, but it feels like it's reaching that same level of thickness. Not that I want to be fat but I've been having issues I think. I kind of took a pill in a panic not caring that everyone basically saw that I carry them around with me. I was just way too freaked out and trying to calm myself down and it was a really hard task. This lady behind me gave me some bread and I'm really thankful to her. It still took a while to get myself together even after eating it.
And I just totally lost my trail of thought cause someone IM'd me and I started ranting everything to him so it's not gonna be blogged because of that.
But anyway this lady I stood next to at the end when we sightread this thing in this sectional was like "OMG YOUR VOICE SO AMAZING D8" and I was like DDDD: UHH THANKS I can read music??? What can I say? ;-; And I've actually studied this stuff so I SHOULD sound good. ;-; lol it did feel good being told that I should be a music major (again).
Well umm yeah I'll write more later maybe.
Bye