Haetae [Part 2]
>Part 1<
Chapter 4
It was a freezing cold day, just like every other day for the past 5 weeks. Christmas had already come and gone and Jonghyun had taken to focusing on reaching his 100th day so that he could be granted a couple of day’s leave from the camp to see his family. Thankfully his first furlough would fall around the New Year holidays, because Jjong didn’t think he would have coped with the holiday otherwise.
Christmas on camp had been a surreal experience to say the least. In the morning parade had been replaced by hours of religious services in the chapel. Jjong had skipped them in favour of going to sit alone in the base’s library to write sad lyrics. That hadn’t happened though because he’d found Onew in there. They’d played monopoly instead, whilst Onew tried to tell him interesting facts about plant medicine that all sounded like they could have been jokes he just didn’t get. After that, at lunch, the section had all gathered in the cafeteria for party games and fake American food. Taemin had drawn Jjong’s name from the Secret Santa and gotten him a packet of instant ramen which, in an effort to be thoughtful, he’d tried to draw a dog on. The picture had just made Jonghyun cry because he missed his own dog but he appreciated the effort nonetheless.
So… on this cold, foggy afternoon in very late December, they were drilling on the parade ground. Jonghyun hated drilling. In his opinion it was both repetitive and pointless. Or the repetitiveness and the pointlessness was the point - instilling mindless discipline, and maybe being useful if someone important came to visit and they had to look smart. Captain Kibum, master of looking smart, was overseeing the drill.
“LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT….” shouted the sergeant major. Jjong still hated the sergeant major.
“ABOUT TURN! HALT!”
Jonghyun got the about turn bit right, but apparently not the halt. He spun out of control, slipping on the icy ground, fell into the superiorly coordinated Taemin next to him, and landed them both in a heap on the frozen dirt.
The officer loomed over them, looking very not-pleased.
“PRIVATE KIM JONGHYUN! WHAT WAS THAT? I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE SEEN SUCH A CLUMSY DISPLAY AND WORSE YOU HAVE ENDANGERED PRIVATE LEE!”
Jonghyun groaned, trying to disentangle himself from his fallen friend.
“DON’T EVEN TRY TO TALK BACK PRIVATE.” He hadn’t even tried, what the fuck? “IF YOU HAD GRITTED THE PARADE GROUND PROPERLY LAST NIGHT THEN THIS WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED, SO I AM HOLDING YOU SOLEY RESPONSIBLE… ACTUALLY, YOU WERE ALL SUPPOSED TO BE GRITTING THE PARADE GROUND LAST NIGHT... EVERYONE WE’RE GOING ON A RUN! SHIRTS OFF! MORNING CIRCUIT! [Captain if you could follow at the back to pick up stragglers] ON THE DOUBLE! GET MOVING!”
“YES SIR!”
WHAT? No shirts!? The sergeant major really was a tyrant, he thought as he stripped off his jacket and undershirt, leaving them on the ground with along with everyone else’s. Jonghyun thought that only people in the Special Forces units had to do this - like he’d seen on television. Everyone was going to be so annoyed with him when they got back. At least they were only running the morning route. It wasn’t very long, just up the hill into the woods, along, and down again. It only took about 20 minutes… but by then Jjong’s nipples might have frozen off…. and he needed them… for reasons.
*
As they got to the uphill section Jonghyun started to notice that something was wrong. It hadn’t mattered on the level ground, but now that they’d reached uneven terrain he could feel that the ankle that he’d spun on was dangerously numb and unstable, he wasn’t sure of where he was putting it and he was having to slow down to avoid rolling it on a lose sto-
“FUCkkk” Jonghyun tripped and tumbled over onto the rocky ground. That really fucking hurt.
“Jonghyun! You OK?” Some of his teammates rallied round to try and help him back up.
“Fuck no! Ahh-“
“What’s all this commotion?” Jonghyun heard the captain approaching.
“Sir! Private Jonghyun has fallen sir!”
“Again??” he questioned.
“Yes sir.”
“Well let’s look at him-“ Kibum’s face appeared above him, looking somehow amused, concerned and pissed off all at the same time. “Do you think you can walk on it?”
“Not really sir.” Jjong replied truthfully.
“Alright. Everyone, keep going, full speed, go report to the sergeant major and tell him what’s happened. I’ll get Private Kim to the hospital block.”
“Yes sir!”
And so Jjong was left, cold, shirtless, and alone with the captain, just the kind of thing he was dreading.
“You’re bleeding.”
“What? - I mean yes sir. Seems to be the case sir.” He looked down at his bare arms and they were indeed bleeding from a couple of scrapes and bad grazes. Kibum was looking at them too, checking him over for any more serious injuries. Jjong shivered, he knew that he was just looking but he could feel his skin prickling.
“You’ll get cold now you’ve stopped moving.”
Jonghyun bit back the impulse to say that of course he was already fucking cold, but then Kibum took off his own jacket and handed it to him. Jjong was touched - the captain didn’t have to do that.
As Kibum adjusted his undershirt Jjong tried not to focus on his collarbones and his gaze caught the captain’s dog-tags instead. “You’re younger than me.”
“What? Yes. Mind your own business private.” He said, flustered.
“Sorry sir…”
“I would have thought Minho had told you that anyway.”
“I…” Jonghyun was a little taken aback; he didn’t really expect the captain to ever mention his relationship with Minho in front of him. “He hasn’t really said anything about you… nothing specific I mean.”
“Hmmm? But you’ve asked.” It was more of a statement than a question, and Jonghyun suddenly felt embarrassed for trying to pry. “There’s no need to look so sorry. Everyone gossips you know.”
“Oh?”
“I’d be more insulted if I wasn’t talked about at least sometimes...”
What a funny thing for the captain to say, why was he being so… normal about this? Jonghyun wondered as the Captain hauled his newly clothed self off the ground.
“So you enjoy the attention?” he teased as Kibum struggled a little under his weight.
“Maybe - but if you tell anyone I said that I’ll drop you.”
“Well you’d have to be holding me at the time to do that~” Jjong said, totally reasonably. He wouldn’t be opposed to Kibum holding him under different circumstances. His hands were pleasingly large and he smelled a lot nicer than most soldiers. Although he was officially out of Jonghyun’s league in the army… out of the army Jjong wouldn’t have hesitated.
“Yah! Or I could drop you now and say it was an accident!”
“I’ll tell your boyfriend Minho then! He’ll believe me.”
Kibum dropped him. Jonghyun couldn’t say that he didn’t deserve it, even though it fucking hurt. Especially not when he saw the look in the captain’s eyes. He gulped; he’d taken it too far. Stupid.
Panic had crossed Kibum’s features. “What have you heard?” he hissed as he bent down to shake Jonghyun by the collar. “Who’s been saying that?”
“Shit it was a joke! No one said anything!” The captain was right up in his face and he did not look at all convinced. “I haven’t heard anything like that… And even if they had…” Jjong added more softly “I wouldn’t repeat it.” Kibum stopped shaking. He looked so vulnerable then, as if he were pleading with Jjong. And Jonghyun supposed that he was. A rumour like that could end his career. A rumour like that would mean disgrace for his family. Kibum had so much more to loose than he did. How could he have thought that flirting so casually with him was fair? Because flirting was what he’d been doing, there was no denying that.
Jonghyun was ready to grovel some more when a thumping noise announced a newcomer. Kibum sprang back. But it was only Minho, bouncing blithely into the scene, completely blind to the atmosphere between them.
“Good evening sir! Private.” He saluted, far too jovially for the atmosphere. “Can you not even lift his short-ass off the ground captain?”
“FOR FUCK’S SAKE MINHO COULD YOU FOR ONCE JUST NOT MAKE A FUCKING JOKE OUT OF MY CAREER!” Minho’s eyes bulged so wide that Jjong thought they’d fall out. “THIS MAY BE A NICE HOLIDAY FOR YOU, BUT THIS IS MY LIFE MINHO! IS IT THAT HARD TO JUST KEEP UP PRETENCE OF BEING PROFFESSIONAL IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE? FUCK YOU! I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE A FUCKING PROFFESSIONAL PRETENDER”
Poor Minho might as well have stepped on a landmine. “Kibum- Kibum! Calm down, this isn’t like you. What’s wrong?” Minho moved to hug the seething captain but got pushed back. “It’s only Jonghyun, he’s alright.”
Kibum looked close to tears.
“Nothing… Nothing’s happened Minho. I’m just stressed.”
“What did you do Jonghyun?” Minho asked sternly, rounding on him.
“I…” Jonghyun suddenly felt very on the spot.
“He did nothing, it’s not his fault. You’re right, he’s ok.”
“But-“
“It’s not a big deal. Let’s not talk about it. We need to get back.” Said Kibum, subtly wiping his eyes.
“Yessir.” The two others mumbled. The subject was obviously closed for now.
Minho hoisted Jjong over his shoulder into a fireman’s carry and they set off back down the slope, the captain leading the way out in front.
“…Psst Jjong.”
“Hmm?” Jjong answered, not too pleased with this humiliating mode of transportation, or what had just happened... or at how numb his extremities were becoming.
“What did I miss back there? Why did he go off like that?”
“Ummm… I might have tried to flirt with him…”
“Ah.” Said Minho. “That wouldn’t have gone down well.”
“Obviously… Why did he flip out at you though??”
“I guess he thinks that you only tried it on because you know me and I know him… I mean… you wouldn- why did you do it anyway??”
“I dunno. I just couldn’t help myself.”
“You do realise how much worse that could have gone don’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“It could have gone worse for him too.” Minho mumbled guiltily.
“Hmm... wait, is he even-”
“Of course he is- aren’t you?” Minho wasn’t really asking. Jjong sort of wanted to know when he’d caught on. He might ask later.
“Of course I am- is that a-?
“It’s not a problem Jjong~” probably a good thing seeing as he currently had his groin pressed into Minho’s shoulder.
“Thank you.”
“You’re a lucky man.” Minho said, adding a skip in his step deliberately. Jonghyun suddenly wasn’t so sure about that statement.
*
As they made it back to camp the sun was setting behind the hills. Kibum led them into the small hospital block and down the corridor to one of the examination rooms, where Minho deposited a shivering Jonghyun on the table before leaving them to see to the rest of the squadron. Kibum and Jjong were left sat in an uncomfortable silence together… again… Thankfully it didn’t last long as Onew came in to deal with the patient.
