I just remembered
how I used to sleep with my phone in one hand, pressed against the pillow beside my head, knowing he would text me at three or four in the morning and not wanting to miss it.
I remember he used to pat me on the head.
I remember how happy he was about the birthday cake, how it was the first time someone had ever made him one.
The more I try to forget, the more I remember, and the more I realize how different things have been since our relationship became long-distance. I don't think either of us has been happy for a long time.
No matter how much I try to forget, I really did love him, and I still want to believe in him so badly that it hurts more than anything else. I need to understand him; I don't think I can move on until I do.
I can't stop crying.
I remember he used to pat me on the head.
I remember how happy he was about the birthday cake, how it was the first time someone had ever made him one.
The more I try to forget, the more I remember, and the more I realize how different things have been since our relationship became long-distance. I don't think either of us has been happy for a long time.
No matter how much I try to forget, I really did love him, and I still want to believe in him so badly that it hurts more than anything else. I need to understand him; I don't think I can move on until I do.
I can't stop crying.