(no subject)
Title: The completely ludicrous, sex pollen is a major cause of evolution, Grim Reaper takes a Holiday, boys get coated in said pollen while the girls are having a night out Primeval fic.
Summary: See Title
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Slash, Smut, Dub-con, Not Betaed (Unless someone's interested), it's Crack people, OOC people, Seriously OOC.
Pairing: Everyone/everyone.
It had started with Helen coming through an anomaly, which, while not the most common occurrence, was normal enough for Connor not to be too worried.
The fact that she had apparently come through because, "She missed shopping", was also pretty much ignored by the young man.
Of course, Abby, Jenny and Claudia, (why Claudia was back, I have no clue, I just decided she was, okay), could not resist the phrase "Shopping Spree" then Abby's idea was to turn it into a fully fledged Girl's Night Out.
This was quickly backed by Jenny Threatening Lester with Full Volume Cat-Yodelling being programmed into all his music players if he dared call them for an anomaly that day.
Then it was back to normal at the ARC, Ryan and Becker were having some kind of alpha-male bonding time, which seemed to consist of beating each other to a pulp, followed by a curry-eating contest, followed by a mad rush as the entire gymnasium was emptied of everyone except them, as they tried to see whose gas was most likely to require a hazmat team.
While Nick and Stephen Manfully Squeed over the latest Dinosaur find, a one-eyed Creature called a Doyouthinkesaurus.
It was at this time that the anomaly detector went off. Lester went to pull The Two Scientists away from the new find, while Connor went, in full protective gear, to get the two captains.
Lester, deciding to have a bit of fun for once, came out of his office changing into street clothes, luckily Cutter managed to convince him that his clock necklace and the rest of the BLING needed to go, but Sir Lester refused to hand over his Fo-shizzle my Mizzle embroidered hoodie.
So off the boys went, to go through the anomaly.
Becker and Ryan, still in their alpha male hornlock, spent a good ten minutes trying to push their way into the anomaly so that finally Lester decided Stephen and Cutter would go first, followed by himself, then Connor, The two Jarheads could fight between themselves after that.
And with that announcement, Lester effectively turned Connor Temple's day weird. pushing and shoving, the two soldiers tumbled into Connor’s back just as he walked into the Anomaly.
He let out a cry he would forever deny was a squeak of terror, and tumbled down the 45 degree incline, rolling through a large number of bright pink flower bushes, throwing plumes of sweet smelling pollen into the air as he passed, and by the time he came to a stop, he looked like someone had dipped him in fairy floss.
Unable to catch their balance, the two soldiers grabbed hold of the nearest objects, all of whom objected strenuously to being grabbed as they themselves had nothing to grip in turn, which unfortunately meant they all followed the path Connor took, in much the same manner as he had done himself, headlong tumbling.
Surrounded by a group of suddenly very attractive men, Connor, who'd been amongst the disturbingly pink flowers the longest, did what any one of us readers would have done if put in the same position. He plastered himself to the nearest warm body and proceeded an attempt to remove that person's clothing by wiggling until the buttons came loose.
This did not work, apparently Tac vests are impossible to "wiggle" off, though the nice warm body, whom Connor now recognised as Becker decided to be helpful about the whole thing, squeezing his hands between himself and Connor's body, his very deft fingers rubbed against Connor's chest, as he tried to undo the vest that was an unconscionable barrier between Connor and his prize.
It took a few seconds for Connor to realise that during his attempts to remove Becker from his vest, Ryan had been removing Connor's clothes as well as stripping himself down, an act much appreciated by Connor's fuzzy mind, as was the pleasant spectacle of Nick, Stephen and Lester, about as far along as himself and the others.
But that no longer mattered, Becker was finally free of the pesky vest, and Ryan was waving a large, tasty treat in front of Connor's face, so he wrapped his mouth around it, this was done at the same time as he attempted to say something, so the sentence was muffled.
"What was that, Connor."
Connor pulled away from the treat to repeat what he'd said.
"If you're not over your curry blasts, I'll bite you."
"Fair enough," said Ryan, shoving himself back into Connor's mouth just as Becker had finally yanked the last items of clothing from himself.
A quick glance over at the other team members surprised Connor quite a bit; Sir James Lester was being thoroughly reamed from both ends, quite a contrast from what you'd expect from the normally in control bureaucrat.
"Oh well," thought Connor. "I'll be in the same position soon enough."
Apparently soon enough meant now. Connor had just enough time to wonder why Becker was carrying KY Jelly in one of his many pockets before he was stuffed full of slick, hard cock, the sudden movement making his hands scrabble at Ryan's thighs.
It was rather a rush after that, Connor's pleasured whimpers being drowned out amongst the cacophony of sounds, Ryan's fingers gripping his hair, as Becker's moans rumbled through his spine, followed by a sudden stillness and a rush of wet heat from both ends.
Pulling away from each other, Connor and the two soldiers waited for the others to finish.
It happened not long after them. Smoothing his hoodie down (somehow Lester had managed to keep it on), he stood up, sans trousers, and proceeded to give his best ‘tell me what happened or else’ growl, which still worked better in the suit.
Cutter immediately started into a babble of how the plant must have been what made evolution work, by making creatures of similar species, but not quite the same, go into a mating frenzy, much like the way they'd just done.
"Of course it is, but what will we put on the report?"
"Dangerous Plantlife, avoid if at all possible."
"Very well, it's not the best, but at least it's not the truth, that stays between us, agreed?"
A chorus of Yeses came from the group as they started pulling their clothes back on.
Lester, Nick and Stephen chose to ignore the way Connor leaned towards the two soldiers, as well as the whispered words coming from his mouth.