“So what’s this then? Did someone try to end Jonghyun? I don’t blame them. Take off the captain’s jacket and we’ll have a look.”
“Oh not you too.” Said Kibum.
“Not me what?” Replied Jinki obliviously, sticking a thermometer in Jjong’s mouth.
“Nothing… continue.” He waved him on.
“Well…” Said Jinki, prodding Jonghyun in a doctorly sort of way. “He’s not permanently damaged, nothing seems to be broken… and he’s not hypothermic either, but he is cold and dirty... So are you for that matter. Men aren’t built to go out in the snow without coats on you know. No matter how heroic they are.”
“So?”
“So, you are going to take private Jonghyun into the bathroom and help him to shower… warming yourself up in the process. Then you are going to bring him back in here and I’ll patch him up.”
The captain’s eyes darted nervously to Jonghyun, who was careful not to show any reaction. He didn’t know what was appropriate anymore. The private felt a little sick. He couldn’t tell if it was the cold or his nerves. After what had happened in the woods this was going to be horribly awkward. Not that it wouldn’t have been under any circumstances, but now… with Kibum…
…Across the corridor Kibum deposited him on a wooden bench outside the shower and they both began to undress awkwardly, avoiding looking at one another. This was too weird. Things had happened too fast back there in the woods and Jonghyun couldn’t tell where this was heading. The captain was still more obviously shaken than he was and he felt like he ought to be the one to do or say something to ease the tension - but he had no idea where to even begin without risking setting him off again.
"Can you get up by yourself?"
Jonghyun shook his head.
He winced as Kibum caught a sore part of his arm to drag him up by. The captain seemed to notice though and looped a arm around his waist for support… He looked so much softer out of his uniform and Jonghyun couldn’t believe that he was being permitted to get so close. Even though it didn't make sense he felt as though he was somehow invading the captain's privacy. Still, there was nothing he could do except sling his arm over Kibum's shoulders so they could wobble crab-like towards the shower.
This was embarrassing and far too intimate. What had Jinki been thinking sending them in here together? Maybe if they were ‘~normal’ men then this would be fine. Maybe it should have been fine anyway - but Jonghyun had fucked up any chance of that hadn’t he.
Kibum turned on the tap with his spare hand, testing the water’s heat before nudging them into the spray together. They stood there silently for a moment whilst the warm water washed over them. Jjong let it continue until he couldn't bear it any longer.
"What do we do now?"
"We stand here until you're clean." Kibum replied. Jjong felt his chest move against his side as he spoke. Maybe talking wasn't so good.
"You're not going to help then?" Why did say anything?
Kibum sighed through his nose trying to control himself. "I'm helping enough already." That was fine, Jonghyun really didn't want the captain's hands running all over him. Nope, not even a little bit. "Unless you want me to drop you again."
"... But if I was dow-" He let the suggestion die in his mouth before he'd said it, yet Kibum still seemed to catch on because he went completely stiff... Jjong couldn't get away with this could he? Did he dare? But if the captain was game then...
He'd never imagined that he'd be in this position and he really didn't know what to do now that he was here. The captain was so tempting? But also so?.. there were just so many reasons why this was a terrible idea... But how often had Jonghyun thought about it in the last few weeks. Imagined Kibum, naked, losing control under him, panting, mewling, eyes, lips, hands- More times than he’d admitted to even himself.
The water continued to pound down on them, numbing his senses, Jjong’s head felt as hazy as the steam rising around them. He still couldn't bear it. He rolled his shoulders experimentally as the heat loosened them up, just to see how Kibum would react to the movement...
He was trying not to look, lips pursed in a thin line. Cute.
Jonghyun grew bolder, using his spare hand to card through his hair, tipping his chin back and closing his eyes to the spray... The fingers around his waist twitched... This was so wrong. He could still back out at this point... So could Kibum.
He shifted the arm around Kibum's shoulder. Just enough to seem deliberate... Kibum leant into it.
Shit, what now? Jonghyun shuffled as he thoug-Whoa!-
Kibum had had to pull Jjong tighter to prevent his slip from talking them both down. The movement spun him flush against the captain’s chest, his face pressed into the other man's neck. All that soft skin touching his. Kibum gasped shakily, his pulse was quick under Jjong's lips. Was it fear or anticipation? Kibum wasn’t moving… or letting Jonghyun go, and Jjong could only hear the sound of the water and his panting breaths. He didn’t want to have to back away. He wanted to bite the collar bone already under his lips, he wanted to slide his hand up the nape of Kibum’s neck into his shaved hair, he wanted to press his thumb down further into the crease of Kibum’s hipbone where it was resting. He wanted so badly just to taste him. But first he had to be sure, really sure, that he was allowed.
He took a couple of seconds to savor the calm before the storm, then sighed and opened his eyes to face the captain. Kibum looked down at him, his face impossible to read through the rising steam. Jonghyun could feel that he was tensed as if ready to flinch backwards at any second, but his hands still held tightly onto him to keep him from falling. He realized that the captain’s expression probably mirrored his own. Uncertain. Wanting. How had they gotten to this point so suddenly again?
Jonghyun decided that it was one of those times in life when it was worth taking a risk. He’d gotten this close… He could feel Kibum’s hardness against his stomach… a little closer couldn’t possibly hurt now-
He made the first move cautiously, pushing up on his good foot to meet the captain’s lips, only lightly, just to test, before pulling back.
“Do you still think I’m being ‘over-familiar’?” His question hung in between them.
Kibum’s gaze was suddenly hungry. All apprehension was gone, replaced by his usual fierceness. ”Just shut up and get on with it private."
Jonghyun didn’t hold back this time. He crashed into the captain, sending them tumbling into the tiles. Kibum kissed back aggressively, their teeth clicking as he grabbed at Jonghyun to keep them both upright. Their restraint from before dissolved into total chaos as Jjong wedged a hand between them to grasp the captain's cock, stroking him mercilessly until his knees collapsed and they landed tangled together on the floor, fighting for dominance.
“Fuck!” Kibum gasped, as Jonghyun clambered on top of his thighs and aligned their lengths together. The water from above was pouring into captain’s eyes and mouth and he pulled the private back over him to kiss him again and protect him from the deluge. Jonghyun had no complaints; the captain’s ferociousness only spurred him on. Kibum felt so animal, all of his muscles tensing and arching, his fingers tugging roughly at Jonghyun's short hair. So much pristine skin to be kissed and marked and owned.
Kibum flipped them without warning and Jonghyun grunted as his back hit the floor, silenced by the other man sucking his tongue into his mouth for another savage kiss, before he pulled away, biting the private's lip as he went.
“Fuck. You monster.” Jonghyun said, spitting blood out onto the tiles.
“You like it~” Kibum dragged his hands down Jonghyun’s toned chest appreciatively, his mouth curled at the edges. “I’m not wrong am I~”
Jjong’s jaw dropped as Kibum brought two fingers to his mouth. "Suck it for me babe." Jjong didn’t know what he’d done to deserve this, but he obeyed. It was almost too unreal.
When he considered the job done, Kibum took the fingers and reached behind himself, eyelashes fluttering as he worked his way in. Jjong's hands inched up his thighs, but they were smacked down firmly "Pssht."
Instead he grasped the base of his cock, to steady it as Kibum lowered himself onto him, slowly, water and spit not easing the way much, and Jonghyun shuddered as he was enveloped by tight heat.
Kibum settled himself fully down, thigh’s quivering, before bracing himself on Jonghyun’s shoulders and lifting himself up until only the head was still inside, tortuously circling his hips. Jjong whimpered. Kibum cackled, digging his fingernails into his pectorals as he continued to torment him.
“You play dirty Kitty~” Jonghyun teased his captain, delivering a sharp pinch to his milky thigh.
Kibum slapped him across the face, just hard enough to make a noise, Jonghyun was too shocked to retaliate. The sting was electrifying.
“And as I said… you like it.” He replied, quickening his pace.
“I like it.” Jonghyun agreed.
“Good. Now say my name,” he gasped as he rode him harder, droplets flying from his skin. Jjong meeting his thrusts from below, desperate to take as much of Kibum as he could.
“Fuck… Kibum!~“
Jjong’s back was aching from the hard tiles, but he couldn’t feel anything apart from Kibum above him. He was so beautiful in that moment, so natural, head thrown back, lost in pleasure. Jonghyun wanted to experience every part of him, taste every inch, but in the end all he could taste was blood and clean water.
Chapter 5
Jonghyun woke up wincing. There was the normal, sharp pain in his ear from the morning bell, plus the pain in his ankle, plus his bruises from last night. Without the physical evidence of yesterday making itself known as he attempted to go though the motions of the morning stretches, he would have thought that it was all a wild dream.
After they were (erm…) finished in the showers, Kibum had made a wordless and speedy exit and left Jjong to go back to Jinki alone. The doctor hadn’t said anything and he was so difficult to read that Jonghyun couldn’t tell if that was out of tact or genuine ignorance. Jonghyun was by that point too shell shocked to really take in what Onew had said to him about his ankle, but the gist of it was definitely ‘stay off it for a bit.’ He had no idea what he was supposed to do instead.
Soon enough his questions were answered for him by the arrival of Soowook to take roll call.
“NUMBER OFF!”
“1”, “2”, “3”, “4”, “5”- “HAETAE!” The same as every day.
After reciting the morning announcements the lieutenant told Jonghyun that he was free until 700 hours, then he was to report to the captain’s office for duty. He didn’t know what to make of that at all. The thought of seeing Kibum again, alone, made him nervous… for both good and bad reasons.
The irrational part of his brain immediately kicked into gear, imagining all of the terrible things that could happen. Kibum had left him yesterday without saying anything. What if he’d had second thoughts? He felt upset? Violated? Would Kibum transfer him? Punish him? What if he was about to be dragged in front of the major to be court-martialed for seducing a senior officer? Was he about to get blackmailed? Shouted at? Defenestrated?.. Hang on that one made no sense.
By the time Jjong knocked on the office door he’d convinced himself that this was a great opportunity for more sex. Kibum was a man after all, and Jonghyun was, if nothing else, willing, capable, and now even convenient. It was only logical that he should enter confidently…
“Good morning sir!”
Oh shit, Kibum looked ready to scalp him. Jjong visibly wilted.
