Sigh.
I'm still alive. Not that anyone reads what I write, anyway. Do I even still exist to anyone? Probably not.
But, I intend to update this silly thing. Maybe tomorrow after work. Yay for working longer than I'm supposed to because someone's sick! ...Why don't I ever call in fucking sick? Because noone would believe I would be sick enough to not come in, because I 'always' show up and I always do my job.
... Why can't I trust people, either? I'm gullible, but I know when people are whispering about me. It's sad..and depressing. But, I'm finding myself giving less and less of a shit, as I progress through these first few months. All I want to do is just be happy. Is that too much to fucking ask? Happiness? Is there anyone who gives a damn about me anymore? Hell if I know. Who do you trust when you don't trust yourself?
Class...Work...Class..Work..Class..Work. That's all I ever do. If I'm not doing one, I'm guaranteed practically, to be doing the other. I get a few hours to relax, then it's off to bed, to rest for the next day. Where's the fun? There is no fun. Only work, and studying, and writing, and preparation. Is this really what I want to do with my life? I hope so. Because I'm gearing up for it.
And, I guess that's it, really. I'll write in greater detail what I've been up to, when I have the energy for it.
Ja ne'.
Ishy~
But, I intend to update this silly thing. Maybe tomorrow after work. Yay for working longer than I'm supposed to because someone's sick! ...Why don't I ever call in fucking sick? Because noone would believe I would be sick enough to not come in, because I 'always' show up and I always do my job.
... Why can't I trust people, either? I'm gullible, but I know when people are whispering about me. It's sad..and depressing. But, I'm finding myself giving less and less of a shit, as I progress through these first few months. All I want to do is just be happy. Is that too much to fucking ask? Happiness? Is there anyone who gives a damn about me anymore? Hell if I know. Who do you trust when you don't trust yourself?
Class...Work...Class..Work..Class..Work. That's all I ever do. If I'm not doing one, I'm guaranteed practically, to be doing the other. I get a few hours to relax, then it's off to bed, to rest for the next day. Where's the fun? There is no fun. Only work, and studying, and writing, and preparation. Is this really what I want to do with my life? I hope so. Because I'm gearing up for it.
And, I guess that's it, really. I'll write in greater detail what I've been up to, when I have the energy for it.
Ja ne'.
Ishy~