(no subject)
So.
I applied for suicide girls. I wasnt expecting to hear back from them for a couple of weeks if at all. They got back to me in less than a day. They said I was perfect for their site. Now I have to fill out release forms and give two ID's and then send in a photoset and if they accept it... I would be a suicide girl.
But I have a lot to think about. I mean you start out clothed but have to end up fully naked in each photoset. Do I really want all these strangers looking at me naked? I mean to me when someone saw me naked it was because I had something special with them... that just changes everything. Its kind of against my morals... but my morals I realized have slowly been changing. I don't like that. Also, its like getting a tattoo... if I do it there is no taking it back... my pictures are up there for forever. I also am still currently living at my parents, it would be weird do be doing something like that when I'm still living at home... just weird. Also, do I really.. seriously have the guts to do that? I am shy as hell about my body... I don't know. 500 bucks a set! A girl needs money...
People seem to be more excited about it than I am. I just don't feel like I am as happy as I should be... maybe because deep down inside... I know I don't have the guts to go through with it?
This could be the one crazy thing for me to do in life.. this could be the ONE TIME that I take a chance and do something I am not sure about. Those girls are beautiful and are recognized nation wide for being gorgeous... but NOT like the rediculously skinny women you see on Cosmo.
I had a lot of people telling me I could do it and I should really try... so I did it just seeing.. not really expecting so its like.. whoa.
I've had a lot of people offer to take my pictures lol, but there is only one person in the world I would feel comfortable doing that with.
Anyways, last night i hit mboro. It was fun. I got home reallyyyy late. I really need to move out there.
I held someone's beer for them and everyone saw me holding it and thought I was drinking and freaked out. Everyone was looking at me and I got all red... :(
I applied for suicide girls. I wasnt expecting to hear back from them for a couple of weeks if at all. They got back to me in less than a day. They said I was perfect for their site. Now I have to fill out release forms and give two ID's and then send in a photoset and if they accept it... I would be a suicide girl.
But I have a lot to think about. I mean you start out clothed but have to end up fully naked in each photoset. Do I really want all these strangers looking at me naked? I mean to me when someone saw me naked it was because I had something special with them... that just changes everything. Its kind of against my morals... but my morals I realized have slowly been changing. I don't like that. Also, its like getting a tattoo... if I do it there is no taking it back... my pictures are up there for forever. I also am still currently living at my parents, it would be weird do be doing something like that when I'm still living at home... just weird. Also, do I really.. seriously have the guts to do that? I am shy as hell about my body... I don't know. 500 bucks a set! A girl needs money...
People seem to be more excited about it than I am. I just don't feel like I am as happy as I should be... maybe because deep down inside... I know I don't have the guts to go through with it?
This could be the one crazy thing for me to do in life.. this could be the ONE TIME that I take a chance and do something I am not sure about. Those girls are beautiful and are recognized nation wide for being gorgeous... but NOT like the rediculously skinny women you see on Cosmo.
I had a lot of people telling me I could do it and I should really try... so I did it just seeing.. not really expecting so its like.. whoa.
I've had a lot of people offer to take my pictures lol, but there is only one person in the world I would feel comfortable doing that with.
Anyways, last night i hit mboro. It was fun. I got home reallyyyy late. I really need to move out there.
I held someone's beer for them and everyone saw me holding it and thought I was drinking and freaked out. Everyone was looking at me and I got all red... :(