“Ah, Private Kim” Said Kibum, completely without emotion as he snapped his laptop shut. “I need you to go through these files and sort them into piles of ‘completed’ and ‘ongoing’. Then I need you to do the same with those ones.” He motioned to a huge stack on the floor, ”and those ones.” An even bigger stack behind the door. “Take meals as usual with your squadron. I’ll be out for most of the day, but when I’m in here don’t bother me… What’s with that face?.. You are literate aren’t you?”
Jjong felt like ice had been tipped down his back. That cold fucker had read through his personnel file and seen that he hadn’t finished school. Jjong just knew it. Fuck.
“Yes, sir.”
The captain flounced off, leaving Jjong alone to brew. This wasn’t going to stop him from imagining the captain’s o-face as revenge. Talk about sending mixed messages.
*
Filing was so boring. So, so boring. Thank god he’d never be a salary man because this was more mind numbing than 100 hours of drill. He was almost wishing that the captain would come back and shoot him. Or at least do something to him. Kibum was much more entertaining than admin, even if he was a bitch.
Just that moment Kibum came in, stomped across the room and collapsed into his chair, looking even pissier than usual. Not that Jonghyun cared or anything.
“Good afternoon honey! I mean sir! How was your morning~“ He asked sarcastically, knowing that it would provoke the other.
“Go rot in a hole Jonghyun, I am NOT your honey! And I don’t even know what you’re talking about!”
“You read my personnel file.” He confronted the hot-tempered captain, setting his hands on his desk.
“So?” Asked the confused and irritated captain. “Of course I’ve read it. I’m your commanding officer, I read it ages ago.”
“Yeah… but that comment was-“ Hurtful, if he was honest. Jjong knew that Kibum thought very little of him as a soldier. That was something that he’d accepted. But it hadn’t crossed his mind that Kibum could think little of him in other ways. It jut hadn’t connected…
“I know it was… and I’m sorry… Ok?” Said Kibum, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Suddenly Jjong felt pity for him, he looked so ragged and tired slumped in his chair. Like he was about to fray at the edges. “Um… yes? I guess so… Of course you’ve read it.” He realized then that he had a lot more power over the captain than he’d thought about. Sure Kibum had his records, but Kibum had also let Jjong in on more secrets about himself than it was safe to.
“Listen, Kibum. If you want me to forget everything… I can do that.”
“No. Don’t do that” Kibum sighed, running his hand through his hair and resting his face in his palms. “I can’t tell you to forget it. I can only trust you not to talk about it. I have no choice.”
“Why wouldn’t you trust me?”
“I don’t know? Maybe because I don’t really know you? What do you really have to lose from telling? Sure you’ll be kicked out of the army, suffer a bit of shame. But I don’t know if you’d care? And what about after you go? I’ll still be here. You could end me if you wanted to.”
“We fucked in a shower. We. Why would I sell you out for that? Unless you’re planning on giving me a motive? And even then, I’m not malicious enough to mess up your career. I know what that’s like-”
“But you’re already messing up my career.” Kibum cut across him.
“What? How on eart-“
“Didn’t you read those files?” Shock and mortification bloomed on the captain’s face, “Oh my god you aren’t really illiterate are you??” He slapped a hand over his mouth.
“Nooo!” Jonghyun couldn’t help but laugh at him. He looked so young like that. “I can read perfectly well thanks… They were just marked secret… and besides they’re really boring.” He added reasonably.
“Ugh,” He huffed, settling back into his more normal, haughty demeanor, “no wonder you suck hard at anything that involves strategic thinking.” The captain found so many faults in him that Jonghyun was surprised he hadn’t been handed a written evaluation of last night’s performance. “Look. I’m in charge of this section right?”
“Well the major-“ Jjong began, but was stopped by a stern glare. “Yes, right.”
“So how you all perform reflects back onto me… You don’t improve, therefore I look incompetent, therefore I don’t get promoted. See?”
“Oh… sorry??” He didn’t know if he really was sorry. Kibum’s job performance was his own business, but he still felt sorry for him in an abstract sort of way.
“Well you better be. You know you really are beyond useless.” Said the captain, pointing a finger at him.
“I have many uses~” Jonghyun grinned suggestively. It was worth a go.
“Nice try. But fuck off, it’s lunch time and I’m not in the mood.”
*
When Jonghyun returned after lunch Kibum ignored him. He’d said at the beginning of the day that he’d ignore him… but now that he was actually doing it, it had the feeling of a power game. Jjong decided that he wanted to play along in his own puppyish way. Besides, what’s dignity worth when you’ve spent the better part of a day limping and curiously horny?
Unfortunately Jjong quickly realized that he was at a disadvantage - having no clue at all how to file ‘sexily’. He settled instead for not filing at all and just staring at Kibum, waiting for a response. Kibum, meanwhile, seemed to have mastered the art of charismatically filling forms. That made literally no sense and it was unnatural that he could do that. Maybe they taught it in the military academy.
“Hey captain!”
“Yes Pervert- sorry I mean Private Kim?” Bastard.
“”Nothing captain. I was just observing how dynamically you fill out forms. I’m sure that skill hasn’t gone unnoticed by our senior officers~”
The captain didn’t look up. “Not everyone tries to use their sex appeal to get special treatment~ Some of us work hard.” he hummed.
“Well I guess that the general might not be interested, but not everyone has your natural feminine grace-“
“Watch it.“ He still hadn’t looked up yet, ticking away at his forms.
“- I mean the lower ranks aren’t immune to your charms either. Just look at lieutenant Soowook.”
“Stop trying to make your self feel better Jonghyun, we both know that there’s only one person who’s obsessed with me here... Soowook is just prepared to kiss ass to get a good report”
“AND YOU LET HIM!??” Jjong asked with mock astonishment.
That made Kibum laugh out loud. He threw his head back howling and smacked the table with his hand. Jonghyun had never seen anything like it from the captain. It was brilliant. He felt like there was a balloon inflating in chest and he couldn’t help but join in. If he could he’d like to make Kibum laugh like that every day-
Abruptly the laughter stopped. Jonghyun realized that Kibum was now behind his chair, looming over him, his hands weighing down on his shoulders… The hands slid tantalizingly down the front of his uniform as the captain leant down to brush against his ear. The atmosphere in the room had completely changed and it now felt heavy with suggestion.
“Would you care if I did?”
Jonghyun gulped. Kibum had upped the stakes...
“~Tell me you don’t like me.” Kibum asked, curling his fingers in Jonghyun’s shirt. He felt like prey being toyed with by a big cat.
“… I don’t like you?”
“Good, because I don’t like you either…”
“You seem to-“
“Whatever gave you that idea?” Kibum swung himself around the chair to settle in Jonghyun’s lap. Jjong didn’t know how he was managing to stay calm. The captain leant in, his nails teasing the back of Jonghyun’s neck. He could feel Kibum’s breath meet his in the narrow gap between their mouths. The private looked at the pretty man on top of him, pretty but in a dangerous sort of way. Sharp eyes, sharp cheekbones, sharp jaw, but soft lips. Jjong desperately wanted to kiss them, but didn’t feel so brave as he had done before. Kibum rolled his hips forwards to make a point.
“Shit!” Jjong gasped.
Kibum just chuckled and stepped off him. “Well… not as much as you like me.” He smirked. “You’re dismissed for the day. Enjoy your evening ~Private.”
*
Jonghyun was confused… well he was and he wasn’t. He was disquieted. He knew exactly what he wanted, and he was pretty sure he was going to get at least part of it. What confused him was how he’d gotten so lucky, and more disturbingly, how long it would last? This whole affair was really doomed to end either in flames, or in him getting frozen out. There was no earthly way that he could keep Kibum, and even if he did manage it then he’d be in danger of getting too attached and leaving the army broken hearted. He was just going to have to live in the moment and take what he could get without getting emotional about it - but that was easier said than… Whatever. His foremost concern was how to make the most of his time in the captain’s office.
And so, a sleep deprived Jonghyun lurched his was upstairs to the office for another day of work. Kibum was sitting at his desk, business face firmly on.
“Sit down private, I need you to type up these notes for me.”
“So we’re back to ignor¬-“
“No~ I just need you to do this.”
“Yes sir.” Jjong complied reluctantly and sat down at the other desk. He turned on the computer and got obediently to work tapping away at the keyboard. Typing was boring. He snuck a glance over at the captain, who had his feet kicked up on his desk and was observing him, fiddling with his pen.
“You seem like you want to say something… sir.” Jjong said with as much insinuation as he could muster.
“Actually I don’t want to ~say anything.” Kibum replied coyly.
“… well they do say that actions speak louder than words.” Jonghyun urged. The day was looking up already.
“Do they now?” Kibum stretched himself, showing off his long neck. He wanted to bite it. “They also say that the pen is mightier than the sword, but that implies a contradiction. If you’re a songwriter, like the records say, then what’s mightier? Your pen or your sword?”
“This analogy is really tacky... Besides I find that one inspires the other.” He added stiffly.
“If it’s so tacky then why did you play along?”
Jonghyun shrugged and grinned at him.
“Hmf. Well. You’re hardly a man of action so I’m betting on the pen.”
“Kibum there’s no need to constantly rub in how useless I am, not when I’m doing your paperwork for you.”
“And who said you could call me Kibum?” Kibum slid off his chair and sauntered over to sit on Jjong’s notes, crossing his legs neatly. Jonghyun leant back so that he was looking at the captain’s face rather than his crotch. He didn’t know which was more dangerous actually.
“Besides-“ the captain continued, flicking Jjong on the nose with his pen, “being useless is one of your charms.”
Jonghyun bristled a little. “Why do I feel like I’m doing all of your work for you, and you’re just taking the day off? I was injured in the line of duty, if anything you should be doing my work.”
“You don’t have any work for me to do dumbo. I can’t march around the parade ground on your behalf... And is this so bad?” He ran his booted foot up the private’s arm. “I can always put in a formal request for you to be reassigned, but whatever job they give you might not have the same kind of perks as this one.”
“I’m yet to see any perks.” Jjong grumbled, half meaning it.
“Stop cheeking your senior officers and you might.” Kibum flicked him on the nose again playfully and Jonghyun snapped playfully at the offending pen. The captain was clearly thrilled with this situation now that he’d gotten round to the idea that Jjong could be trusted. He was pretty much radiating impish glee at this point, and Jonghyun couldn’t help but be infected by it too.