"We still on for tonight, guys?"
Summary: See Title
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Slash, Smut, Dub-con, Not Betaed (Unless someone's interested), it's Crack people, OOC people, Seriously OOC.
Pairing: Everyone/everyone.
It had started with Helen coming through an anomaly, which, while not the most common occurrence, was normal enough for Connor not to be too worried.
The fact that she had apparently come through because, "She missed shopping", was also pretty much ignored by the young man.
Of course, Abby, Jenny and Claudia, (why Claudia was back, I have no clue, I just decided she was, okay), could not resist the phrase "Shopping Spree" then Abby's idea was to turn it into a fully fledged Girl's Night Out.
This was quickly backed by Jenny Threatening Lester with Full Volume Cat-Yodelling being programmed into all his music players if he dared call them for an anomaly that day.
Then it was back to normal at the ARC, Ryan and Becker were having some kind of alpha-male bonding time, which seemed to consist of beating each other to a pulp, followed by a curry-eating contest, followed by a mad rush as the entire gymnasium was emptied of everyone except them, as they tried to see whose gas was most likely to require a hazmat team.
While Nick and Stephen Manfully Squeed over the latest Dinosaur find, a one-eyed Creature called a Doyouthinkesaurus.
It was at this time that the anomaly detector went off. Lester went to pull The Two Scientists away from the new find, while Connor went, in full protective gear, to get the two captains.
Lester, deciding to have a bit of fun for once, came out of his office changing into street clothes, luckily Cutter managed to convince him that his clock necklace and the rest of the BLING needed to go, but Sir Lester refused to hand over his Fo-shizzle my Mizzle embroidered hoodie.
So off the boys went, to go through the anomaly.
Becker and Ryan, still in their alpha male hornlock, spent a good ten minutes trying to push their way into the anomaly so that finally Lester decided Stephen and Cutter would go first, followed by himself, then Connor, The two Jarheads could fight between themselves after that.
And with that announcement, Lester effectively turned Connor Temple's day weird. pushing and shoving, the two soldiers tumbled into Connor’s back just as he walked into the Anomaly.
He let out a cry he would forever deny was a squeak of terror, and tumbled down the 45 degree incline, rolling through a large number of bright pink flower bushes, throwing plumes of sweet smelling pollen into the air as he passed, and by the time he came to a stop, he looked like someone had dipped him in fairy floss.
Unable to catch their balance, the two soldiers grabbed hold of the nearest objects, all of whom objected strenuously to being grabbed as they themselves had nothing to grip in turn, which unfortunately meant they all followed the path Connor took, in much the same manner as he had done himself, headlong tumbling.
Surrounded by a group of suddenly very attractive men, Connor, who'd been amongst the disturbingly pink flowers the longest, did what any one of us readers would have done if put in the same position. He plastered himself to the nearest warm body and proceeded an attempt to remove that person's clothing by wiggling until the buttons came loose.
This did not work, apparently Tac vests are impossible to "wiggle" off, though the nice warm body, whom Connor now recognised as Becker decided to be helpful about the whole thing, squeezing his hands between himself and Connor's body, his very deft fingers rubbed against Connor's chest, as he tried to undo the vest that was an unconscionable barrier between Connor and his prize.
It took a few seconds for Connor to realise that during his attempts to remove Becker from his vest, Ryan had been removing Connor's clothes as well as stripping himself down, an act much appreciated by Connor's fuzzy mind, as was the pleasant spectacle of Nick, Stephen and Lester, about as far along as himself and the others.
But that no longer mattered, Becker was finally free of the pesky vest, and Ryan was waving a large, tasty treat in front of Connor's face, so he wrapped his mouth around it, this was done at the same time as he attempted to say something, so the sentence was muffled.
"What was that, Connor."
Connor pulled away from the treat to repeat what he'd said.
"If you're not over your curry blasts, I'll bite you."
"Fair enough," said Ryan, shoving himself back into Connor's mouth just as Becker had finally yanked the last items of clothing from himself.
A quick glance over at the other team members surprised Connor quite a bit; Sir James Lester was being thoroughly reamed from both ends, quite a contrast from what you'd expect from the normally in control bureaucrat.
"Oh well," thought Connor. "I'll be in the same position soon enough."
Apparently soon enough meant now. Connor had just enough time to wonder why Becker was carrying KY Jelly in one of his many pockets before he was stuffed full of slick, hard cock, the sudden movement making his hands scrabble at Ryan's thighs.
It was rather a rush after that, Connor's pleasured whimpers being drowned out amongst the cacophony of sounds, Ryan's fingers gripping his hair, as Becker's moans rumbled through his spine, followed by a sudden stillness and a rush of wet heat from both ends.
Pulling away from each other, Connor and the two soldiers waited for the others to finish.
It happened not long after them. Smoothing his hoodie down (somehow Lester had managed to keep it on), he stood up, sans trousers, and proceeded to give his best ‘tell me what happened or else’ growl, which still worked better in the suit.
Cutter immediately started into a babble of how the plant must have been what made evolution work, by making creatures of similar species, but not quite the same, go into a mating frenzy, much like the way they'd just done.
"Of course it is, but what will we put on the report?"
"Dangerous Plantlife, avoid if at all possible."
"Very well, it's not the best, but at least it's not the truth, that stays between us, agreed?"
A chorus of Yeses came from the group as they started pulling their clothes back on.
Lester, Nick and Stephen chose to ignore the way Connor leaned towards the two soldiers, as well as the whispered words coming from his mouth.
"We still on for tonight, guys?"