another day...
It has made me the happiest person alive, the most disapointed sometimes but by far the the most horrible painful thing ever, My past. Its starting to fade as the days go by knowing i have another day to go and another after that. I sit here thinking to myself, how did i ever make it through everything i went through. not just with boys. but everything. its amazing to me. but how come im not the happiest person alive. why cant i move on. i think about Andy all the time, how it kills me knwoing i cant hold his hand the same way anymore. "I love you" doesnt mean anything to what it used to. I dont see how i can look at my dad almost everyday knowing how bad he has hurt me inside and out. i have some great friends. whom ill cherish and love forever to come. with out my friends i dont know what id do. fuckk. id be so lost. Merced to me is known as a place to suffer and people here sure make that happen. moving out of this place will be one of the best things to happen to me. im goign to be sad to be leaving my friends, and everything thats meant something to me. but other then that i want to move. put all this shit behind me. and move on.