“Never! You have no power over me oh glorious leader Kim.” announced Jonghyun, crossing his arms.
“That’s simply not true. I do.” Well a fact was a fact. “Furthermore, you’re a textbook case. A recruit who rebels because they want attention… Tell me, do you want my attention Private Kim Jonghyun?”
“You’re calling me an attention seeker…? When you’re the one sitting on my papers… like some overgrown man-cat?” Kibum raised an eyebrow and looked down his nose at him. Jjong caught on after a second. “I mean Yes Sir!”
“Good boy.” Kibum said as he shimmied of the desk onto his knees.
“I’m taking this as evidence that you do like me you know.”
“Whatever.”
Kibum ran his hands up the insides of Jjong’s thighs, making him wriggle embarrassingly. The captain pushed them apart and knelt in between them, long fingers deftly unhooking his belt and taking out his semi-hard erection. Jjong watched with wide eyes as he held it gently, lightly running his thumb along the underside. He whimpered and shifted a little waiting for Kibum to do something with it.
Kibum looked impatient. “Tell me.”
“…?”
“I want you to say it Jonghyun.”
Oh... Well if that was what he wanted then Jjong was happy to oblige him...
Jonghyun narrowed his gaze and dragged his thumb along the captain’s lower lip, thinking about how it would feel on him. “Suck it.” He ordered.
His hands went straight for Kibum’s hair as the captain took him right to the hilt without hesitation, hands knocking the beret from the officer’s head as his fingers carded through the black hair. Kibum leant into his touch, changing his angle and sucking harder, making Jonghyun cry out.
“Quiet” muttered Kibum, pulling off for a second, before going back to licking around the head with pink kitten flicks. Jonghyun didn’t notice him sneaking a finger to press behind his balls.
“Fuck.” he panted, finding it hard to contain himself, “fuck.” The captain just smirked and hummed. Jonghyun growled and pressed down on the back of his neck and Kibum complied happily, taking him into his throat again, clearly enjoying the manhandling. He looked so in his element with his captain’s epaulettes on and a dick in his mouth, it was so wrong. Jonghyun shut his eyes tight, he knew that he wasn’t going to last much longer even without the visual of his commander’s heart-shaped lips around his cock.
Jonghyun gritted his teeth as he came hard down Kibum’s throat. When he dared to look down, the captain looked as smug as he ever had, delicately wiping the remains of Jonghyun’s orgasm from the sides of his mouth.
Chapter 6
“Jjong~ Jjong! Jonghyun! Jjonggie~ Hey fuck-face, wake up!” Taemin snapped his fingers in front of Jonghyun’s nose.
“Huh?”
“What do you think you’re doing spacing out like that? Spacing out is my job. Quit stealing my job and entertain me.”
“Sorry Minnie~”
“Eugh” Taemin registered his disgust at the nickname. “Come on, talk to me man, I’m bored. Let me in on one of your bullshit ‘deep’ meditations, tell me a sad story, tell me what it was like to have white hair, anything.” Jonghyun knew when was being made fun of… and he missed his white hair. Military haircuts were part of the system of oppression… and they were unflattering.
He and Taemin were on guard duty. It was some time after eleven, it was dark and it was snowing. The floodlights illuminated everything nearby with an eerie, orange glow and beyond it’s reach Jjong thought he could see the glinting eyes of forest creatures. He was probably imagining that though. No animal in their right mind would want to loiter around the camp edge, not unless they wanted to get caught in the coils of razor wire that snaked around the perimeter… or accidentally shot. They were sat in a little wooden hut on stilts, it had no door or windows - just holes, but to prevent them from freezing to death there was a single gas heater on the floor. It was currently burning his toes off whilst the rest of him got frostbite. Still, better than getting frostbite everywhere.
Taemin was scrutinizing from underneath his helmet.“… You were thinking about something dirty weren’t you~”
“Huh!? I absolutely was not!”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of at your age you know.” Outrageous. “Come on hyung, you can share… are you missing your girlfriend~ do you miss the way she- mff whhpphh phwwmm” Jonghyun had grabbed the little bastard and covered his mouth.
“Gahh, Get - off - me - you - dirty - old - man!” complained Taemin, batting Jonghyun off and following it up with a grin that said ‘only kidding.’
“Don’t blink at me young man, no one is ever buying your innocent act again after what you wrote on the shower walls.” It’d been filthy. Somehow Jonghyun had been the one made to clean it off.
To add insult to injury Jonghyun had been thinking about something dirty, the four days he’d spent working in the captain’s office had given him plenty of material to work with. Kibum hadn’t held back at all after the second day and a week later Jonghyun still had the marks to prove it. However, since going back to active duty he’d barely seen the captain and he was more confused than ever about how he felt about him.
Kibum had never given Jjong any indication that what they were doing was anything more than a bit of fun. He had kept him firmly at an arm’s length the whole time, quickly deflecting any questions that he considered too personal. Now that they didn’t have a private space and a convenient excuse to be together, the fun seemed to be over. Possibly for the best. He didn’t see how their arrangement could work under normal conditions. Yet Jonghyun still rather hoped that if the situation ~arose Kibum would be more than willing to pick up where they had left off…
“Hey… what makes you think I have a girlfriend? Didn’t I say that I was single?”
“Yeah we all know that you’re a sad loner who only talks to his sister on the phone (although some of us think that’s just one of your kinks-)” That allegation scared poor Jonghyun for life… so he didn’t feel bad about swatting Taemin around the ears.
“I thought that you respected me both as a hyung and as a musician?”
“All respect I had for you as a musician left when you started singing that AOA song in the showers last week.”
“Fair- although I lost all respect for you when you danced along to it…“
“Still, no man should sing that high Jjong.” He said shaking his head. “It sounded like the captain had stepped on your balls-“
“I did no such thing.”
“CHRIST!” Taemin practically fell off his chair at their captain’s sudden appearance. “I mean SIR! HAETAE YES SIR WHATEVER you say sir-“ He struggled to salute.
“Private you clearly aren’t fit for duty, go down to the mess and get a cup of coffee… and then think about how important it is to be alert and vigilant at all times.”
“Yessir…and should I come back...?”
Kibum glared him down. “You have half an hour.”
“Yes sir, thank you sir.” Taemin saluted and practically skipped away, pleased to get out of the hut. Jonghyun wondered how he’d explain this to him later.
“What?? He’s not going to suspect anything. He’s a total innocent.” Said Kibum fondly. It was Jjong’s turn to roll his eyes for once.
An awkward silence developed. Jonghyun filled it by thinking about how pretty Kibum looked in the orange light… and how unfair it was that he wasn’t a regular private like Taemin. That way they could spend a whole night out here together.
“Why haven’t you called me?”
“…” Kibum looked at him like he was an idiot..
“You know what I mean…”
“It’d look suspicious” The captain replied, stony faced.
“And that didn’t just then? You can’t seriously believe that Taemin won’t ask questions? He’s not an idiot.”
“I’m well aware-”
“And you expect me to deal with it?” Jjong asked in disbelief. Kibum could be so difficult when he wanted to get his own way, he knew that already.
“I don’t see why not. It’s not like he’s ever said anything about Minho and me either. It’s a calculated risk.”
“Yes aaaand that’s another thing. I know you’ve been with Minho last week.”
Kibum sighed in exasperation at Jonghyun’s nagging. “Are you really going to get jealous, because if you are I’ll leave you to it.” He got up as if to go.
“No, that’s not what I meant!” Jjong said a little too desperately. “…I know that I have no right…”
The captain cocked his head to the side, looking confused at Jonghyun’s defeatist tone. “When did I say that you had no right?” It was Jonghyun’s turn to look puzzled. “You have no reason...”
“… so are you saying that I do have a right?” They’d never said anything about being committed, what was Kibum getting at? Were they ‘together’ now?
“No.” Ok, maybe not then. “… I’m saying that you could have the right if you accept that you’ll never have a good reason.”
“I’m sorry I don’t follow.” It was far to late in the day to be cryptic.
“Hfff” Kibum breathed though his nose to gather himself. He seemed reluctant to put into words what he had to say. “OK… This isn’t the first time I’ve had an ~arrangement on base.” He looked a little sheepish, but now that Jonghyun was more intimately acquainted with the captain he couldn’t say he was particularly shocked.
Kibum continued. “Not with a regular soldier before, but still, it never works well. Duty gets in the way, people get transferred, gossip gets around… That kind of thing.”
Jonghyun nodded along, worried about where this was going.
“If you would like to continue this, we have to be level-headed… I will do what I can, but I cannot tear down the army or my own career to spend time with you. Understand.”
“Yessir.” Jonghyun had honestly expected something worse. He still didn’t quite understand what Kibum was offering him, but it sounded better than nothing.
“And we have to trust each other.”
“Yessir.”
“And stop ‘Yessir-ing’ me in private - it’s weird now.”
“Sorry.”
“Hmph. Seriously, I thought you’d want to take a break from hierarchy whenever you can, you seem to really hate it.”
Jonghyun didn’t know why he was touched that Kibum had noticed that about him. In any other situation he would have phrased it as another of his failings. “I do… I’m just a little scared of getting my head bitten off.”
“Take whatever you can get Jjonggie.”
Interesting... “So what can I get… Kibummie~”
“Eugh” Kibum snorted at the endearment, crossing his arms huffily.
Jonghyun wasn’t fooled. He could tell that the captain wasn’t nearly as repulsed by affection as he liked to pretend so he leant over to peck him on the cheek sweetly.
Kibum looked like he might have been blushing, but in the dark it was hard to tell. “Don’t turn romantic now, after I said all that about being sensible… you’re not going to win.”
“Me? Romantic? Never! I’m just taking whatever I can get” Jonghyun bundled Kibum off his chair and into his lap chuckling. The captain was really quite cuddly when he was flustered.
“Don’t bullshit me Kim. I can read you like a book. I know your type.” Jonghyun could tell that Kibum wasn’t really annoyed because he’d kissed him on the nose. He had the notion that he might be giving the captain exactly what he wanted too easily. Kibum was maybe softer than Jjong’s first impression of him, but he was still aware that the other would throw him under the bus the minute that he got in the way. Still… he’d been given a fair warning. And this was nice. Far too nice to let slip through his fingers.
