Fic: Hugs and Kisses (pre-Eliot/Parker/Hardison, PG)
Title: Hugs and Kisses
Author: sheryden
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1053
Pairing: Pre-Parker/Eliot/Hardison, one-sided Parker/McSweeten
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: If they were mine, Eliot would be shirtless in every episode.
Summary: When Agent McSweeten gives her a note after a job, Parker asks Eliot and Hardison to explain the strange language he used.
Notes: This was written as part of the leverageland Big Bang.
It was a Friday night, and McRory’s was bursting at the seams with people. Eliot, Parker, and Hardison were sitting at their usual booth enjoying a companionable silence. Earlier in the evening, the boys had kicked around the idea of going to a movie, but thus far, neither of them had deigned to move from their seats.
Eliot was thumbing through a magazine and trying to pretend like he wasn’t checking out the new redhead that Cora had hired last week. For some reason, Nate seemed overly protective of the waitresses and bartenders at McRory’s. Eliot could understand Nate’s rapport with Cora, but why he got his boxers in a bunch every time Eliot casually smiled at one of the other girls, he didn’t know.
The redhead turned and glanced in Eliot’s direction. He smiled sweetly, but she rolled her eyes and walked over to a couple of frat boys at the other end of the bar. Deflated, he laid down his magazine and decided to broach the subject of a movie with Hardison again.
“Let’s get out of here,” he said.
Hardison didn’t bother to glance up from his laptop. “What’s out there that’s worth me leaving this game when I’m beating the crap out of everyone?”
Eliot smirked at him. “Real life?”
“I’m still not feeling it.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Eliot could see Parker staring at him. Not watching because she was listening to the conversation, but honest-to-goodness staring. Plastering a scowl on his face, he turned to her. “What?”
Shaking her head, she said, “Agent McSweeten is very odd.”
Agent McSweeten. Or as Eliot and Hardison had taken to calling him when Parker wasn’t around-Agent McDork. He and his partner at the Bureau had been unwitting allies of the team since back in their LA days. Almost immediately, Parker’s longstanding alias, Agent Hagen, had become the subject of McSweeten’s puppy love. Whenever they ran into each other on jobs, he followed her around with a lovesick look on his face. And even though he seemed like a genuinely good guy, Eliot and Hardison had spent more than one night plotting his grisly demise over pizza and beer.
“What does he have to do with anything?” Eliot asked gruffly.
Holding up a folded piece of notebook paper, she said, “When I worked with him on this last job, he handed me a note before I left.”
Eliot and Hardison exchanged glances. “Okay,” Eliot said. “Read it.”
She glared at it as though it smelled like rotten eggs. “It says,
Dear Special Agent Hagen,
It was GREAT working with you again. We should really run into each other when we’re not on the job. Ha ha.”
Hardison bit his lip to suppress a grin. “Aw, you got a little love note.”
Shaking her head, she said, “It doesn’t make any sense. First of all, how can I run into him when we’re not on the job? I don’t have any reason to run into him if we’re not doing a job. And second, he signed it in a weird language.”
“What’s the word?” Eliot asked. “Spell it.”
Parker screwed up her face. “XOXOXOXO. “
Eliot and Hardison gave each other face-splitting grins. Snatching the note from Parker’s hands, Eliot scrutinized it for a moment. Sure enough, the little display of endearment was scratched out in blue ink. “It means hugs and kisses,” he said, handing the note back to her.
“In what language?”
“In dorky thinks-he’s-romantic junior high language,” Hardison said with a chuckle. When Parker gave him an odd look, he added, “He likes you, mama.”
She cocked her head in thought for a moment, then nodded. “He’s very nice. It’s almost like he’s a friend.”
Taking a swig of lukewarm beer, Eliot said, “That’s not how he likes you, sweetheart.”
“I don’t get it.”
“He wants to be your boyfriend, Parker.”
Suddenly, the note was tossed onto the table as if it were about to explode. “That’s very odd.”
