three more weeks...
I am counting down the minutes until December vacation. Clearly I am overscheduled and stressed out because of it. I have always pushed myself, but I think I'm pushing a bit too far this year. I need to cut back. But what can I cut? The only things I could actually get rid of are the things that I really enjoy doing, so I don't want to stop. I love the glass mosaic classes - they're totally relaxing and fun and good for me to de-stress. I love playing volleyball - I have a hard enough time getting to the gym to work out, when I find a physical activity that I actually enjoy, I shouldn't let it go! Everything else, I'm committed to through the end of the school year. Gaaah.
I'm feeling like I might need a break from teaching sometime in the next few years - I need another year off. When I came back from my year at Harvard, I was totally rejuvenated and re-energized and ready to teach again. I feel like I need to do that again. But I most definitely CANNOT afford to take a year off (see, I've got this silly little mortgage...). I know that I'm just feeling whiny right now, probably because I had such a crazy weekend that I didn't get to rest at all. I should be coming back in January feeling better about things. I just have to make it until then...we're in school all the way up to Dec. 23rd...ugh.
The good news is that date #4 is tomorrow night. I dunno, I'm finding a strange reluctance to talk about this guy, like I'll jinx it if I actually admit that there's potential. Well, clearly there's something if we both still want to spend time together after 3 dates. But I'm finding that I've turned into that person that I never thought I'd be -- the one who's hesitant to invest in a potential relationship, afraid of what could be. In my head I know very well that the only way to actually find a relationship is to open up to possibility. But it's scary. I'm not letting it stop me, but it's still scary. The good thing is that this guy (I need to think of a better pseudonym than "Scrabble Guy" if he's going to stick around, I suppose) is moving very slowly with me, and it makes me feel very comfortable with him. By date #4, J. was already telling me that he hoped I would be "the one". This time around, all I've gotten is a hug and kiss on the cheek. It feels much safer. And because I feel safer, I'm feeling comfortable enough that moving forward maybe will be a little easier.
This blogging thing is therapeutic sometimes....
I'm feeling like I might need a break from teaching sometime in the next few years - I need another year off. When I came back from my year at Harvard, I was totally rejuvenated and re-energized and ready to teach again. I feel like I need to do that again. But I most definitely CANNOT afford to take a year off (see, I've got this silly little mortgage...). I know that I'm just feeling whiny right now, probably because I had such a crazy weekend that I didn't get to rest at all. I should be coming back in January feeling better about things. I just have to make it until then...we're in school all the way up to Dec. 23rd...ugh.
The good news is that date #4 is tomorrow night. I dunno, I'm finding a strange reluctance to talk about this guy, like I'll jinx it if I actually admit that there's potential. Well, clearly there's something if we both still want to spend time together after 3 dates. But I'm finding that I've turned into that person that I never thought I'd be -- the one who's hesitant to invest in a potential relationship, afraid of what could be. In my head I know very well that the only way to actually find a relationship is to open up to possibility. But it's scary. I'm not letting it stop me, but it's still scary. The good thing is that this guy (I need to think of a better pseudonym than "Scrabble Guy" if he's going to stick around, I suppose) is moving very slowly with me, and it makes me feel very comfortable with him. By date #4, J. was already telling me that he hoped I would be "the one". This time around, all I've gotten is a hug and kiss on the cheek. It feels much safer. And because I feel safer, I'm feeling comfortable enough that moving forward maybe will be a little easier.
This blogging thing is therapeutic sometimes....