Chapter 4
It was a freezing cold day, just like every other day for the past 5 weeks. Christmas had already come and gone and Jonghyun had taken to focusing on reaching his 100th day so that he could be granted a couple of day’s leave from the camp to see his family. Thankfully his first furlough would fall around the New Year holidays, because Jjong didn’t think he would have coped with the holiday otherwise.
Christmas on camp had been a surreal experience to say the least. In the morning parade had been replaced by hours of religious services in the chapel. Jjong had skipped them in favour of going to sit alone in the base’s library to write sad lyrics. That hadn’t happened though because he’d found Onew in there. They’d played monopoly instead, whilst Onew tried to tell him interesting facts about plant medicine that all sounded like they could have been jokes he just didn’t get. After that, at lunch, the section had all gathered in the cafeteria for party games and fake American food. Taemin had drawn Jjong’s name from the Secret Santa and gotten him a packet of instant ramen which, in an effort to be thoughtful, he’d tried to draw a dog on. The picture had just made Jonghyun cry because he missed his own dog but he appreciated the effort nonetheless.
So… on this cold, foggy afternoon in very late December, they were drilling on the parade ground. Jonghyun hated drilling. In his opinion it was both repetitive and pointless. Or the repetitiveness and the pointlessness was the point - instilling mindless discipline, and maybe being useful if someone important came to visit and they had to look smart. Captain Kibum, master of looking smart, was overseeing the drill.
“LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT….” shouted the sergeant major. Jjong still hated the sergeant major.
“ABOUT TURN! HALT!”
Jonghyun got the about turn bit right, but apparently not the halt. He spun out of control, slipping on the icy ground, fell into the superiorly coordinated Taemin next to him, and landed them both in a heap on the frozen dirt.
The officer loomed over them, looking very not-pleased.
“PRIVATE KIM JONGHYUN! WHAT WAS THAT? I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE SEEN SUCH A CLUMSY DISPLAY AND WORSE YOU HAVE ENDANGERED PRIVATE LEE!”
Jonghyun groaned, trying to disentangle himself from his fallen friend.
“DON’T EVEN TRY TO TALK BACK PRIVATE.” He hadn’t even tried, what the fuck? “IF YOU HAD GRITTED THE PARADE GROUND PROPERLY LAST NIGHT THEN THIS WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED, SO I AM HOLDING YOU SOLEY RESPONSIBLE… ACTUALLY, YOU WERE ALL SUPPOSED TO BE GRITTING THE PARADE GROUND LAST NIGHT... EVERYONE WE’RE GOING ON A RUN! SHIRTS OFF! MORNING CIRCUIT! [Captain if you could follow at the back to pick up stragglers] ON THE DOUBLE! GET MOVING!”
“YES SIR!”
WHAT? No shirts!? The sergeant major really was a tyrant, he thought as he stripped off his jacket and undershirt, leaving them on the ground with along with everyone else’s. Jonghyun thought that only people in the Special Forces units had to do this - like he’d seen on television. Everyone was going to be so annoyed with him when they got back. At least they were only running the morning route. It wasn’t very long, just up the hill into the woods, along, and down again. It only took about 20 minutes… but by then Jjong’s nipples might have frozen off…. and he needed them… for reasons.
*
As they got to the uphill section Jonghyun started to notice that something was wrong. It hadn’t mattered on the level ground, but now that they’d reached uneven terrain he could feel that the ankle that he’d spun on was dangerously numb and unstable, he wasn’t sure of where he was putting it and he was having to slow down to avoid rolling it on a lose sto-
“FUCkkk” Jonghyun tripped and tumbled over onto the rocky ground. That really fucking hurt.
“Jonghyun! You OK?” Some of his teammates rallied round to try and help him back up.
“Fuck no! Ahh-“
“What’s all this commotion?” Jonghyun heard the captain approaching.
“Sir! Private Jonghyun has fallen sir!”
“Again??” he questioned.
“Yes sir.”
“Well let’s look at him-“ Kibum’s face appeared above him, looking somehow amused, concerned and pissed off all at the same time. “Do you think you can walk on it?”
“Not really sir.” Jjong replied truthfully.
“Alright. Everyone, keep going, full speed, go report to the sergeant major and tell him what’s happened. I’ll get Private Kim to the hospital block.”
“Yes sir!”
And so Jjong was left, cold, shirtless, and alone with the captain, just the kind of thing he was dreading.
“You’re bleeding.”
“What? - I mean yes sir. Seems to be the case sir.” He looked down at his bare arms and they were indeed bleeding from a couple of scrapes and bad grazes. Kibum was looking at them too, checking him over for any more serious injuries. Jjong shivered, he knew that he was just looking but he could feel his skin prickling.
“You’ll get cold now you’ve stopped moving.”
Jonghyun bit back the impulse to say that of course he was already fucking cold, but then Kibum took off his own jacket and handed it to him. Jjong was touched - the captain didn’t have to do that.
As Kibum adjusted his undershirt Jjong tried not to focus on his collarbones and his gaze caught the captain’s dog-tags instead. “You’re younger than me.”
“What? Yes. Mind your own business private.” He said, flustered.
“Sorry sir…”
“I would have thought Minho had told you that anyway.”
“I…” Jonghyun was a little taken aback; he didn’t really expect the captain to ever mention his relationship with Minho in front of him. “He hasn’t really said anything about you… nothing specific I mean.”
“Hmmm? But you’ve asked.” It was more of a statement than a question, and Jonghyun suddenly felt embarrassed for trying to pry. “There’s no need to look so sorry. Everyone gossips you know.”
“Oh?”
“I’d be more insulted if I wasn’t talked about at least sometimes...”
What a funny thing for the captain to say, why was he being so… normal about this? Jonghyun wondered as the Captain hauled his newly clothed self off the ground.
“So you enjoy the attention?” he teased as Kibum struggled a little under his weight.
“Maybe - but if you tell anyone I said that I’ll drop you.”
“Well you’d have to be holding me at the time to do that~” Jjong said, totally reasonably. He wouldn’t be opposed to Kibum holding him under different circumstances. His hands were pleasingly large and he smelled a lot nicer than most soldiers. Although he was officially out of Jonghyun’s league in the army… out of the army Jjong wouldn’t have hesitated.
“Yah! Or I could drop you now and say it was an accident!”
“I’ll tell your boyfriend Minho then! He’ll believe me.”
Kibum dropped him. Jonghyun couldn’t say that he didn’t deserve it, even though it fucking hurt. Especially not when he saw the look in the captain’s eyes. He gulped; he’d taken it too far. Stupid.
Panic had crossed Kibum’s features. “What have you heard?” he hissed as he bent down to shake Jonghyun by the collar. “Who’s been saying that?”
“Shit it was a joke! No one said anything!” The captain was right up in his face and he did not look at all convinced. “I haven’t heard anything like that… And even if they had…” Jjong added more softly “I wouldn’t repeat it.” Kibum stopped shaking. He looked so vulnerable then, as if he were pleading with Jjong. And Jonghyun supposed that he was. A rumour like that could end his career. A rumour like that would mean disgrace for his family. Kibum had so much more to loose than he did. How could he have thought that flirting so casually with him was fair? Because flirting was what he’d been doing, there was no denying that.
Jonghyun was ready to grovel some more when a thumping noise announced a newcomer. Kibum sprang back. But it was only Minho, bouncing blithely into the scene, completely blind to the atmosphere between them.
“Good evening sir! Private.” He saluted, far too jovially for the atmosphere. “Can you not even lift his short-ass off the ground captain?”
“FOR FUCK’S SAKE MINHO COULD YOU FOR ONCE JUST NOT MAKE A FUCKING JOKE OUT OF MY CAREER!” Minho’s eyes bulged so wide that Jjong thought they’d fall out. “THIS MAY BE A NICE HOLIDAY FOR YOU, BUT THIS IS MY LIFE MINHO! IS IT THAT HARD TO JUST KEEP UP PRETENCE OF BEING PROFFESSIONAL IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE? FUCK YOU! I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE A FUCKING PROFFESSIONAL PRETENDER”
Poor Minho might as well have stepped on a landmine. “Kibum- Kibum! Calm down, this isn’t like you. What’s wrong?” Minho moved to hug the seething captain but got pushed back. “It’s only Jonghyun, he’s alright.”
Kibum looked close to tears.
“Nothing… Nothing’s happened Minho. I’m just stressed.”
“What did you do Jonghyun?” Minho asked sternly, rounding on him.
“I…” Jonghyun suddenly felt very on the spot.
“He did nothing, it’s not his fault. You’re right, he’s ok.”
“But-“
“It’s not a big deal. Let’s not talk about it. We need to get back.” Said Kibum, subtly wiping his eyes.
“Yessir.” The two others mumbled. The subject was obviously closed for now.
Minho hoisted Jjong over his shoulder into a fireman’s carry and they set off back down the slope, the captain leading the way out in front.
“…Psst Jjong.”
“Hmm?” Jjong answered, not too pleased with this humiliating mode of transportation, or what had just happened... or at how numb his extremities were becoming.
“What did I miss back there? Why did he go off like that?”
“Ummm… I might have tried to flirt with him…”
“Ah.” Said Minho. “That wouldn’t have gone down well.”
“Obviously… Why did he flip out at you though??”
“I guess he thinks that you only tried it on because you know me and I know him… I mean… you wouldn- why did you do it anyway??”
“I dunno. I just couldn’t help myself.”
“You do realise how much worse that could have gone don’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“It could have gone worse for him too.” Minho mumbled guiltily.
“Hmm... wait, is he even-”
“Of course he is- aren’t you?” Minho wasn’t really asking. Jjong sort of wanted to know when he’d caught on. He might ask later.
“Of course I am- is that a-?
“It’s not a problem Jjong~” probably a good thing seeing as he currently had his groin pressed into Minho’s shoulder.
“Thank you.”
“You’re a lucky man.” Minho said, adding a skip in his step deliberately. Jonghyun suddenly wasn’t so sure about that statement.
*
As they made it back to camp the sun was setting behind the hills. Kibum led them into the small hospital block and down the corridor to one of the examination rooms, where Minho deposited a shivering Jonghyun on the table before leaving them to see to the rest of the squadron. Kibum and Jjong were left sat in an uncomfortable silence together… again… Thankfully it didn’t last long as Onew came in to deal with the patient.
