(no subject)
althought things arent as great as Id like for them to be and Im not doing as much as I hoped Id being doing ... Im glad, to say the least, that Im doing good with what I am doing at the moment.
as much as I hate people and working in retail - as much as I want to stab every person in the face and knock them all senseless - as much as I just want to throw things around and not give a fuck or take my work too seriously - I manage to go into work everyday with a good attitude. Im peppy and "happy". My manager caught me running around the store singing and dancing one day and wanted to know why the fuck I was so happy. I replied, "Im not! Im just trying to trick myself!"
today she tells me that she wants to train me to become assistant manager. It definately made my day to hear that my work was appreciated and that she totally thought I would be great for the part. its not a huge promotion or something I want to do for a living. Its not going to earn me millions but it will give me a much better pay and Im just in love with the fact that even though I feel apart of me has died a little I know I have the strength and determination to go on with my life and not have my personal problems hold me back from anything that I can do. call me lame but I feel proud and feel as if this is only the beginning of what Im to accomplish this year.
I kept telling myself I would make this year better than the last. the last few actually. I lost sight of that the last couple of weeks because my head wasnt in the right place.
...and I still miss him. more than ever. more than I probably should because Im most likely not even a thought in his head anymore - Im not afraid to admit the weakness he causes me because I no that know matter what I say or how I feel, I can do anything on my own. anything.
as much as I hate people and working in retail - as much as I want to stab every person in the face and knock them all senseless - as much as I just want to throw things around and not give a fuck or take my work too seriously - I manage to go into work everyday with a good attitude. Im peppy and "happy". My manager caught me running around the store singing and dancing one day and wanted to know why the fuck I was so happy. I replied, "Im not! Im just trying to trick myself!"
today she tells me that she wants to train me to become assistant manager. It definately made my day to hear that my work was appreciated and that she totally thought I would be great for the part. its not a huge promotion or something I want to do for a living. Its not going to earn me millions but it will give me a much better pay and Im just in love with the fact that even though I feel apart of me has died a little I know I have the strength and determination to go on with my life and not have my personal problems hold me back from anything that I can do. call me lame but I feel proud and feel as if this is only the beginning of what Im to accomplish this year.
I kept telling myself I would make this year better than the last. the last few actually. I lost sight of that the last couple of weeks because my head wasnt in the right place.
...and I still miss him. more than ever. more than I probably should because Im most likely not even a thought in his head anymore - Im not afraid to admit the weakness he causes me because I no that know matter what I say or how I feel, I can do anything on my own. anything.