On that beast we all love, "faux pas"...
So, have you ever said something to someone and realized a couple minutes later that it was really out of line, but feel bad about taking it back because it was completely true? This just happened to me. It's going through my mind and I'm thinking of all the things I need to say to the relevant people (but probably won't) and so unless I vent my frustration I'm not going to be able to sleep.
So... I am a Canadian living in the United States. I have six roommates, all of whom are American. Ben, in particular, really enjoys talking politics. I have some pretty strong political views, but I generally don't enjoy discussing them because it makes me really defensive and angry, and when those qualities surface in me, I really don't like myself much at all. Anyways, when there are six other people living in the house, even if I try to avoid political discussions, sometimes I can't help but be sitting right in the middle of one that starts up out of nowhere - for instance, maybe around the dinner table if a lot of us are eating at the same time, or if we're all sitting in the living room doing different things. Ben, Janice, Rachel, Kael and I were all sitting in the living room, and admittedly, we were watching the Republican convention, which should have warned me about what was to come. However, I was pretty interested in listening to McCain speak. To be quite honest, I'd probably vote for Obama in the election if I could, just because I traditionally identify with more liberal values and always will, but I wouldn't be terribly sad if McCain got elected. Either way, I am quite sure that the US is going to be in better shape than it has been for the past eight years. Anyways, I digress.
The discussion started - a continuation, actually, from last night's discussion, which I chose not to participate in. Things got heated, and after Ben said he couldn't understand why anyone would even consider voting for the Republican ticket this election, and then later said that he just wanted to change the way people formulated their views through more education, I said that he couldn't possibly change anything if he couldn't listen to other people's points of view. And... that silenced the room. At that point, I didn't think it was so bad, but then I realized that it kind of was. I apologised for making it sound so offensive... but... I still believe it. Does that make me a bad person? Knowing that every political discussion I've had with Ben has always ended with me being angry because he seems to want me to agree with him, and passionately? I don't like discussing politics, especially when it's "passionate". Shouldn't he respect that about me, just as I respect the political passion in him? I don't know. I just feel like impassioned discussions just end with someone hurting someone's feelings. And evidently I was the culprit tonight. I hate that. Gah. I wish this election was over already so the tension in the house could just be gone and I could stop feeling bad about what I said.
Another thing about the election. In the 1860s in the United States, black men and white women were fighting alongside each other for the right to be able to vote. Black men got the right to vote in 1870. Women didn't get the right to vote until 1920. The Democratic party, until a month or so ago, had a black man and a white woman fighting alongside each other for the nomination to run for president. The black man got the nomination. Are we going to have to wait until 2058 until another woman is fielded as a presidential candidate?
Also I BA-STROYED my feet from walking today. The entire bottom of each of my feet is one big giant aching blister. Owwwwww.... :(
So... I am a Canadian living in the United States. I have six roommates, all of whom are American. Ben, in particular, really enjoys talking politics. I have some pretty strong political views, but I generally don't enjoy discussing them because it makes me really defensive and angry, and when those qualities surface in me, I really don't like myself much at all. Anyways, when there are six other people living in the house, even if I try to avoid political discussions, sometimes I can't help but be sitting right in the middle of one that starts up out of nowhere - for instance, maybe around the dinner table if a lot of us are eating at the same time, or if we're all sitting in the living room doing different things. Ben, Janice, Rachel, Kael and I were all sitting in the living room, and admittedly, we were watching the Republican convention, which should have warned me about what was to come. However, I was pretty interested in listening to McCain speak. To be quite honest, I'd probably vote for Obama in the election if I could, just because I traditionally identify with more liberal values and always will, but I wouldn't be terribly sad if McCain got elected. Either way, I am quite sure that the US is going to be in better shape than it has been for the past eight years. Anyways, I digress.
The discussion started - a continuation, actually, from last night's discussion, which I chose not to participate in. Things got heated, and after Ben said he couldn't understand why anyone would even consider voting for the Republican ticket this election, and then later said that he just wanted to change the way people formulated their views through more education, I said that he couldn't possibly change anything if he couldn't listen to other people's points of view. And... that silenced the room. At that point, I didn't think it was so bad, but then I realized that it kind of was. I apologised for making it sound so offensive... but... I still believe it. Does that make me a bad person? Knowing that every political discussion I've had with Ben has always ended with me being angry because he seems to want me to agree with him, and passionately? I don't like discussing politics, especially when it's "passionate". Shouldn't he respect that about me, just as I respect the political passion in him? I don't know. I just feel like impassioned discussions just end with someone hurting someone's feelings. And evidently I was the culprit tonight. I hate that. Gah. I wish this election was over already so the tension in the house could just be gone and I could stop feeling bad about what I said.
Another thing about the election. In the 1860s in the United States, black men and white women were fighting alongside each other for the right to be able to vote. Black men got the right to vote in 1870. Women didn't get the right to vote until 1920. The Democratic party, until a month or so ago, had a black man and a white woman fighting alongside each other for the nomination to run for president. The black man got the nomination. Are we going to have to wait until 2058 until another woman is fielded as a presidential candidate?
Also I BA-STROYED my feet from walking today. The entire bottom of each of my feet is one big giant aching blister. Owwwwww.... :(