“So what’s this then? Did someone try to end Jonghyun? I don’t blame them. Take off the captain’s jacket and we’ll have a look.”
“Oh not you too.” Said Kibum.
“Not me what?” Replied Jinki obliviously, sticking a thermometer in Jjong’s mouth.
“Nothing… continue.” He waved him on.
“Well…” Said Jinki, prodding Jonghyun in a doctorly sort of way. “He’s not permanently damaged, nothing seems to be broken… and he’s not hypothermic either, but he is cold and dirty... So are you for that matter. Men aren’t built to go out in the snow without coats on you know. No matter how heroic they are.”
“So?”
“So, you are going to take private Jonghyun into the bathroom and help him to shower… warming yourself up in the process. Then you are going to bring him back in here and I’ll patch him up.”
The captain’s eyes darted nervously to Jonghyun, who was careful not to show any reaction. He didn’t know what was appropriate anymore. The private felt a little sick. He couldn’t tell if it was the cold or his nerves. After what had happened in the woods this was going to be horribly awkward. Not that it wouldn’t have been under any circumstances, but now… with Kibum…
…Across the corridor Kibum deposited him on a wooden bench outside the shower and they both began to undress awkwardly, avoiding looking at one another. This was too weird. Things had happened too fast back there in the woods and Jonghyun couldn’t tell where this was heading. The captain was still more obviously shaken than he was and he felt like he ought to be the one to do or say something to ease the tension - but he had no idea where to even begin without risking setting him off again.
"Can you get up by yourself?"
Jonghyun shook his head.
He winced as Kibum caught a sore part of his arm to drag him up by. The captain seemed to notice though and looped a arm around his waist for support… He looked so much softer out of his uniform and Jonghyun couldn’t believe that he was being permitted to get so close. Even though it didn't make sense he felt as though he was somehow invading the captain's privacy. Still, there was nothing he could do except sling his arm over Kibum's shoulders so they could wobble crab-like towards the shower.
This was embarrassing and far too intimate. What had Jinki been thinking sending them in here together? Maybe if they were ‘~normal’ men then this would be fine. Maybe it should have been fine anyway - but Jonghyun had fucked up any chance of that hadn’t he.
Kibum turned on the tap with his spare hand, testing the water’s heat before nudging them into the spray together. They stood there silently for a moment whilst the warm water washed over them. Jjong let it continue until he couldn't bear it any longer.
"What do we do now?"
"We stand here until you're clean." Kibum replied. Jjong felt his chest move against his side as he spoke. Maybe talking wasn't so good.
"You're not going to help then?" Why did say anything?
Kibum sighed through his nose trying to control himself. "I'm helping enough already." That was fine, Jonghyun really didn't want the captain's hands running all over him. Nope, not even a little bit. "Unless you want me to drop you again."
"... But if I was dow-" He let the suggestion die in his mouth before he'd said it, yet Kibum still seemed to catch on because he went completely stiff... Jjong couldn't get away with this could he? Did he dare? But if the captain was game then...
He'd never imagined that he'd be in this position and he really didn't know what to do now that he was here. The captain was so tempting? But also so?.. there were just so many reasons why this was a terrible idea... But how often had Jonghyun thought about it in the last few weeks. Imagined Kibum, naked, losing control under him, panting, mewling, eyes, lips, hands- More times than he’d admitted to even himself.
The water continued to pound down on them, numbing his senses, Jjong’s head felt as hazy as the steam rising around them. He still couldn't bear it. He rolled his shoulders experimentally as the heat loosened them up, just to see how Kibum would react to the movement...
He was trying not to look, lips pursed in a thin line. Cute.
Jonghyun grew bolder, using his spare hand to card through his hair, tipping his chin back and closing his eyes to the spray... The fingers around his waist twitched... This was so wrong. He could still back out at this point... So could Kibum.
He shifted the arm around Kibum's shoulder. Just enough to seem deliberate... Kibum leant into it.
Shit, what now? Jonghyun shuffled as he thoug-Whoa!-
Kibum had had to pull Jjong tighter to prevent his slip from talking them both down. The movement spun him flush against the captain’s chest, his face pressed into the other man's neck. All that soft skin touching his. Kibum gasped shakily, his pulse was quick under Jjong's lips. Was it fear or anticipation? Kibum wasn’t moving… or letting Jonghyun go, and Jjong could only hear the sound of the water and his panting breaths. He didn’t want to have to back away. He wanted to bite the collar bone already under his lips, he wanted to slide his hand up the nape of Kibum’s neck into his shaved hair, he wanted to press his thumb down further into the crease of Kibum’s hipbone where it was resting. He wanted so badly just to taste him. But first he had to be sure, really sure, that he was allowed.
He took a couple of seconds to savor the calm before the storm, then sighed and opened his eyes to face the captain. Kibum looked down at him, his face impossible to read through the rising steam. Jonghyun could feel that he was tensed as if ready to flinch backwards at any second, but his hands still held tightly onto him to keep him from falling. He realized that the captain’s expression probably mirrored his own. Uncertain. Wanting. How had they gotten to this point so suddenly again?
Jonghyun decided that it was one of those times in life when it was worth taking a risk. He’d gotten this close… He could feel Kibum’s hardness against his stomach… a little closer couldn’t possibly hurt now-
He made the first move cautiously, pushing up on his good foot to meet the captain’s lips, only lightly, just to test, before pulling back.
“Do you still think I’m being ‘over-familiar’?” His question hung in between them.
Kibum’s gaze was suddenly hungry. All apprehension was gone, replaced by his usual fierceness. ”Just shut up and get on with it private."
Jonghyun didn’t hold back this time. He crashed into the captain, sending them tumbling into the tiles. Kibum kissed back aggressively, their teeth clicking as he grabbed at Jonghyun to keep them both upright. Their restraint from before dissolved into total chaos as Jjong wedged a hand between them to grasp the captain's cock, stroking him mercilessly until his knees collapsed and they landed tangled together on the floor, fighting for dominance.
“Fuck!” Kibum gasped, as Jonghyun clambered on top of his thighs and aligned their lengths together. The water from above was pouring into captain’s eyes and mouth and he pulled the private back over him to kiss him again and protect him from the deluge. Jonghyun had no complaints; the captain’s ferociousness only spurred him on. Kibum felt so animal, all of his muscles tensing and arching, his fingers tugging roughly at Jonghyun's short hair. So much pristine skin to be kissed and marked and owned.
Kibum flipped them without warning and Jonghyun grunted as his back hit the floor, silenced by the other man sucking his tongue into his mouth for another savage kiss, before he pulled away, biting the private's lip as he went.
“Fuck. You monster.” Jonghyun said, spitting blood out onto the tiles.
“You like it~” Kibum dragged his hands down Jonghyun’s toned chest appreciatively, his mouth curled at the edges. “I’m not wrong am I~”
Jjong’s jaw dropped as Kibum brought two fingers to his mouth. "Suck it for me babe." Jjong didn’t know what he’d done to deserve this, but he obeyed. It was almost too unreal.
When he considered the job done, Kibum took the fingers and reached behind himself, eyelashes fluttering as he worked his way in. Jjong's hands inched up his thighs, but they were smacked down firmly "Pssht."
Instead he grasped the base of his cock, to steady it as Kibum lowered himself onto him, slowly, water and spit not easing the way much, and Jonghyun shuddered as he was enveloped by tight heat.
Kibum settled himself fully down, thigh’s quivering, before bracing himself on Jonghyun’s shoulders and lifting himself up until only the head was still inside, tortuously circling his hips. Jjong whimpered. Kibum cackled, digging his fingernails into his pectorals as he continued to torment him.
“You play dirty Kitty~” Jonghyun teased his captain, delivering a sharp pinch to his milky thigh.
Kibum slapped him across the face, just hard enough to make a noise, Jonghyun was too shocked to retaliate. The sting was electrifying.
“And as I said… you like it.” He replied, quickening his pace.
“I like it.” Jonghyun agreed.
“Good. Now say my name,” he gasped as he rode him harder, droplets flying from his skin. Jjong meeting his thrusts from below, desperate to take as much of Kibum as he could.
“Fuck… Kibum!~“
Jjong’s back was aching from the hard tiles, but he couldn’t feel anything apart from Kibum above him. He was so beautiful in that moment, so natural, head thrown back, lost in pleasure. Jonghyun wanted to experience every part of him, taste every inch, but in the end all he could taste was blood and clean water.
Chapter 5
Jonghyun woke up wincing. There was the normal, sharp pain in his ear from the morning bell, plus the pain in his ankle, plus his bruises from last night. Without the physical evidence of yesterday making itself known as he attempted to go though the motions of the morning stretches, he would have thought that it was all a wild dream.
After they were (erm…) finished in the showers, Kibum had made a wordless and speedy exit and left Jjong to go back to Jinki alone. The doctor hadn’t said anything and he was so difficult to read that Jonghyun couldn’t tell if that was out of tact or genuine ignorance. Jonghyun was by that point too shell shocked to really take in what Onew had said to him about his ankle, but the gist of it was definitely ‘stay off it for a bit.’ He had no idea what he was supposed to do instead.
Soon enough his questions were answered for him by the arrival of Soowook to take roll call.
“NUMBER OFF!”
“1”, “2”, “3”, “4”, “5”- “HAETAE!” The same as every day.
After reciting the morning announcements the lieutenant told Jonghyun that he was free until 700 hours, then he was to report to the captain’s office for duty. He didn’t know what to make of that at all. The thought of seeing Kibum again, alone, made him nervous… for both good and bad reasons.
The irrational part of his brain immediately kicked into gear, imagining all of the terrible things that could happen. Kibum had left him yesterday without saying anything. What if he’d had second thoughts? He felt upset? Violated? Would Kibum transfer him? Punish him? What if he was about to be dragged in front of the major to be court-martialed for seducing a senior officer? Was he about to get blackmailed? Shouted at? Defenestrated?.. Hang on that one made no sense.
By the time Jjong knocked on the office door he’d convinced himself that this was a great opportunity for more sex. Kibum was a man after all, and Jonghyun was, if nothing else, willing, capable, and now even convenient. It was only logical that he should enter confidently…
“Good morning sir!”
Oh shit, Kibum looked ready to scalp him. Jjong visibly wilted.