“Look,” Eliot said with a smile. “He’s sweet on you. It’s no big deal. This is just his way of telling you how he feels.”
“This means he likes me.”
“He likes likes you,” Hardison said with a grin.
Eliot gave him a look. “Seriously?”
Hardison shrugged. “I was going with the whole junior high theme.”
“Agent McSweeten isn’t in junior high,” Parker told them.
“We know, Parker,” Eliot said. "Look, he’s trying to be romantic. It’s like buying someone flowers or something. But it’s, you know, cutesy. It just means he’s interested in being more than friends.”
“Do I have to be more than friends with him back?”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Hardison told her. “The note’s his way of seeing if you like him without having to say it face-to-face.”
Parker bit her lip and glanced at each of the boys. After a moment, She picked up the note and stuffed it into her pocket. Climbing over Eliot, she turned toward the door. “I’m going to go work on my harness.”
The boys watched her leave, then Hardison leaned over the table. “Should we go have a little talk with Agent McDork?”
“You gonna rough him up?” Eliot asked with a raised eyebrow. “I’d really like to see you do that.”
“I was kind of thinking you’d do the roughing up, and I’d glare menacingly. I can be menacing.”
“Your Nana’s probably more menacing than you.”
Nodding, Hardison closed his laptop. “That’s for damn sure. You still up for that movie?”
***
The next morning, Eliot and Hardison breezed into Nate’s apartment. They could hang out somewhere else, sure, but Nate’s kitchen was fully stocked, and he had an obscene amount of sports channels. Their Saturday afternoon was all set.
As Hardison rooted through the refrigerator for snacks, Eliot walked over to scoop the remote control off the table. Next to the remote was a note scrawled in Parker’s handwriting and addressed to Eliot and Hardison.
“Hey,” Eliot said, motioning for Hardison to join him. “C’mere.”
Hardison wandered over, gummi frogs, orange soda, chips, and beer weighing down his arms. He deposited the snacks onto the table and peered over Eliot’s shoulder as Eliot unfolded the note. It read:
Dear Eliot and Hardison,
Nate’s out of milk. XOXOXOXO
Master Fic List
Author: sheryden
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1053
Pairing: Pre-Parker/Eliot/Hardison, one-sided Parker/McSweeten
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: If they were mine, Eliot would be shirtless in every episode.
Summary: When Agent McSweeten gives her a note after a job, Parker asks Eliot and Hardison to explain the strange language he used.
Notes: This was written as part of the leverageland Big Bang.
It was a Friday night, and McRory’s was bursting at the seams with people. Eliot, Parker, and Hardison were sitting at their usual booth enjoying a companionable silence. Earlier in the evening, the boys had kicked around the idea of going to a movie, but thus far, neither of them had deigned to move from their seats.
Eliot was thumbing through a magazine and trying to pretend like he wasn’t checking out the new redhead that Cora had hired last week. For some reason, Nate seemed overly protective of the waitresses and bartenders at McRory’s. Eliot could understand Nate’s rapport with Cora, but why he got his boxers in a bunch every time Eliot casually smiled at one of the other girls, he didn’t know.
The redhead turned and glanced in Eliot’s direction. He smiled sweetly, but she rolled her eyes and walked over to a couple of frat boys at the other end of the bar. Deflated, he laid down his magazine and decided to broach the subject of a movie with Hardison again.
“Let’s get out of here,” he said.
Hardison didn’t bother to glance up from his laptop. “What’s out there that’s worth me leaving this game when I’m beating the crap out of everyone?”
Eliot smirked at him. “Real life?”
“I’m still not feeling it.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Eliot could see Parker staring at him. Not watching because she was listening to the conversation, but honest-to-goodness staring. Plastering a scowl on his face, he turned to her. “What?”
Shaking her head, she said, “Agent McSweeten is very odd.”
