May 28, 2005 03:04
hmm, i'm on a bean.
travi is on core, and he's watching a movie! its crazy. usually when i dex, i watch movies, and he like, rolls around on the floor, and we dont trip together. well, since i'm on e right now, i'm so talkative. i have to be active right now. if i was out there i would ruin the movie for him, and i dont want him to get weirded out since i'm on the x. he said that he didnt like how i was on it last time. as soon as this movie is done tho, i'm goin out there to see what he wants to do. he might actually take over the comp, i'm not sure. i mean, i know that sex isnt an option, the core he's on, um, impairs him. which is ok with me, all i'm sayin is, i cant play video games right now or watch movies, and that basically leaves talking, an i'm not quite sure if he wants to do that or not. i'm tryin to get it all out of my system on this, so i dont bother him...but i dont know if i'm botherin him by being on this or not? i dunno what to do to make him happy. i try, i really really try. and i know that hes got a lot on his mind right now. i dont know if he wants to talk about it, he's always got a lil of a guard up around himself. i've learned to deal with the fact that he doesnt really want anyone in there. its not just me, i dont think. at least i hope its not just me. if so, then my turkey, whats the problem? you know i love you to the depth of my heart. i want to help you any way i can, especially if its somethin i can talk to you about. i'm all ears for you, love. the jail thing is just a speed bump for you, if thats what you let it be. SO MUCH TALENT, I CANT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. keep your hands in your pockets, for the band, for your future, for YOURSELF. its hard, it sucks. the job thing, its hard it sucks. but you know, i'm never in it for that. i like TRAVIS LEE. i heart the turkey you are. i know underneath the asshole, you're awesome, i'm just tryin to get that part out a little more often. cotton mouth like a mother effer! damn drugs. but i'm happy, and i really want travi to read this. i want to talk to him SO BAD, but i dont really know how.