“Ah, Private Kim” Said Kibum, completely without emotion as he snapped his laptop shut. “I need you to go through these files and sort them into piles of ‘completed’ and ‘ongoing’. Then I need you to do the same with those ones.” He motioned to a huge stack on the floor, ”and those ones.” An even bigger stack behind the door. “Take meals as usual with your squadron. I’ll be out for most of the day, but when I’m in here don’t bother me… What’s with that face?.. You are literate aren’t you?”
Jjong felt like ice had been tipped down his back. That cold fucker had read through his personnel file and seen that he hadn’t finished school. Jjong just knew it. Fuck.
“Yes, sir.”
The captain flounced off, leaving Jjong alone to brew. This wasn’t going to stop him from imagining the captain’s o-face as revenge. Talk about sending mixed messages.
*
Filing was so boring. So, so boring. Thank god he’d never be a salary man because this was more mind numbing than 100 hours of drill. He was almost wishing that the captain would come back and shoot him. Or at least do something to him. Kibum was much more entertaining than admin, even if he was a bitch.
Just that moment Kibum came in, stomped across the room and collapsed into his chair, looking even pissier than usual. Not that Jonghyun cared or anything.
“Good afternoon honey! I mean sir! How was your morning~“ He asked sarcastically, knowing that it would provoke the other.
“Go rot in a hole Jonghyun, I am NOT your honey! And I don’t even know what you’re talking about!”
“You read my personnel file.” He confronted the hot-tempered captain, setting his hands on his desk.
“So?” Asked the confused and irritated captain. “Of course I’ve read it. I’m your commanding officer, I read it ages ago.”
“Yeah… but that comment was-“ Hurtful, if he was honest. Jjong knew that Kibum thought very little of him as a soldier. That was something that he’d accepted. But it hadn’t crossed his mind that Kibum could think little of him in other ways. It jut hadn’t connected…
“I know it was… and I’m sorry… Ok?” Said Kibum, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Suddenly Jjong felt pity for him, he looked so ragged and tired slumped in his chair. Like he was about to fray at the edges. “Um… yes? I guess so… Of course you’ve read it.” He realized then that he had a lot more power over the captain than he’d thought about. Sure Kibum had his records, but Kibum had also let Jjong in on more secrets about himself than it was safe to.
“Listen, Kibum. If you want me to forget everything… I can do that.”
“No. Don’t do that” Kibum sighed, running his hand through his hair and resting his face in his palms. “I can’t tell you to forget it. I can only trust you not to talk about it. I have no choice.”
“Why wouldn’t you trust me?”
“I don’t know? Maybe because I don’t really know you? What do you really have to lose from telling? Sure you’ll be kicked out of the army, suffer a bit of shame. But I don’t know if you’d care? And what about after you go? I’ll still be here. You could end me if you wanted to.”
“We fucked in a shower. We. Why would I sell you out for that? Unless you’re planning on giving me a motive? And even then, I’m not malicious enough to mess up your career. I know what that’s like-”
“But you’re already messing up my career.” Kibum cut across him.
“What? How on eart-“
“Didn’t you read those files?” Shock and mortification bloomed on the captain’s face, “Oh my god you aren’t really illiterate are you??” He slapped a hand over his mouth.
“Nooo!” Jonghyun couldn’t help but laugh at him. He looked so young like that. “I can read perfectly well thanks… They were just marked secret… and besides they’re really boring.” He added reasonably.
“Ugh,” He huffed, settling back into his more normal, haughty demeanor, “no wonder you suck hard at anything that involves strategic thinking.” The captain found so many faults in him that Jonghyun was surprised he hadn’t been handed a written evaluation of last night’s performance. “Look. I’m in charge of this section right?”
“Well the major-“ Jjong began, but was stopped by a stern glare. “Yes, right.”
“So how you all perform reflects back onto me… You don’t improve, therefore I look incompetent, therefore I don’t get promoted. See?”
“Oh… sorry??” He didn’t know if he really was sorry. Kibum’s job performance was his own business, but he still felt sorry for him in an abstract sort of way.
“Well you better be. You know you really are beyond useless.” Said the captain, pointing a finger at him.
“I have many uses~” Jonghyun grinned suggestively. It was worth a go.
“Nice try. But fuck off, it’s lunch time and I’m not in the mood.”
*
When Jonghyun returned after lunch Kibum ignored him. He’d said at the beginning of the day that he’d ignore him… but now that he was actually doing it, it had the feeling of a power game. Jjong decided that he wanted to play along in his own puppyish way. Besides, what’s dignity worth when you’ve spent the better part of a day limping and curiously horny?
Unfortunately Jjong quickly realized that he was at a disadvantage - having no clue at all how to file ‘sexily’. He settled instead for not filing at all and just staring at Kibum, waiting for a response. Kibum, meanwhile, seemed to have mastered the art of charismatically filling forms. That made literally no sense and it was unnatural that he could do that. Maybe they taught it in the military academy.
“Hey captain!”
“Yes Pervert- sorry I mean Private Kim?” Bastard.
“”Nothing captain. I was just observing how dynamically you fill out forms. I’m sure that skill hasn’t gone unnoticed by our senior officers~”
The captain didn’t look up. “Not everyone tries to use their sex appeal to get special treatment~ Some of us work hard.” he hummed.
“Well I guess that the general might not be interested, but not everyone has your natural feminine grace-“
“Watch it.“ He still hadn’t looked up yet, ticking away at his forms.
“- I mean the lower ranks aren’t immune to your charms either. Just look at lieutenant Soowook.”
“Stop trying to make your self feel better Jonghyun, we both know that there’s only one person who’s obsessed with me here... Soowook is just prepared to kiss ass to get a good report”
“AND YOU LET HIM!??” Jjong asked with mock astonishment.
That made Kibum laugh out loud. He threw his head back howling and smacked the table with his hand. Jonghyun had never seen anything like it from the captain. It was brilliant. He felt like there was a balloon inflating in chest and he couldn’t help but join in. If he could he’d like to make Kibum laugh like that every day-
Abruptly the laughter stopped. Jonghyun realized that Kibum was now behind his chair, looming over him, his hands weighing down on his shoulders… The hands slid tantalizingly down the front of his uniform as the captain leant down to brush against his ear. The atmosphere in the room had completely changed and it now felt heavy with suggestion.
“Would you care if I did?”
Jonghyun gulped. Kibum had upped the stakes...
“~Tell me you don’t like me.” Kibum asked, curling his fingers in Jonghyun’s shirt. He felt like prey being toyed with by a big cat.
“… I don’t like you?”
“Good, because I don’t like you either…”
“You seem to-“
“Whatever gave you that idea?” Kibum swung himself around the chair to settle in Jonghyun’s lap. Jjong didn’t know how he was managing to stay calm. The captain leant in, his nails teasing the back of Jonghyun’s neck. He could feel Kibum’s breath meet his in the narrow gap between their mouths. The private looked at the pretty man on top of him, pretty but in a dangerous sort of way. Sharp eyes, sharp cheekbones, sharp jaw, but soft lips. Jjong desperately wanted to kiss them, but didn’t feel so brave as he had done before. Kibum rolled his hips forwards to make a point.
“Shit!” Jjong gasped.
Kibum just chuckled and stepped off him. “Well… not as much as you like me.” He smirked. “You’re dismissed for the day. Enjoy your evening ~Private.”
*
Jonghyun was confused… well he was and he wasn’t. He was disquieted. He knew exactly what he wanted, and he was pretty sure he was going to get at least part of it. What confused him was how he’d gotten so lucky, and more disturbingly, how long it would last? This whole affair was really doomed to end either in flames, or in him getting frozen out. There was no earthly way that he could keep Kibum, and even if he did manage it then he’d be in danger of getting too attached and leaving the army broken hearted. He was just going to have to live in the moment and take what he could get without getting emotional about it - but that was easier said than… Whatever. His foremost concern was how to make the most of his time in the captain’s office.
And so, a sleep deprived Jonghyun lurched his was upstairs to the office for another day of work. Kibum was sitting at his desk, business face firmly on.
“Sit down private, I need you to type up these notes for me.”
“So we’re back to ignor¬-“
“No~ I just need you to do this.”
“Yes sir.” Jjong complied reluctantly and sat down at the other desk. He turned on the computer and got obediently to work tapping away at the keyboard. Typing was boring. He snuck a glance over at the captain, who had his feet kicked up on his desk and was observing him, fiddling with his pen.
“You seem like you want to say something… sir.” Jjong said with as much insinuation as he could muster.
“Actually I don’t want to ~say anything.” Kibum replied coyly.
“… well they do say that actions speak louder than words.” Jonghyun urged. The day was looking up already.
“Do they now?” Kibum stretched himself, showing off his long neck. He wanted to bite it. “They also say that the pen is mightier than the sword, but that implies a contradiction. If you’re a songwriter, like the records say, then what’s mightier? Your pen or your sword?”
“This analogy is really tacky... Besides I find that one inspires the other.” He added stiffly.
“If it’s so tacky then why did you play along?”
Jonghyun shrugged and grinned at him.
“Hmf. Well. You’re hardly a man of action so I’m betting on the pen.”
“Kibum there’s no need to constantly rub in how useless I am, not when I’m doing your paperwork for you.”
“And who said you could call me Kibum?” Kibum slid off his chair and sauntered over to sit on Jjong’s notes, crossing his legs neatly. Jonghyun leant back so that he was looking at the captain’s face rather than his crotch. He didn’t know which was more dangerous actually.
“Besides-“ the captain continued, flicking Jjong on the nose with his pen, “being useless is one of your charms.”
Jonghyun bristled a little. “Why do I feel like I’m doing all of your work for you, and you’re just taking the day off? I was injured in the line of duty, if anything you should be doing my work.”
“You don’t have any work for me to do dumbo. I can’t march around the parade ground on your behalf... And is this so bad?” He ran his booted foot up the private’s arm. “I can always put in a formal request for you to be reassigned, but whatever job they give you might not have the same kind of perks as this one.”
“I’m yet to see any perks.” Jjong grumbled, half meaning it.
“Stop cheeking your senior officers and you might.” Kibum flicked him on the nose again playfully and Jonghyun snapped playfully at the offending pen. The captain was clearly thrilled with this situation now that he’d gotten round to the idea that Jjong could be trusted. He was pretty much radiating impish glee at this point, and Jonghyun couldn’t help but be infected by it too.