Agent McSweeten. Or as Eliot and Hardison had taken to calling him when Parker wasn’t around-Agent McDork. He and his partner at the Bureau had been unwitting allies of the team since back in their LA days. Almost immediately, Parker’s longstanding alias, Agent Hagen, had become the subject of McSweeten’s puppy love. Whenever they ran into each other on jobs, he followed her around with a lovesick look on his face. And even though he seemed like a genuinely good guy, Eliot and Hardison had spent more than one night plotting his grisly demise over pizza and beer.
“What does he have to do with anything?” Eliot asked gruffly.
Holding up a folded piece of notebook paper, she said, “When I worked with him on this last job, he handed me a note before I left.”
Eliot and Hardison exchanged glances. “Okay,” Eliot said. “Read it.”
She glared at it as though it smelled like rotten eggs. “It says,
Dear Special Agent Hagen,
It was GREAT working with you again. We should really run into each other when we’re not on the job. Ha ha.”
Hardison bit his lip to suppress a grin. “Aw, you got a little love note.”
Shaking her head, she said, “It doesn’t make any sense. First of all, how can I run into him when we’re not on the job? I don’t have any reason to run into him if we’re not doing a job. And second, he signed it in a weird language.”
“What’s the word?” Eliot asked. “Spell it.”
Parker screwed up her face. “XOXOXOXO. “
Eliot and Hardison gave each other face-splitting grins. Snatching the note from Parker’s hands, Eliot scrutinized it for a moment. Sure enough, the little display of endearment was scratched out in blue ink. “It means hugs and kisses,” he said, handing the note back to her.
“In what language?”
“In dorky thinks-he’s-romantic junior high language,” Hardison said with a chuckle. When Parker gave him an odd look, he added, “He likes you, mama.”
She cocked her head in thought for a moment, then nodded. “He’s very nice. It’s almost like he’s a friend.”
Taking a swig of lukewarm beer, Eliot said, “That’s not how he likes you, sweetheart.”
“I don’t get it.”
“He wants to be your boyfriend, Parker.”
Suddenly, the note was tossed onto the table as if it were about to explode. “That’s very odd.”
“Look,” Eliot said with a smile. “He’s sweet on you. It’s no big deal. This is just his way of telling you how he feels.”
“This means he likes me.”
“He likes likes you,” Hardison said with a grin.
Eliot gave him a look. “Seriously?”
Hardison shrugged. “I was going with the whole junior high theme.”
“Agent McSweeten isn’t in junior high,” Parker told them.
“We know, Parker,” Eliot said. "Look, he’s trying to be romantic. It’s like buying someone flowers or something. But it’s, you know, cutesy. It just means he’s interested in being more than friends.”
“Do I have to be more than friends with him back?”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Hardison told her. “The note’s his way of seeing if you like him without having to say it face-to-face.”
Parker bit her lip and glanced at each of the boys. After a moment, She picked up the note and stuffed it into her pocket. Climbing over Eliot, she turned toward the door. “I’m going to go work on my harness.”
The boys watched her leave, then Hardison leaned over the table. “Should we go have a little talk with Agent McDork?”
“You gonna rough him up?” Eliot asked with a raised eyebrow. “I’d really like to see you do that.”
“I was kind of thinking you’d do the roughing up, and I’d glare menacingly. I can be menacing.”
“Your Nana’s probably more menacing than you.”
Nodding, Hardison closed his laptop. “That’s for damn sure. You still up for that movie?”
***
The next morning, Eliot and Hardison breezed into Nate’s apartment. They could hang out somewhere else, sure, but Nate’s kitchen was fully stocked, and he had an obscene amount of sports channels. Their Saturday afternoon was all set.
As Hardison rooted through the refrigerator for snacks, Eliot walked over to scoop the remote control off the table. Next to the remote was a note scrawled in Parker’s handwriting and addressed to Eliot and Hardison.
“Hey,” Eliot said, motioning for Hardison to join him. “C’mere.”
Hardison wandered over, gummi frogs, orange soda, chips, and beer weighing down his arms. He deposited the snacks onto the table and peered over Eliot’s shoulder as Eliot unfolded the note. It read:
Dear Eliot and Hardison,
Nate’s out of milk. XOXOXOXO
Master Fic List