“Never! You have no power over me oh glorious leader Kim.” announced Jonghyun, crossing his arms.
“That’s simply not true. I do.” Well a fact was a fact. “Furthermore, you’re a textbook case. A recruit who rebels because they want attention… Tell me, do you want my attention Private Kim Jonghyun?”
“You’re calling me an attention seeker…? When you’re the one sitting on my papers… like some overgrown man-cat?” Kibum raised an eyebrow and looked down his nose at him. Jjong caught on after a second. “I mean Yes Sir!”
“Good boy.” Kibum said as he shimmied of the desk onto his knees.
“I’m taking this as evidence that you do like me you know.”
“Whatever.”
Kibum ran his hands up the insides of Jjong’s thighs, making him wriggle embarrassingly. The captain pushed them apart and knelt in between them, long fingers deftly unhooking his belt and taking out his semi-hard erection. Jjong watched with wide eyes as he held it gently, lightly running his thumb along the underside. He whimpered and shifted a little waiting for Kibum to do something with it.
Kibum looked impatient. “Tell me.”
“…?”
“I want you to say it Jonghyun.”
Oh... Well if that was what he wanted then Jjong was happy to oblige him...
Jonghyun narrowed his gaze and dragged his thumb along the captain’s lower lip, thinking about how it would feel on him. “Suck it.” He ordered.
His hands went straight for Kibum’s hair as the captain took him right to the hilt without hesitation, hands knocking the beret from the officer’s head as his fingers carded through the black hair. Kibum leant into his touch, changing his angle and sucking harder, making Jonghyun cry out.
“Quiet” muttered Kibum, pulling off for a second, before going back to licking around the head with pink kitten flicks. Jonghyun didn’t notice him sneaking a finger to press behind his balls.
“Fuck.” he panted, finding it hard to contain himself, “fuck.” The captain just smirked and hummed. Jonghyun growled and pressed down on the back of his neck and Kibum complied happily, taking him into his throat again, clearly enjoying the manhandling. He looked so in his element with his captain’s epaulettes on and a dick in his mouth, it was so wrong. Jonghyun shut his eyes tight, he knew that he wasn’t going to last much longer even without the visual of his commander’s heart-shaped lips around his cock.
Jonghyun gritted his teeth as he came hard down Kibum’s throat. When he dared to look down, the captain looked as smug as he ever had, delicately wiping the remains of Jonghyun’s orgasm from the sides of his mouth.
Chapter 6
“Jjong~ Jjong! Jonghyun! Jjonggie~ Hey fuck-face, wake up!” Taemin snapped his fingers in front of Jonghyun’s nose.
“Huh?”
“What do you think you’re doing spacing out like that? Spacing out is my job. Quit stealing my job and entertain me.”
“Sorry Minnie~”
“Eugh” Taemin registered his disgust at the nickname. “Come on, talk to me man, I’m bored. Let me in on one of your bullshit ‘deep’ meditations, tell me a sad story, tell me what it was like to have white hair, anything.” Jonghyun knew when was being made fun of… and he missed his white hair. Military haircuts were part of the system of oppression… and they were unflattering.
He and Taemin were on guard duty. It was some time after eleven, it was dark and it was snowing. The floodlights illuminated everything nearby with an eerie, orange glow and beyond it’s reach Jjong thought he could see the glinting eyes of forest creatures. He was probably imagining that though. No animal in their right mind would want to loiter around the camp edge, not unless they wanted to get caught in the coils of razor wire that snaked around the perimeter… or accidentally shot. They were sat in a little wooden hut on stilts, it had no door or windows - just holes, but to prevent them from freezing to death there was a single gas heater on the floor. It was currently burning his toes off whilst the rest of him got frostbite. Still, better than getting frostbite everywhere.
Taemin was scrutinizing from underneath his helmet.“… You were thinking about something dirty weren’t you~”
“Huh!? I absolutely was not!”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of at your age you know.” Outrageous. “Come on hyung, you can share… are you missing your girlfriend~ do you miss the way she- mff whhpphh phwwmm” Jonghyun had grabbed the little bastard and covered his mouth.
“Gahh, Get - off - me - you - dirty - old - man!” complained Taemin, batting Jonghyun off and following it up with a grin that said ‘only kidding.’
“Don’t blink at me young man, no one is ever buying your innocent act again after what you wrote on the shower walls.” It’d been filthy. Somehow Jonghyun had been the one made to clean it off.
To add insult to injury Jonghyun had been thinking about something dirty, the four days he’d spent working in the captain’s office had given him plenty of material to work with. Kibum hadn’t held back at all after the second day and a week later Jonghyun still had the marks to prove it. However, since going back to active duty he’d barely seen the captain and he was more confused than ever about how he felt about him.
Kibum had never given Jjong any indication that what they were doing was anything more than a bit of fun. He had kept him firmly at an arm’s length the whole time, quickly deflecting any questions that he considered too personal. Now that they didn’t have a private space and a convenient excuse to be together, the fun seemed to be over. Possibly for the best. He didn’t see how their arrangement could work under normal conditions. Yet Jonghyun still rather hoped that if the situation ~arose Kibum would be more than willing to pick up where they had left off…
“Hey… what makes you think I have a girlfriend? Didn’t I say that I was single?”
“Yeah we all know that you’re a sad loner who only talks to his sister on the phone (although some of us think that’s just one of your kinks-)” That allegation scared poor Jonghyun for life… so he didn’t feel bad about swatting Taemin around the ears.
“I thought that you respected me both as a hyung and as a musician?”
“All respect I had for you as a musician left when you started singing that AOA song in the showers last week.”
“Fair- although I lost all respect for you when you danced along to it…“
“Still, no man should sing that high Jjong.” He said shaking his head. “It sounded like the captain had stepped on your balls-“
“I did no such thing.”
“CHRIST!” Taemin practically fell off his chair at their captain’s sudden appearance. “I mean SIR! HAETAE YES SIR WHATEVER you say sir-“ He struggled to salute.
“Private you clearly aren’t fit for duty, go down to the mess and get a cup of coffee… and then think about how important it is to be alert and vigilant at all times.”
“Yessir…and should I come back...?”
Kibum glared him down. “You have half an hour.”
“Yes sir, thank you sir.” Taemin saluted and practically skipped away, pleased to get out of the hut. Jonghyun wondered how he’d explain this to him later.
“What?? He’s not going to suspect anything. He’s a total innocent.” Said Kibum fondly. It was Jjong’s turn to roll his eyes for once.
An awkward silence developed. Jonghyun filled it by thinking about how pretty Kibum looked in the orange light… and how unfair it was that he wasn’t a regular private like Taemin. That way they could spend a whole night out here together.
“Why haven’t you called me?”
“…” Kibum looked at him like he was an idiot..
“You know what I mean…”
“It’d look suspicious” The captain replied, stony faced.
“And that didn’t just then? You can’t seriously believe that Taemin won’t ask questions? He’s not an idiot.”
“I’m well aware-”
“And you expect me to deal with it?” Jjong asked in disbelief. Kibum could be so difficult when he wanted to get his own way, he knew that already.
“I don’t see why not. It’s not like he’s ever said anything about Minho and me either. It’s a calculated risk.”
“Yes aaaand that’s another thing. I know you’ve been with Minho last week.”
Kibum sighed in exasperation at Jonghyun’s nagging. “Are you really going to get jealous, because if you are I’ll leave you to it.” He got up as if to go.
“No, that’s not what I meant!” Jjong said a little too desperately. “…I know that I have no right…”
The captain cocked his head to the side, looking confused at Jonghyun’s defeatist tone. “When did I say that you had no right?” It was Jonghyun’s turn to look puzzled. “You have no reason...”
“… so are you saying that I do have a right?” They’d never said anything about being committed, what was Kibum getting at? Were they ‘together’ now?
“No.” Ok, maybe not then. “… I’m saying that you could have the right if you accept that you’ll never have a good reason.”
“I’m sorry I don’t follow.” It was far to late in the day to be cryptic.
“Hfff” Kibum breathed though his nose to gather himself. He seemed reluctant to put into words what he had to say. “OK… This isn’t the first time I’ve had an ~arrangement on base.” He looked a little sheepish, but now that Jonghyun was more intimately acquainted with the captain he couldn’t say he was particularly shocked.
Kibum continued. “Not with a regular soldier before, but still, it never works well. Duty gets in the way, people get transferred, gossip gets around… That kind of thing.”
Jonghyun nodded along, worried about where this was going.
“If you would like to continue this, we have to be level-headed… I will do what I can, but I cannot tear down the army or my own career to spend time with you. Understand.”
“Yessir.” Jonghyun had honestly expected something worse. He still didn’t quite understand what Kibum was offering him, but it sounded better than nothing.
“And we have to trust each other.”
“Yessir.”
“And stop ‘Yessir-ing’ me in private - it’s weird now.”
“Sorry.”
“Hmph. Seriously, I thought you’d want to take a break from hierarchy whenever you can, you seem to really hate it.”
Jonghyun didn’t know why he was touched that Kibum had noticed that about him. In any other situation he would have phrased it as another of his failings. “I do… I’m just a little scared of getting my head bitten off.”
“Take whatever you can get Jjonggie.”
Interesting... “So what can I get… Kibummie~”
“Eugh” Kibum snorted at the endearment, crossing his arms huffily.
Jonghyun wasn’t fooled. He could tell that the captain wasn’t nearly as repulsed by affection as he liked to pretend so he leant over to peck him on the cheek sweetly.
Kibum looked like he might have been blushing, but in the dark it was hard to tell. “Don’t turn romantic now, after I said all that about being sensible… you’re not going to win.”
“Me? Romantic? Never! I’m just taking whatever I can get” Jonghyun bundled Kibum off his chair and into his lap chuckling. The captain was really quite cuddly when he was flustered.
“Don’t bullshit me Kim. I can read you like a book. I know your type.” Jonghyun could tell that Kibum wasn’t really annoyed because he’d kissed him on the nose. He had the notion that he might be giving the captain exactly what he wanted too easily. Kibum was maybe softer than Jjong’s first impression of him, but he was still aware that the other would throw him under the bus the minute that he got in the way. Still… he’d been given a fair warning. And this was nice. Far too nice to let slip through his fingers.